*~~*~~*~~*~~*
Chapter Six
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The mall was a bustle. Cloe and Ved decided that they had to be married right away. Everyone was helping. I was part of the decorating committee with Trudy and Cloe. They seemed to be my new friends. Trudy and I have made up since her apology last week. We talked things out and now she was comfortable around me. She noticed the change that I have made and she is committed to see it continue.
Right now, we are sitting on the floor making paper chains out of white and silver cardboard. The chain has to be one hundred feet long and it is only twenty feet long at the moment. To say the least, it was going to take the whole week to finish the preparations for Cloe's wedding.
"So, Jay was sitting in the cafe yesterday. Ved came in and saw that his brother was laughing at him and they just start wrestling on the floor. I haven't seen anything like it for years." Trudy laughed. "Can you believe that it took Pride, Jack, and Lex to break them up? Jay still doesn't know what they were fighting about." Trudy looked to Cloe. "What were they fighting about?"
Cloe looked up and pushed back the hair that was in her face. She also rolled her eyes. "Ved has no idea. He just comes in the room with his shirt torn and says that Jay is an as.s."
"Sounds like an argument the two would have." I commented gluing one of the rings together. I started another ring waiting for one of them to say something. Neither said anything. "What? Did I say something wrong? I'm sorry. I'm really trying to be nice. I didn't mean anything by it." They still said nothing. "Okay, what's going on?" I noticed them looking behind me. "Who's behind..." as I was about to turn around, I felt something metallic being clasped around my neck. I reached up to touch it and noticed it was a ring necklace with a pendant on it. I then turned to see Jack kneeling behind me holding a small mirror. "What are you doing?"
"I got you something to match the dress you are wearing to the wedding." He held out the mirror for me to look into. The pendant was a silver amulet with a ruby background.
"It's beautiful." I reached out to hug him. "You are so great to me."
"No. I just saw it and thought of you." Jack put the mirror on the floor beside him. I pulled him so that he was sitting behind me.
I looked to Trudy and Cloe. They had sly smiles on their faces, but I decided to ignore them. "Wanna help us make paper chains?" I asked looking at him with a smile on my face. I'm so happy lately that all I can do was smile.
"I don't think so." He scooted back from me. "I have to go with Pride and Jay to find some cider." He stood up and dusted off his new pair of jeans. I couldn't help but notice how nice the baggy jeans and the black wife beater looked on him.
"Oh, do you mean cider like the stuff you used to get at Christmas, or the one that got you drunk when you were twelve and caused you to break your arm. And also the stuff that you get drunk on at every party."
He bit his lip and looked away from me. I knew the answer but he spoke up anyway. "The second one."
I jumped to my feet and walked over to him as he tried to back away from me. I grabbed him by his belt loops pulling him near me. "Don't drink any before the wedding. Okay?" I looked up at him with caring eyes. He had been drinking too much lately and I didn't want him to go through what Lex had to deal with.
He wrapped his arms around my shoulders and I wrapped mine around his waist. "I won't I promise." He let go of me and backed away. "I gotta go." He then turned and walked towards the main entrance.
"What was that?" Cloe asked with a mischievous smile.
"What do you mean?" I sat back down across from her and next to Trudy.
"I think she meant the warning and the grabbing of belt loops." Trudy answered.
"You guys always think that there is something up between me and Jack. We are only friends. I swear." I threw up my hands in defeat.
"You say that because you can't see you and Jack the way we can." Cloe answered.
"Okay then, tell me what you see." I stated almost annoyed that they keep bring this up. Jack and I have not done anything that is un friend-like. Well, besides the kiss.
"I see you turning your life around in two and half months. I see Jack becoming self confident and standing up for himself. I see you and him connected at the hip and yesterday, I saw you using a computer to type up invitations for Cloe's wedding." Trudy smiled as she saw me look confused.
"How does seeing us both change tell anything?" I was skeptical. I only saw Jack and I as friends.
Cloe looked to Trudy with a smile. "You don't change for your friends. You only change for those people that mean the most to you."
I sighed heavily. "Jack is my best friend. He was the first person here to give me a chance. That means a lot to me."
