Dreams and Poetry....
I've been having strange and pleasurable dreams lately. Nothing sexual, but nice dreams. One about my boyfriend. Although we didn't have sex in the dream, we were very close to each other, and the feeling of closeness and love was there.

I do feel close to him and I do love him. I hope that someday we can get very close to each other and feel comfortable and want to be with each other all the time. Not that I'm saying he doesn't want to be near me all the time, for I don't know what he feels about this. But I would love to be near him all the time.

I'm getting caught up in my poetry. I would like to be in a goth metal band someday, vocalist, and I've begun taking an interest in writing songs. Really, though, Dani Davey's lyrics motivate me. He is such a poet. You should go read his lyrics now. In fact, do that, I'll wait here. Go on.

So anyway, yeah. Poetry and dreams. Love it.

xXx Courtney xXx

Black Lipstick and Claire's.....
So. I am here right now. Yep.

The anger is aflame no longer, for I'm in a... wait, I'm not really in a mood at all. Nevermind that.

So anyway, I'm beginning to get to that stage where I'm like: "If I want to be recognized as a gothic of some sort, I'm going to have to wear some lipstick." So I boldly took out my lipstick and spread that stuff on my lips, went to the mall, and had the greatest time of my life... or somewhere near that.

Anyhow, I really did feel good. And by the way, I don't really believe in labels, but people consider me gothic while I consider myself not gothic enough to BE gothic. ^_^;; confusing, no?

So then we (my sister, cousin and best friend Amber) strolled about the mall, viewing gothic dudes and prissy girls. We went into Claire's, and for those who do not know of this store, it is full of popular pink girly stuff I suppose. But there IS a section off to the farthest corner (how convenient) that has spiked bracelets, jelly bracelets, flame stuff, chokers, collar, etc.

So I found this hat on a rack next to this Corner of Doom (now I wonder if they put this stuff in the corner so that the other girls won't be scared..). Have you ever seen Britney Spears' tan sparkling hat that has a short bill and is kinda mushroom-shaped? Well, this was the same, except it was black and silky instead of tan and sparkly leather.

I LOVE IT. I will admit now and forever more that Claire's DOES have good stuff sometimes. The store I DO NOT like is Rave... grr... can't find any good poet shirts in there...

Anyway, enough ranting and raving fer now.

xXxCourtneyxXx

And the anger is aflame...
I'm not in a good mood at the moment being, and here's why: my other blog is suddenly inaccessable because I forgot my password. So I've been forced to create a whole new freaking blog.

Anyway, onto other issues of mine...

I'm beginning to think that my sister is devoid of any human emotion. If she sees our baby sister (of two years) fall down or smack her face on something, she'll sit there and watch her cry.

And if she does something to hurt somebody's feelings or anything, she'll say she's sorry without any feeling in her eyes. Her eyes are always BLANK unless she's feeling sorry for herself.

Somebody else pointed this out to me and I;ve realized that this is most definitely true. My sister is a selfish robot, only seeking for her own pleasures even at the expense of others.

I don't like her much.

xXxCourtney RenayxXx