Spaceballs: The Sounds
These are some of my favorite wavs from Spaceballs. If there are any others that you would like to see, go ahead and email me at Yank2010@yahoo.com
Liquid Schwartz Wavs
Attendent - Five minutes to magic time
SANDURZ -Thank you, your highness.
HELMET -What'd you do?
SANDURZ - turned off the wall.
HELMET -No you didn't. You turned off
the whole
movie.
SANDURZ -Well I must have pressed the wrong button.
HELMET -Well, turn it back on. Put the
movie back
on.
SANDURZ -Yes, sir. Yes, sir.
HELMET -We gotta get that thing fixed.
We're back,
and we have the combination.
Captain of the Guard - Spectacular stunt. my friends, but all for naught.
GUARD (MILA) -What the hell are you
doin'?
LONE STARR -The Vulcan Neck Pinch.
GUARD (MILA) -No, no, no, stupid, you've got it much
too high. It's down here where the shoulder meets the neck.
LONE STARR -Like this?
GUARD (MILA) -Yeah.
LONE STARR - There's gotta be a self-
destruct mechanism somewhere in the central brain area.
CAPTAIN - You idiots! These are not
them. You've
captured their stunt doubles!
Colonel Sandurz - Do Something!
Barf - Let's go!
King Roland - Helmet! You fiend!
HELMET - Schlotkins.
SCHLOTKINS - What?
.
HELMET - We're done with you. Go back to the golf
course and work on your puts.
SCHLOTKINS - Let's go Arnold. Come Gretchen. Of
course, you know, I'll still have to bill you for this.
Helmet - Found anything yet?
Guard - We ain't found shit!
Dark Helmet - Now you see that Evil will always triumph because Good is dumb.
HELMET - What the hell am I
looking at? When does
this happen in the movie?
SANDURZ - Now. You're looking at now, sir. Everything
that happens now, is happening now.
HELMET - What happened to then?
SANDURZ - We passed then?
HELMET - When?
SANDURZ - Just now. We're at now, now.
HELMET - Go back to then.
SANDURZ - When?
HELMET - Now.
SANDURZ - Now?
HELMET - Now.
SANDURZ I - can't.
HELMET - Why?
SANDURZ - We missed it.
HELMET - When?
SANDURZ - Just now.
HELMET - When will then be now?
SANDURZ - Soon.
Ring of the Schwartz Wavs
Helmet - Careful, you idiot. I said
across her nose, not up it.
Gunner - Sorry, sir. Doing my best.
Helmet - Who made that man a gunner?
Major - I did, sir. He's my cousin.
Helmet - Who is he?
Sandurz - He's an Asshole, sir.
Helmet - I know that. What's his name?
Sandurz - That is his name, sir. Asshole, Major
Asshole.
Helmet - And his cousin?
Sandurz - He's an Asshole, too, sir. Gunner's-mate,
1st Class, Philip Asshole.
Helmet - How many Assholes we got on this ship,
anyhow?
Spaceballs - Yo!
Helmet - I knew it. I'm surrounded by Assholes.
Keep firing, Assholes.
1st Ape = Dear me, what are those
things coming
out of her nose?
Helmet - Hey, hey, watch my helmet.
2nd Ape - Spaceballs?
1st Ape - Oh shit, there goes the planet.
Vespa - ahhh
Helmet - Fooled You!
Barf - What the hell was that?
Lone Starr - Spaceball 1.
Barf - They've gone to plaid.
Barf - there it is, Spaceball City, straight ahead.
Helmet - Commence operation Vacusuck.
Sandurz - She's gone from suck to blow!
Helmet - Put 'er there.
Helmet - The ring. I can't believe you fell for the oldest trick in the book.
What a
goof. What's with you man? Come
on.
Barf - Okay, we save her, but how?
The minute we move in there, they're spot us on their radar.
Lone Starr - Uh-uh.
Barf - Uh-huh.
Lone Starr - Uh-uh.
Barf - Uh-huh.
Lone Starr - Uh-uh, not if we jam it.
Barf - Ah, ha! You're right.
Lone Starr - Down scope.
Barf - Down scope.
Barf - Radar, about to be jammed.
Dark Helmet- 'I bet she gives great helmet.'
Sandurz- 'uhhhhh.'
Spaceballs- 'Hail Skroob.'
Barf- ' One million spacebucks...we'll be able to pay off Pizza the Hut.'
Lone Starr- ' Gimme Paw.'
Barf & Lone Starr- 'Awhohohohohoho'
Lone Starr- ' That's all we needed....a Druish princess.'
Barf- 'Funny.....she doesn't look Druish.'
Lone Starr- 'awww Thank you
Dinks- 'Dink Da Dink Dink
Lone Starr- 'Did I miss something ....when did we get to Disneyland?'
Dark Helmet- 'I always have coffee when I watch radar....you know that.'
Sandurz- 'Of course I do sir.
Dark Helmet- 'Everybody knows that.'
Everyone- ' Of course we do sir!'
Barf- 'Check Please.'
Colonel Sandurz: 'Sir, hadn't you better buckle up?'
Dark Helmet- 'Ahhhh...Buckle This!'
Lone Starr- 'Uh oh, here comes the bad year blimp.'
Dark Helmet- 'Come back, you fat bearded bitch.'
Lone Starr- 'You are ugly when you're angry.'
Barf - Oh, no, Spaceballs. And they've
already got
her in their magnetic beam. Oh, well, we're too late. What a shame. I'll
just throw her in reverse, and we'll get outta here.
Lone Starr - Barf. No. Bad.
Barf - Oh, what are we doing risking our lives for
a runaway princess? I know we need the money...
Lone Starr - Listen. We're not just doing this for
money. We're doing it for a shit load of money!
Barf - Oh, you're right, and when you're right,
you're right, and you, you're always right.
Sandurz - Are you all right, sir?
Helmet - Fine. How've you been?
Sandurz - Fine, sir.
Helmet - Good.
Sandurz - It's a good thing you were wearing that
helmet.
Helmet - Yeah.
Sandurz - What should we do now, sir?
Helmet - Well, are we stopped?
Sandurz - We're stopped, sir.
Helmet - Good. Well, why don't we take a five minute
break.
Barf - I can't, I can't, I
can't go, I can't go
any further. I can't go any further.
Lone Starr - Just one more dune to go.
Barf - Nope. you said that three
dunes ago. I got
no more left. Oh, waiter, check please.
Bonus Mp3
Homer - When I first heard that Marge was joining the police academy, I thought it would be fun and zany, like that movie - Spaceballs. But instead it was dark and disturbing like that movie Police Academy