"Sure. Keep telling yourself that." Cloe replied.
Trudy looked at me with kindness. I knew they weren't hassling me. They seemed to be trying to give me information. “That also doesn't explain that look on your face when you see him and when he gave you that necklace." I reached up and touched the necklace. I ran my finger and thumb over the pendant. "See, that was the look. You love him."
"No. I don't." With that I went back to making more chains letting them know to let the conversation die.
*~~*~~*~~*~~*
Chapter Seven
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"I now pronounce you husband and wife." I never cried at weddings, but for some reason, watching Cloe and Ved kiss made tears come to my eyes. I leaned against Jack as he looked down at me. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a handkerchief. I looked up at him as he wiped away my tears. He put away his handkerchief before using his finger to wipe away the smudging eyeliner. I took his hand in mine as I followed the group up the steps to the cafe.
Everyone was happy. I would have retched at this sight not too long ago. Now, I was wondering if I would have such a happy wedding the second time around. This past week, I had wondered if I would ever get past a man like Ram. He hurt me. He hurt me more than I knew at the time. But he hurt me less than Jay. Jay tore my heart from my chest. Together, the two Technos made me a mess.They made the person I am today. They made me the person that Jack had to protect today.
"Ebony," Jack was behind me and placed his free hand on my bare waist. "Would you like something to drink?" I nodded and he was off to get some drinks.
I walked around the room not finding anyone to talk to. Jay and Trudy were talking to Cloe and Ved. The only other person that I was a friend with was Salene and Ellie was occupying her. I was not going anywhere near her after I hit her. It was wrong and I didn't want to have to do it again. So, I walked out of the cafe and into the hall to lean against the railing. It was cold against my bareback. Actually, All of me was cold. I wore a red silk halter-top, a long red silk skirt with slits all the way up my to my thighs. I reached up to touch the necklace that Jack gave me. It hadn't left my neck since he put it on me.
"A penny for your thoughts?" Jack asked leaning up next to me.
"I was just thinking about the necklace. It is so beautiful." I was still touching the necklace. It was my most precious possession.
"Not as beautiful as you are." I handed me the drink.
I blushed a little but commented on his attire. "What about you in your suit?" I straitened his jacket collar. "I like the no tie look."
"Tha..Than..Thank you." He stuttered. It was odd to hear him stutter. He hadn't done it for a long time.
"You're welcome." I took a sip of the drink surprised to find that it was Kool-Aid. "Why do I have Kool-Aid?"
"Because I know you worry about me becoming dependant on alcohol. That was my way of telling you that I'm not drinking tonight." He smiled down at me.
"Thank you." I stood on my tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek. "You are so good to me. I don't know why Ellie gave you up."
He leaned close to my ear. I could feel his breath hot against my skin and felt Goosebumps rise on my entire body. "I never gave her anything."
"What do you mean?" I pulled back and looked at him confused. "You gave her presents all the time." I leaned against the railing against.
He moved so that he was in front of me with his arms on either side of me. He leaned in again, the same feelings washed over me. His voice was deeper as he spoke. It was as if he was telling me an unbelievable secret. Like all the gossip we shared. "I really never gave her anything. I'm a virgin." He deliberately blew in my ear as he pulled back. "Why so shocked?" he just looked at me and he was leaned over me. I felt trapped.
"I'm no... I'm not." I squeaked out. I really was shocked. How could he be twenty and still a virgin? Especially the way that he looked now. Any girl would be lucky to be with him. He's sweet, honest, and built.
"You seemed shocked." He moved back to his position beside me. As he moved, I saw Trudy smiling at me from across the room.
"I think I need some air." I stated walking past his smiling figure. I swear I could have heard him laugh when I almost tripped as I tried to walk past him without looking at him.
*~~*~~*~~*~~*
I came back ten minutes later to find everyone dancing around the statue. Everyone was happy and I was glad that Cloe and Ved’s wedding was going well. Both of them have seen so much pain and suffering for their sixteen years. They deserved a happy life.
I walked over to Cloe and hugged her tightly. “Congratulations! It was a beautiful wedding.”
