There was going to be a full moon that night, a night quite some time ago. I could feel it as I woke up....that meant something special.....I rose from my quarters that evening and looked around. The junkyard was glowing with moonlight. It was the night of the Jellicle Ball. I saw my Son conversing with Alonzo, and I overheard some of their conversation as I drew nearer. “But Munkustrap, this could be your last chance...not to mention hers,” Alonzo said. My Son answered, “We are young....the time will come again....not tonight....I think I shall wait until the next full moon.”
“Wait for what?” I inquired as I came to them. Alonzo shot Munkustrap an unpleasant look, and went away. I repeated my question. Munkustrap lowered his eyes to the ground. “Mother, it’s a queen.” “You’ll be dancing with one tonight, I presume?” I smiled excitedly at the possibility of my Son having a mate. Munkustrap shook his head. “I want to wait, Mother...” “Your father will meddle in this matter if word gets to him tonight, my dear......” I replied. My bubble having burst, I simply nudged him in comfort. I continued, “I know your father...” and then stopped. Maybe I was distressing him.
Munkustrap cuddled up to me as if he were a Kitten....and I......I missed it. I had missed it. This was one of the only chances I’d have to get it back, and so I soaked in the silence, and I rocked him back and forth, like a Mother would have done to a Little Kitten. I tried my best to picture Him as a Kitten........but it was impossible. My Son was one year old now. I had been with him for the first few weeks of his life...but I ran away.......I abandoned him. NO! I didn’t abandon my Son....Dueteronomy, his father, commanded me to go...to leave My Own Kitten!
And the Fool I had been to listen...I came back when He was just about eleven months and some. It was a few days before a Jellicle Ball, a few days before The Jellicle Ball at which my Son would dance, and my Son would dance as an adult. Dueteronomy had missed me, Munkustrap had not. He didn’t even remember me....his father deprived him of knowing that he had in fact had a Mother at one time. Munkustrap was steaming with anger towards Me, and he couldn’t let it out. But in time, he gave me a chance to be his Mother again, and he even asked me to dance with him at the Jellicle Ball....he had said it to be “a dance with his Angel Mother.”
But he was two now, and I had missed him being a Kitten. My mind returned to the point in time, with my Son close to my heart, safe in my arms, and I thought of it as catching up. Munkustrap reached up and kissed my cheek. Then, Alonzo was calling him. He stood up, as did I. I looked at my Son. He seemed so large in stature compared to me....I looked up to meet his eyes, and they were smiling. Then, Alonzo’s voice intervened again. “MUNKUSTRAP! Bluefen can wait! This can’t!” Munkustrap shook his head, and said to me, “Mother, I have to go now, Alonzo is waiting, he won’t let the matter rest...” and with one more glance and smile of the eyes, he went off. ‘Bluefen can’t wait!’ I thought, perhaps a bit upset. Oh well....I sat down and watched the last rays of the sun vanish into the evening that had taken over the sky and sighed.
Meanwhile, Alonzo and Munkustrap continued to quarrel. “Tonight could be your only chance to dance with her! What if another tom does? Then she’ll be mated off, and you will never get another chance with her,” Alonzo persisted. Munkustrap sighed. “But....it just doesn’t feel right tonight....it’s not the right...the right time.” Alonzo just bit his lip, looked toward the heavens, and rolled his eyes. Then, he walked away. Munkustrap sat alone, and he too looked toward the heavens, as if Alonzo had been looking for something, and he wanted to see too. He closed his eyes, and let a light breeze whip at his face.
The rest of the cats in the junkyard bustled about happily, preparing for the festivities of the night. Victoria bounded up to Munkustrap. She leapt up and put her paws on his chest for balance. She cocked her head at him. “Whatchya dooin?” the three-month-old asked. “Thinking,” Munkustrap replied, his eyes remained closed. “Well, watchya thinkin’ about?” the small queen inquired. He opened his eyes, and smiled half-heartedly. “Love.” Victoria scrunched up her nose. “You’ll understand when you’re older....” he trailed off, and closed his eyes again.
