"The Amazing Purple Emu Who Speaks Ebonics"

by the Blanks

Part IX

When we last left our heroes, they all thought Mark was Da Stuff. They all assumed that they all was right as usual, and thus also thought Mark was Da Stuff. To their great dismay, the Stuff-Sniffing-Snachez announced, "Not Stuff this dude is." Continuing to Sniff Mark more vigorously, the Stuff-Sniffing-Sanchez eventually came to a conclusion, which he shared with everyone, "Stuff this dude is not. Stuff does this dude have."

Sara sat down.

Mark said, "Dude."

Sara stood up.

aLi smiled.

They all took Sara's ritalin from Mark. The amazing purple emu that speaks ebonics flew over and took Sara's ritalin from they all. At the exact moment when aLi began to rejoice at the amazing purple emu that speaks ebonics's departure from her head, it realized that emi can not fly and realighted in precisely the same spot it had previously occupied on aLi's head.

The amazing purple emu that speaks ebonics said, "Now I gots Da Stuff. Now I be able to complete my plan to take over the world. This be phat!"

They all looked at the amazing purple emu that speaks ebonics.

They all looked at the amazing purple emu that speaks ebonics.

***

Why does the amazing purple emu want to take over the world? And how does he possibly hope to accompish that goal using ritalin? And why have the past few parts been so short?

***

aLi said, "That part was too short! Write more you stupid Blanks!"

They did.

***

In an effort to lengthen this part, the Blanks are now going to have the amazing purple emu that speaks ebonics make the classic bad-guy blunder of telling our heroes his lengthy and complicated plot.

***

I like asterisks.

***

aLi said, "I like asterisks too."

"Who are you talking to old chum?" emanated from the midsection of the amazing purple emu that speaks ebonics.

aLi just smiled the aLi-smile embarassedly.

Sara sat down.

Sara played spit with an asterisk.

Mark said, "Dude."

Sara beat the asterisk at spit. It sucked.

Sara stood up.

Sara walked in, "IlikeasteriskstooTheyarealotoffuntoplayspitwithbuttheysuckcausetheyresoslow andImmuchfasterthanthembutthatsbecauseIdonthavemyritalinsoImreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreallyreally reallyreallyreallyreallyreallyhyperandIwantmyritalinWheresmyritalinWheresmyritalinWheresmyritalin..."

As Sara continued to babble hyperactively, the amazing purple emu that speaks ebonics said, "I got yo ritalin foo, and I be takin over the world with it. My plan be almost complete. You be not bein able to stop me now."

However, the amazing purple emu that speaks ebonics had underestimated the abilities of a hyperactive Sara under the effects of ritalin-withdrawal. While continuing to babble incessantly, she ran up to aLi, took her ritalin, and ran away before the amazing purple emu that speaks ebonics could say, "Yo mama a punk!"

***

Will Sara survive even though she got her ritalin back? Will the amazing purple emu that speaks ebonics kill her or will she foil his evil plan? And what ever happened to That Big Hollow Tree?

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