“Thank you for your help in decorating and gathering supplies.” Cloe gushed pushing back a stray curl.
Ved walked over and joined us. “Well, I better leave you.” I gave Ved a quick Hug. I never used to like the kid but he’s cleaned up his act. Plus, Jack is a friend with him. That’s all I need to know. Jack’s hardly ever wrong about people.
Speaking of Jack, I looked around the room for him. I couldn’t see him at firs, but then I saw Amber trying to drag him onto the dance floor. He finally gave in just as the song ended. Then a slow sultry song blared from the stereo. She immediately pulled him against her. The two danced in time with each other although Jack was a little stiff with his movements.
I walked over to where they had been standing and leaned against the wall. No one was near me, so I played with the pendant on my necklace to keep from looking at the couple.
I loved the feeling of the necklace. It was smooth and cool despite the fire design. The color of the stone background was the same as Jack’s hair. I smiled thinking about twenty minutes ago. I over reacted. For some reason, havin him that close made my chest ache like someone was about to attack. I had to get away from the situation.
Jack’s voice drew me away from my thoughts. “I missed you.” He leaned against the wall next to me. “Did you see me dance?” He laughed with a huge smile. “I was horrible, but Amber lied to me. She swore that I was the best she’s ever danced with.”
“You were great. “I turned so that only my shoulder leaned against the wall and I was facing him. “May I dance with you later?”
He wrapped his arm around my shoulders. “Anytime.”
We stood like that for what seemed like hours as people came by to speak with Jack about various topics or just to catch up. I just stood quietly listening to the chatter and enjoying the comfort of leaning against Jack. Finally, Trudy brought Jay over to us and I would have someone to talk to. Seeing them approaching, I moved so that my back was against Jack. He still held me against him with his right arm around my shoulders and his hand on my left shoulder.
“Don’t you two look cozy?” Trudy asked with a smile.
“Actually, we are.” Jack answered quickly. Trudy may have apologized, but he wasn’t about to forgive her so easily.
“Good.” Trudy looked from Jack to me. “I love you dress Ebony.”
“Thank you. I found it in one of the storage rooms.” I knew she was trying to change the subject so I helped her. “Wanna come with me to get a drink?”
“Sure.” She answered.
I moved from Jack but he grabbed my left hand. “Do you want something?”
“A glass of whisky.” I started to move again but he still had a hold on me. “Come back soon.” I smiled at him then followed Trudy across the room and up the steps.
*~~*~~*~~*~~*
Chapter Eight
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“What did he call you back for?” Trudy asked as we entered the deserted Café.
I walked to the worktop and opened the whiskey. “He wanted a drink.”
“Oh, I thought I heard him say ‘come back soon.” Trudy asked with a smirk.
“You did.” I closed the bottle. “I ran off earlier.”
“Really?” She began to pour two glasses of cider.
“Yeah. I got this uncomfortable feeling earlier. It was like something was about to attack me.” I stated a little unsure of myself.
“Was the something Jack?” She asked with a look that made me think she knew something I didn’t.
“Yeah.”
She handed me a glass of cider. “He probably was.” She raised the drink to her lips.
“Jack wouldn’t attack me.” The thought was ludicrous. He would never hurt me.
“Hon, have you looked at what you are wearing? There’s something wrong with him if he didn’t want to.” I almost choked on my drink. “What?”
“Ebony, he’s held you against him all night. No other guy would dare to try to even look at you. He’s staking his claim whether he knows it or not.”
“Do you think he knows he’s doing it?” I sat my drink beside Jack’s
Trudy did the same. “No. It’s subconscious. He’s in denial just like you are.”
“What am I in denial about?” I stood up strait and acted like I was the warrior I used to be.
“Don’t play, you know you’re in love with him.” She laughed at the look of shock on my face. “Don’t deny it. You may not have known before today, but oyu knew when you walked out of the mall earlier.”
“No. We’re just friends.” I picked up the drinks and walked out.
“You’ll find out different. He loves you too. Just pay attention to him.”