Getting bored with the strange mumbling that she got as a reply, Victoria took her paws off of his chest, stood to her normal height, and trotted over to Bombalurina, who was sleeping in the washer. Victoria poked at the other queen’s flanks. Bombalurina soon woke up, and let out a cry of pain. “Whoops....” Victoria said apologetically. Bombalurina smiled weakly. “It’s all right. I’ve done that before, and I only give what I can take.”
“Bomby, you’re Munkustrap’s age....what’s.....what’s Love?” Bombalurina was a bit surprised, but tried as best she could to answer the question. “Love...Love is what brings the world together, what unites us all as living beings. Love is creation, sorrow, peace, happiness, anger, and every feeling possible.”
Victoria scrunched up her nose again. “But...but love is a good thing...isn’t it?” Bombalurina nodded. “Yes. But I can be angry at you, and still love you. I can be sad if you ever leave, but I’ll still love you.”
“What about creation?” Victoria asked. “Well....” Bombalurina wasn’t going to go into anything. “Creation, when you make something, like....like a.....when you make up a game! You put all your strength into it, and you’re proud of the output, correct?” Victoria nodded. “Well, when you’re making up that game, you love what you’re doing, don’t you?” Victoria beamed. “Oh, I get it now! Gee, thanks!” She excitedly ran off to the other kittens her age. The activity died down, in an effort to save energy for the Ball, and almost all of the cats were in some sort of shelter, whether it be the washer, the dryer, the pipe, or the car, save two.
Munkustrap still sat with his eyes closed, facing what was now a bitter wind. I was laying on the hood of the car. The others were inside, and not paying a bit of attention. I watched him closely, but made no sound and no movement toward him. Munkustrap was whispering to the moon, whispering so that no one would hear but the moon, himself, and...I know I wasn’t supposed to hear him....but I did...I don’t know how it happened...but I heard him loud and clear.
Will I ever find love? Am I meant to be alone? Does She care? Do I matter at all in this cold, imperfect world? Is it all a dream?................................................................... ......................................................................Will I ever find love?
I too turned to the moon, and asked her something...I still do not know if Munkustrap heard it....but I asked the moon something that night, that night so long ago.
Let My Munkustrap find love.....Let Her, whoever She may be, love my Baby. Please, guide him, and help him. I doubt that he turns to me with his many questions........ ............................................................................Let him find love.
Then I turned away from the moon, afraid that Munkustrap might see me in a moment of weakness. My tears fell as if they were to flood the junkyard. I sobbed uncontrollably, shaking. Munkustrap must have turned and caught sight of me. The next thing I knew, he was holding me in a strong embrace, whispering in my ear. “Sssshhh...it’s all right. I’m here now. Have no fear....”
He fell silent, and I was unsure of his silence, but then I felt hot tears hitting my fur like flaming daggers. I clung to him as if he were Life itself, and he held me. I felt him tremor, and my tears must have been cold to him. It felt like Forever, like Forever in Paradise....I vowed I would never tell anyone about it, this was too private....I’d never cried like that before with anyone. It was between......between my.....my Baby and I....No......my Tom and I. No one was going to know. No one had to know.
When all of our tears had fallen, Munkustrap laid on the car hood, and looked toward the moon. I groomed myself so I would be presentable for the Jellicle Ball, and then started to groom Munkustrap. Suddenly, I stopped.
He turned to face me. “What is it?” he asked. “You...you’re....you’re an adult now....you can do it yourself....” I said, depression dwelling in my voice.. He simply turned away, and went back to gazing at the moon. I couldn’t help but let my eyes smile, I knew what he wanted me to do. I went back to grooming him contentedly. When I was finished, he turned around again.
“Mother, you look dazzling,” he said, and I must have overflowed with pride. My Tom appreciated me. I looked him over slowly and carefully, with a Mother’s keen eye. “You’re glowing,” I said, and sighed contentedly. “Oh, it’s your work, Mother, your work.” I smiled. I knew what he meant. Not only did I just primp and polish him to the desire of both of our hearts, he looked exactly like me, or as close as two could be in appearance when they’re of different genders.
Everyone began to stir again, and the Jellicle Junkyard was suddenly full of life. There was much dancing and singing, merrymaking, and plain old fun! About one fourth of the way into the festivities, Tantomile froze, and looked around, as did Coricopat. Mistoffelees perked his ears. “Old Dueteronomy...........”
