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From: R J DAWS0N

Date: 30 Dec 1998 17:35:37 GMT

Subject: *NEW* Being Scully (1/1)

Title - Being Scully

Author -Brandi

E-Mail address -R J (the 0 in Dawson is a zero)

Archive: Anywhere but keep my name on it.

Rating -PG

Category -S/R/H/Scully's POV

Spoilers -tiny one for FTF and big ones for Triangle Keywords -Post Triangle Fic, Mulder/Scully Romance Summary -Is Scully Having a nervous breakdown? Her thoughts after the episode.

Disclaimer-Mulder and Scully are mine...wait those are action figures.Damn. Okay the REAL Mulder and Scully belong to Chris Carter, David and Gillian, 1013 Productions, and Fox. No copyright infringement intended. Feedback: I don't beg but PULEASE!

Author's Notes: I wrote this right after Triangle was on but I have been really busy with finals and Christmas so I just now got around to posting

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Being Scully By. R J DAWS0N

I have never been more confused in my life. I don't think anyone has ever swept me off my feet while in a delusional state. Take Mulder to be the first. "I love you." I could have fainted right there, and I, Dana "Queen of Fine" Scully, am not the fainting type. That was 20 minutes ago, now driving back to the hotel I am thoroughly confused. Was the "I love you: just the pain- killers talking or were the painkillers allowing him to talk? This is giving me a headache. Finally the hotel. I have never been more happy to be at one. Like just being here with ever stop these thoughts. Thoughts I shouldn't be having. Thoughts I had under control. Thoughts I- I should have aimed lower when I shot him. What really pisses me off is I"m the one who has to think about this. I'm the one who has to reason the hell out of this. He gets to have drug-induced dreams where he doesn't have to think about anything. Lucky bastard. I'm having a nervous breakdown. I really am. And its all his fault. He has got to stop telling me wonderful things like that. If he doesn't I might be forced to do something rash him. Dear god...I have never wanted to be rash until this moment. "Miss Scully? You have a message." The bellboy shakes me from my thoughts. Great a message from the hospital asking me to call. I swear if he isn't doing what he is told I'm going to kick his ass. I pick up the phone. "Yes this is Special Agent Dana Scully. My partner Fox Mulder is in the ICU there. I was left a message. Is there a problem?" "No Mr. Mulder had woke up and we moved him to a regular room. We just wanted to notify you. Room 1013. Here I'll ring you through." She doesn't even wait for an answer from me. As much as I don't want to talk to him at this moment, I can't put down the phone. "Hello?" His voice is low and sleepy. I can tell he was asleep. "Hey, I was just checking up on you. They said they moved you. How are you feeling?" I put on my best Dr. Scully voice. I hate that voice. I wish I got to use the BestFriend!Scully voice more often. It makes him smile. And I do live to see him smile. "Were you asleep?" "Almost, but I was just thinking really." "About?" "You" My heart has definitely stopped. "Did they take you off the painkillers?" I'm really not trying to change the subject. I plan to get right back on that. But I need to be sure he's thinking clearly. "Yep, I'm officially IV free. Just tylenol now." "So, you want to tell me what really happened out there?" "I told you Scully. I was on the boat. It was 1939. The boat was stuck in a time warp...It was weird, all the people looked like people I know. Cancerman, Spender, Skinner, they were all Nazi's. And were there, but it wasn't you." "Mulder that doesn't make any sense." Okay maybe he wasn't delusional. Maybe he really has finally lost it. Or maybe he's just being Mulder. "I know it doesn't. But its true. The girl, the one that was you, she save everyone...she saved us. I wish you could have been there. She looked just like you except she was dressed up in 30's glamour. God, she was beautiful." he thinks that she was me, then that means he thinks that I am- I have got to stop thinking. "Well, the 2nd most beautiful woman I've met." If he dares to say Flat-faced Fowley is the first I'll hunt him down....but I can't resist the urge to ask: "Who's the first?" "She could never be first because even if she looks exactly like you. She could never be you. That's what makes you the most beautiful. Just being Scully." I am at the moment standing in a hotel room in Florida in Flannel pj bottoms, a long sleeve T-shirt way too big for me that I'm pretty sure is his, and in socks with holes on the bottoms. But I am the most beautiful woman alive. " think I'm beautiful?" Where the hell did that little voice come from? I have never sounded like that before. "Of course. I always have." He's doing it again. He's saying things that make me want to kiss him....Did I ever tell you that I love it when he does that? "Mulder..we need to talk." "Good or bad?" "I think good, but please lets not wait until one of us is leaving or on painkillers this time." "They said I could go home tomorrow." "So you can come stay at my house on the couch and I'll rent movies and take a few days off. And we can talk." "I'd love that." "Ok, I'll be there in the morning. You'll know me, I'll be the only beautiful FBI agent with a cinnamon raisin bagel and coffee with your name on it. " A woman after my own heart." Actually I think that I have his heart. The same as he has mine. "Well go to sleep and I'll see you then." Good the Best Friend voice came out and not the doctor. I can almost picture his smile. "Goodnite Mulder." "Sweet dreams Scully." "Mulder?" "Hmmm?" "I love you, too." ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

THE END December 30, 1998 Brandi