I tried to ignore her as we joined the guys. Jay immediately wrapped his arm around Trudy. She smiled at me knowingly. I handed Jack his drink. He took it then did as Jay did. I looked to Trudy and she almost laughed. I just turned to bury my head in Jack’s chest. Soon after, I felt him bring his hand up to my hair as he continued to talk to Jay about a security system. I looked up at him and he looked down at me with caring eyes. I smiled despite myself and returned to hide in his chest. Trudy was right. He did care for me as more than a friend.
When I stopped thinking, I noticed that Jay and Trudy were gone. I looked around with Jack’s hand still on the back of my head. “What happen to them?”
“They just walked off.” Jack announced. “I was beginning to think that you fell asleep.”
I smiled at him. “Why didn’t you say something if I was bothering you?” I stuck out my bottom lip in a fake pout at having bothered him.
He laughed and pushed back one of my braids as I took a step away from him. “You weren’t bothering me. I was just wondering if you want to dance.”
“Yeah!” I exclaimed immediately taking his hand and leading him to the center of the room. It was a rap song but it was still a close dancing song. Before I did anything, he wrapped one arm around my waist drawing me near letting his other fall to his side. I moved my body to the beat. Then I realized the only way that Jack knew how to dance. That was the reason that he wasn’t dancing well with Amber. He has to move with someone. Amber was trying to just sway to the slow song. His body was almost glued to mine. Every move I made, he copied perfectly. I could almost faint from the heat of him. No guy had ever moved with me like that. Not even in the bed. And here was Jack, the boy that was always too geeky for my liking and he was heating me up. I looked up a him and he brought his hand up to my cheek.
That was the last straw. Trudy was right. I was in love with him. More so than with any other guy than I have ever been with. It happened so quickly. How could I have not known that I was falling? Wait… I cleaned his room, slept in his bed, kissed him, and got him a drink. I would have never done any of those things for a guy I was just friends with. He.ll, I wouldn’t clean the room or get a drink for a guy that I was sleeping with.
The song ended and I walked off to the side and sat on the bench. He sat beside me and noticed that I wasn’t talking. “What’s wrong, Ebs?”
“Nothing. I was just thinking.” I tried to stop thinking about it but he was so close and the realization just hit me. You just can’t forget about something like that so quick. He smiled at me. He was having the time of his life. For Jack, that was something that was amazing. Before he came back from the Technos, he couldn’t stand parties. He was too shy.
“I’m about to throw the bouquet!” Cloe announced from the level just above us.
Trudy ran across the room and took my hand pulling me up and over to the crowd of girls waiting for the bouquet. Everyone was pushing and pulling to get a good spot. Jack and Jay were sitting on the bench watching Trudy and I as we fought against each other. The two guys were laughing and pointing at what stupid things us girls were doing. Finally, Cloe threw the flowers. I felt the cool stems against my hand and jumped with joy. I actually caught it! Cool!
I ran over to the guys with Trudy behind me. “Look, I caught it!” I jumped up and down. I knew it wasn’t lady-like, but I couldn’t help it. I had stopped myself from doing any of this stuff before. This was my first chance to be like everyone else. I turned to Trudy. “I caught it.” They were all laughing at me but I didn’t care.
“Yeah, baby. We can see that.” Jack stated but I paid no attention to him. I noticed Cloe walking down the steps and walked over to her. I hugged her again and showed her that I got the flowers.
“Congrats. You know that means you’ll be the next one married?” she joked taking Ved’s hand.
“No. That is just superstition. I don’t believe in that sh.it. I make my own decisions about when I get married.”
“Sure, well, I gotta go.” Before I could even say goodbye, she was gone.
I walked back to the group. “Well, I’m going to go put these in some water.” Trudy came with me. I didn’t say anything until I got to my room. I put the flowers in a vase that already had a flower in it. “The flowers are beautiful.” Trudy sat on the edge of the bed looking at me. “What?”
“You saw it didn’t you?”
“Yeah.” I answered quietly. “I’m in love with him.”
“I knew it!” She exclaimed patting the bed next to her. “Dish! What made you realize?”