And with that, in tottered the Old Pig! I turned away, and Munkustrap padded softly over to me. “Don’t worry, Mother...” “Just make sure that Alonzo doesn’t let him know about the situation with...that Queen....I just know he’ll meddle in it.” Munkustrap reluctantly left me, and I watched his attempts to keep Alonzo away from Old Dueteronomy. Old Dueteronomy kept away from both Alonzo and myself, and I breathed a sigh of relief.
Munkustrap came back to me, and whispered, “Father wishes to see you, Mother....” “Then why doesn’t he come see me himself?” I whispered harshly. Then, instead of taking it out on my Tom, I went over to Old Dueteronomy. “Munkustrap told me of your wishes,” I said, bowing slightly. “Yes, Bluefen, my Love.” I rose, pain and suffering instilled in my eyes...he had caused me that pain and suffering, when he took my Tom away from me! I was so angry at him. He continued. “Dearest Bluefen, my Dearest Bluefen, how has life treated you?” “Better than you have....” I said through gritted teeth. I was angry at him, so angry that it was indescribable...and there he was, trying to swindle me back into his clutches! Who did he think I was? Better yet, who did he think HE was? “That is in the past,” he said, looking apologetic. I couldn’t control myself anymore, and I set fire to my thoughts. “WHAT YOU HAVE DONE TO ME WILL ALWAYS HAUNT ME! IT WILL ALWAYS BE A PART OF ME! YOU TOOK MY TOM AWAY FROM ME!” I screamed. The whole Junkyard froze completely, and I could feel their eyes on that Pompous Idiot and myself.
Munkustrap rushed to me, and once more I was in his embrace. I started to weep softly into his fur. I felt him tremor again, my tears were still cold to him. He glared at Old Dueteronomy. “What did you do to her? What did you say to her?” Dueteronomy returned the glare, and it was harsh to the extreme. But he stayed silent. Munkustrap’s volume rose. “What did you say to her!?!?!” Old Dueteronomy looked out over the faces of the other Jellicles, and without answering Munkustrap, he bellowed, “CONTINUE!”
Munkustrap ushered me away from his father, and I continued to cry. Time drifted away with my tears, and soon, Munkustrap said to me, “The Queens are dancing...” After a moment, I did not feel his strong grasp, and I looked to the center of the Junkyard. There was the graceful Demeter, dancing. My Tom was nowhere to be seen.
Then came the part where a tom was to join in. I saw many step in, and each looked around at the others. There was Skimbleshanks, The Rum Tum Tugger, The Scum Dueteronomy, and Alonzo. Three, seeing Old Dueteronomy, stepped back into the shadows with a dance. Then, another tom appeared out of the shadows to....to challenge Dueteronomy! It was my Tom...this was His Queen! I felt dizzy with joy, and watched to see the outcome. The toms danced in a circle around Demeter, and she was bright with pride. The toms sized up the other, and Dueteronomy finally stepped down, and danced humbly back into the shadows!
My Tom danced with Demeter, he being just as graceful as her, but in a different way. The Jellicles of the Junkyard watched with pure wonder as Munkustrap claimed Demeter as his mate with the old dance from long ago. The kittens had never seen the likes of it, and I was surprised that Munkustrap remembered it. The eyes of all the kittens, such as Victoria, Electra, Jemima, Mistoffelees, Sillabub, and Plato were plastered to Munkustrap and Demeter. They had been taught a different dance, a new one, to change tradition slightly, but it was clear that they liked this one better. I decided that I would teach it to them on another day.
After all of the queens’ dancing was done, Munkustrap rushed Demeter to me. I hugged her as tightly as I could. “Welcome...” I said. There was no need to say more. Munkustrap joined in the embrace. Then, we all joined in the dancing. Soon, Dueteronomy was gone, and the three of us were happy in our hearts. The glorious night had come to an end, and I had not only my Tom. I bid goodnight to my Tom, and turned to Demeter. “Goodnight, pleasant dreams.” I smiled at my Queen, and we both went to sleep, Munkustrap sandwiched between us, watching over us contentedly.