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Top Ten Life-Lessons Bill Gates has Learned

10. Money really CAN buy happiness.

9. All the riches in the world can't buy good fashion sense.

8. Buying a popular encyclopedia, filling it full of propaganda and calling it "Encarta" does little to help your reputation, considering the majority of the American public don't read.

7. Lying is much easier once you get rid of your conscience.

6. Turns out the Internet may indeed be catching on.

5. If you swipe someone's idea, repackage it as your own, and give it away for free, people might be mad.

4. Daily hair combing slows the growth of lice.

3. Naming your company "Microsoft" opens you up to all sorts of crude jokes.

2. Rolling around naked in $100 bills is no substitute for showering.

1. Th Sultan of Brunei gets mighty testy when you beat him at poker.

Brought to you by the Palm IIIe: "you'll never wonder whether you threw out the sticky or not!"