“Well, we were dancing so close and I realized that he couldn’t dance unless the person he was with could dance. You know, he just moves with the person.” Trudy motioned with her hands to get on with it. “So, I looked up at him and he put his hand on my cheek. It as the most amazing feeling I have ever felt. I felt like fainting and I felt like I was superwoman at the same time. It was quite confusing.”
“So, did you say anything to him?” Trudy asked eagerly.
I looked at her oddly. “What do you think? No. I didn’t tell him. You could be wrong about him. He could just think that I am annoying for hanging off him all the time. I am just going to take a step back from him. You know what I mean?”
“Yeah, I know what you mean.” Trudy stood. “You could lose him if you play games. Don’t hurt Jack. More than one person around here will not be supportive of you.” She walked towards the door. “Don’t hurt yourself. He won’t hurt you no matter what his feelings are. Just give him the same chance that he gave you.”
Diary Entry #5
Can we just say that I have never been more confused, scared, and freaked out in my life? Let’s face it; I have had a confusing, frightening, and freaky life. This realization hit me in the face like a ton of bricks. I was minding my own business trying to fit into my new role as a “follower” with Jack’s help and now I think I am in love with him.
At first, I thought Trudy was just messing with me like kids did in the old days. You know when they would spread rumors about a guy and girl friend being a couple. But she was serious. She saw it before I did. Then again, everyone knew before I did according to Trudy. How could I have been so obvious? Jack can’t tell. How can they?
I’ve decided instead of following him around like a little lovesick puppy, I am going to put some distance between him and me. It will help me put things into perspective. Maybe if he feels the same, he will come out with it first and I can act like I was seduced. No feelings would be hurt that way. But, it is Jack, so I doubt I will be seduced. He is more of the romantic type. You know, dinners and walks on the beach. Or at least that is what I remember from the gossip about him and Ellie.
Jack doesn’t talk too much about love. Ellie hurt him more than he wishes to talk about. I can see it in the way that he glares at her. I remember glares like those. I used to give them to Bray because he was sleeping with every girl but me. I guess that is where Jack and I have something in common in relationships. Our first loves are sluts.
Back to Jack. At the wedding, I was so comfortable around him. When I was in his arms, I barely noticed the other people in the room. Then the dancing, ohhh, I will remember that best. He may not be a good dancer on his own, but the man knows how to keep a tempo with someone. I’ve never had anyone move so in tune with me. It was amazing. I always knew he was a fast learner, but damn! I wonder what else I can teach him??
BAD EBONY! You’re not supposed to think like that! I just can’t get his touch and moves out of my head. I think I am in too deep. UGGGHHH! I hate when I am not in control! Sometimes it is good to let a guy be in control. Okay, I think I am going to have to put this down. I can’t stop writing about my sexual thoughts. I’m doing pretty well for a girl that hasn’t got any in three months. Usually, I would be on the prowl for some tasty guy. Too bad I am going for a change to a more respectful Ebony. That means no gorgeous, strange men. That means I’ll have to settle for a man I know. NO! NO! I am really stopping this right now! Bye!
*~~*~~*~~*~~*
Chapter Nine
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I was lying on my bed writing when I felt the bed bow and Jack lay beside me. I quickly closed the diary as he rested his chin on my shoulder. I turned to look at him. His face was so close that my lips brushed against the temple of his forehead. I pulled back a little and he fell to the bed with a light thud. He laughed cheerfully.
“Why are you so happy? Coming in here and trying to spread that awful cheer. You should be ashamed of yourself.” I joked as he rolled onto his back.
“Ugh. I don’t know why I am happy. I have to walk all the way to the hotel and fix some computers for Jay since Ved is away. I don’t want to go.” He leaned so that his head fell off the side of the bed. I knew that he had drunk some of TaiSan’s hangover medicine. It made you hyper.
“Then don’t go.” I pushed the diary between the bed and the wall so he wouldn’t see it. “You have a hangover anyway.”
“How’d you know?” He swung back up on the bed giving himself a head rush. “OWWW. That hurt.” He put his hand to his head and I couldn’t help but laugh at the look on his face. He looked just like a little kid instead of the eighteen year old man he was. “It’s not funny. It hurts.”
I tried to stifle my laughter. “I know. It’s just, you should have seen the look on your face.” I laughed out loud again.
