I'm So Bored.COM's
Red Neck Jokes:
You might be a Redneck if...
1. More than one living relative is named
after a southern Civil War general.
2. Your front porch collapses and kills more than 3 dogs.
3. You've ever used lard in bed.
4. Your home has more miles on it than your car.
5. You think that spam on a saltine is an hors d'ouevre.
6. There is a stuffed possum (sic) anywhere in your house.
7. You consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.
8. Fewer than half of your cars run.
9. Your mother doesn't remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling
the State Trooper to kiss her ass.
10. The primary color of your car is "bondo."
11. You honestly think that women are turned on by animal noises
seductive tongue gestures.
12. You stand under the mistletoe at Christmas and wait for Granny and
cousin Sue-Ellen to walk by.
13. Your family tree doesn't fork.
14. Your hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan.
15. Your mother has been involved in a fistfight at a high school sports
17. You've ever barbecued Spam on the grill.
18. The best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the shade.
19. The neighbors started a petition over your Christmas lights.
20. Your brother-in-law is your uncle.