“Stop laughing at me!” He turned onto his stomach as I turned onto my back with laughter. I couldn’t stop and I had no idea why.
“I can’t!”
“I’ll give you something to laugh about!” With that he jumped on top of me and began to tickle me. I was to the point where I was about to cry and stop breathing.
“Jack! Stop! I can’t… breathe!” He didn’t listen only continued as I moved around under him trying to get away.
“No. You must pay for making fun of poor defenseless me.”
“De..fense…less?” I got out between breaths.
“Yeah. Not all of us are as fearless as you.” He let out. I don’t know why but his joke hurt me. I immediately sobered and tried to turn over under him. The way he was above me, I was able to move like that. He moved so that he was only facing me and not on top of me anymore. “What did I do? Did I hurt you?” I closed my eyes so that I didn’t have to look into his. They would be too caring and I would forgive him of hurting me. He didn’t even mean to hurt me and I was silly for feeling like this. “Was it what I said? I was only joking. I wasn’t trying to be mean.”
I could feel tears behind my eyes, but I refused to let them out with him around. “I know. I am just emotional.”
“All this wedding stuff getting to you?” He asked with a frustrated tone. “Since the virus, I thought I would be married and a father by now, but Ellie wasn’t interested in that. So, here I am and I am just happy to be looking for a girlfriend.”
“Not really, it’s other stuff. Nothing that I can really define.” I didn’t want to tell him that I wanted him to find me. I didn’t want him to know that minutes ago, I was thinking about his newly acquired six pack and running my hands and lips over it.
“If you need to talk about anything. You know how to find me.” He stated seriously. I could feel his hand moving my braids to a more appropriate position for them. I opened my eyes to find him staring into my eyes. His eyes searched mine desperately for a way to make me feel better. I never really took the time to look at someone’s eyes before. Zoot’s contacts killed that. His soft brown eyes were calming. He looked so deep into me that I knew that he was going to see my true feelings for him. “I wish I could help you. I can tell your hurting. You can let me in Ebony. All we have is each other. You and I could never depend on anyone else. Could we?”
I didn’t say anything. I just cried. I couldn’t tell him how I was feeling, but I could show emotion. He wiped the tears away as they fell to my cheek. Jack rolled to his back and pulled me to lay against his chest with my leg thrown over his. His free arm snaked around my waist. No one had seen me cry as often or feely as Jack had. For some reason, I knew that he was the person to let go to. He was the person that would and has changed everything for me. I slowly began to stop crying. “There you go. I bet you feel better now.”
“Yeah. I’ve been holding that in for some time.” I commented bring my hands under my chin clasped palm down against his chest.
“You can always let it out with me.”
“I know.” He reached up and wiped the final tear away. “Do you have to go to the hotel?” I pouted. I was comfortable now and I didn’t want him to leave. But it was inevitable. He was an important man in this broken world. Not many technological people still existed.
“Yeah, but you can come with me. I would love the company and you could boss Jay around. I think he is getting to used to doing what he wants.” He laughed gaining a smile from me. “There’s the smile that I love.” My heart stopped. Did he just say love? I think he did. He loves my smile. I laughed. “Now, there’s the laughter. I am on a roll today.” His smile continued. How could you not smile at him? It was infectious.
“Well, awhile ago doesn’t count because you were tickling me.” I answered matter-of-factly.
“Well, that made me smile. Don’t I deserve a treat too?” He asked sticking out his bottom lip. I wanted nothing more than to crawl up his body and nibble at that lip.
“Oh, what was your treat?” I asked cheekily. I had no idea, but I wanted him to think that I was cool and collected.
He acted as though he was thinking. “I don’t know. I think it had something to do with being on top of a sexy woman with her writhing in happiness beneath me.” He gave a naughty laugh. I was shocked. Not even with his more bold life would I have expected him to say such a thing. My mouth hung open. “Shut your mouth, Ebony. You know you liked it.” He joked mischievously.
I didn’t know what to do. Should I pretend to be outraged? Should I play along? Should I use this as a chance to make a move? “Actually I did.” I said without even thinking. Why did I say that?
“Wow. I guess the Technos did more than just help my body. I can actually get noticed by powerful women.”
“I’m not powerful anymore.” I stated with a little bitterness.
“You don’t have to rule a city to be powerful. You can be powerful in other ways.”
“How? I don’t have the power to capture another tribe.”
“You are powerful in other ways. Ebony, you changed me. Three months ago, I was still a geeky boy with little confidence. You taught me not to care about the other people in this tribe. You taught me to live my life to the fullest. That is power. You changed a life forever.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.” I didn’t know what else to say for a while, so we both just laid there for a few minutes before Jack said something. “I hate to leave you, but I gotta go to work.”
“No. Stay here.” I smirked. “I’ll write you a note.”
He moved out from under me. “Really? Maybe you could get me out of gym instead.” He stood from the bed as I rolled to my side to look at him better. He straitened out his clothes that were wrinkled from our tickling match. “I’ll see you later?”
“Yeah.” I sat up on the edge of the bed and then stood with him. “I’ll be here.” I walked with him to the door and leaned against the frame.
He stood in front of me. “Yeah. I’ll come by before I go to bed.”
“Well, bye. Be careful.” I grabbed each side of his open button down shirt and pulled it strait.
“I will. I lo..” He stopped himself mid word. “Bye.” He turned and then walked away. I watched him walk around the end of the steps before he was hidden from my view. I couldn’t help but wonder what he was going to say before he stopped himself. I didn’t hear the beginning of the word. It happened to fast. Whatever it was freaked him out. He left much too fast.
*~~*~~*~~*~~*
Chapter Ten
*~~*~~*~~*~~*
“Hey.” I stated from the doorway to Trudy’s room. She was sitting on the couch pulling Brady’s long blonde hair into a ponytail. At the sound of my voice, the little girl pulled away from her mother and ran over to me. “Hey, Brady! You look pretty today.” I stated noticing that she had Jay’s Techno belt slung across her body.
“Thank you. Daddy said that I could be a model. What’s a model, Ebony?” She asked taking my hand and leading me to sit on the couch next to Trudy before sitting in my lap.
“I model was a person that wore clothes so that others could see what they looked like. They were beautiful people.” I explain. Brady thought about it for a moment before smiling at me and jumping out of my lap and into the floor to play with her dolls.
“Where have you been?” Trudy crossed her arms in mock anger. A smile graced her lips. She knew where I was. She just wanted to hear all the details.
I turned to her and crossed my legs under me. “You know I was with Jack. If you want to know all the dirt, all you have to do is ask.”
“Okay, then, tell me. I’m dying to know what happened.” She turned to sit like me.
“He came into the room and fell on to the bed next to me and some how, he ended up tickling me. God, he looked so handsome. I just wanted to grab him right there. He looked so sexy. Did I mention that he was on top of me?” I asked with a giggle. Trudy laughed too. “Well, he said something to upset me and I got all quiet. We didn’t talk for much longer because he had to leave. He said something as he was leaving but I didn’t catch it. I’ll have to remember to ask him later.”
Trudy thought for a moment, containing her smile. The look on her face reminded me of the one on Brady’s just minutes before. “I thought you were going to avoid him for awhile.”
“I am starting tonight.” I vowed.
“Sure.” She stood and walked across the room to a table that held two paint cans. “I see that happening.”
I followed her. “It will. Just watch.” She handed me a white tee shirt. I assumed it was Jays. It smelled like him. “I have to do something to stop thinking about him. If I don’t I will attack him or do something that will end our friendship.”
She opened the can and stirred it. “How are you so sure that he doesn’t want you too?”
“Because, I am not his type. He likes them tall and blonde. I’m not pure enough for him”
“And Ellie was?” Trudy asked in sarcastic tone. “Honey, he loves you. I know he does. I’ve known him longer than you have. Listen to me.” She stopped stirring the paint and poured it into a pan.
I looked at her with a raised eyebrow. “You’ve only known him two months longer than I have. Plus, I spent quality time with him when he was spying on me at the hotel.”
“Ebony,” Trudy laughed. “Him listening in on your private conversations, you trying to find out if he is spying on you, and you trying to kill him does not count as quality time.”
“I wasn’t trying to kill him! How many times do I have to tell you all, I was only going to break his arm again? It’s not like it was set right after he broke it when he was drink that time. Who knows, I could have done him a justice by re-breaking and setting it for him.” I stated as if it were obvious that I was only helping him.
“Sure you were.” Trudy thrust a paint roller at me. “Okay, two of the walls are going to be navy blue and the other two are going to be fuchsia.”
“Navy blue and fuchsia?” I asked looking at her as if she were insane.
She cut her eyes at me. “Yeah. What is wrong with that?”
“You are an odd woman.” I put my roller in the paint.
She did the same. “I couldn’t decide and Jay insisted that the room have some blue in it. He said that all the purple was disturbing for a man.” She laughed thinking about a personal memory shared between the two.
“Okay.” I started painting the wall in the way that my mother taught me. “That is the reason that I can’t get into a relationship with Jack. He’ll try to put a computer in my room.”
“Look at it this way, he can’t paint your walls his favorite color. They’re already painted that color.”
“Yeah.” With that we set to painting and sharing embarrassing stories about Jay. I didn’t think I would be able to not think about her stealing him, but I could care less about Jay now. He was just a guy that proved that I had gotten over Bray.
*~~*~~*~~*~~*
I looked at the page of my diary. I couldn’t think of anything else, so I pushed it back to its hiding spot between my bed and the wall. I rolled over onto my back and fell asleep almost instantly. I hardly ever did that, but I guess a day of painting and trying to keep Brady out of the paint wears you out. The next thing I knew, Jack was sitting by me on the bed, looking at me.
“Hey, beautiful.” He greeted causing me to smile brightly. Then I remembered that I had to tell him that I needed some distance.
“Hey handsome.” I sat up some in the bed leaning against the headboard.
He laughed a little. “It’s not nice to lie to a boy like that.”
“I wasn’t lying. You are handsome. Haven’t you seen how some of the girls around here look at you?”
“They aren’t looking at me.” He looked at his lap. His hand was shaking.
I took it in mine. My hand was so tiny compared to his. My skin was dark against his. Our skin looked good together. “Jack,” It was now or never. “I need to tell you something.”
He looked up into my eyes. His were so happy and beautiful. I hoped that I wouldn’t hurt him by doing this, but it was the best for the both of us. “Okay. I’m listening.”
“I think we need to stop spending all this time together.” I was looking at my hand on the outside of his.
“What do you mean? You don’t want to be my friend anymore? What did I do?” He threw the words out as if he were trying to change my mind before he knew the reasoning behind the decision.
“I still want to be friends with you. I just need some time to think about the changes I have made. I’ve been with you every waking moment for the past month. It has hardly been enough for me to get settled into being a respectful person.” I looked up at him. He didn’t believe it. But I knew he would go along because I asked him to. He would do anything for his friends.
“Okay. But don’t stay gone long. I don’t want to lose you.” He moved his hand so that he held mine.
“Why would you lose me?” I looked up at him.
He took in a deep breath. “I argued with Dal and I never really told him that I was sorry before he died. I don’t want anything to happen to you. I can’t let anything happen to you.” He explained as his voice started to get lower with emotion. “If I lost you too, I would die.”
“Jack, you won’t lose me. I promise. I just need some time to think. You will still see me. It’s not like I am moving or anything.”
“Yeah.” He pulled away. And stood. “I guess, I’ll go to bed. Come see me when you are ready.” He said the last sentence with bitterness. I guess he thought I was going to forget about him and end our friendship. Ours was an important friendship. We could tell what the other was feeling most of the time. We have a special bond. I knew he was resenting me, but things will be better this way.
“Sleep well and have pleasant dreams.” I said with a kind, gentle voice the kind that usually calmed him when he was upset over something.
“Yeah.” He mumbled walking out of the room running his hand through his hair. It was a movement that signified that he was frustrated. He did it when we were working on the computers at the hospital when we first became friends. Maybe he won’t be so angry with me in the morning. He would be much more angry if he knew that I wanted him.
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