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Welcome to the REAL Gross Dachshund Division.
The REAL
Grossdachshund clan are a World War 2 gaming team, dedicated to fighting
DICKtators everywhere - oh - and throwing ourselves on hand grenades.
We splintered from the hated UberDickCheeseFuhrer of The
GrossDachshund Division aka Doctor Jeep in November 2002 due to his
megalomaniacal tendencies and his inability to communicate without
inserting a rather large knife into your back at the same time. RGD
stands for true gaming values, where all clan members are
equal and a democratic system of fairness to all reigns. RGD stands
for the initial values of Grossdachshund - Gaming, Spamming and
having a laugh online - values which, sadly, the original (and still
the worst) Grossdachshund clan now fail at miserably. Our team of
highly trained operatives can be found playing SSF, SS2, MOHAA and
any other WW2 -based game you can imagine - 24/7!
You can
find our members out there playing Sudden Strike, Sudden Strike 2,
Blitzkrieg, Medal of Honour, Wolfenstein, and (more probably)
looking at dubious websites appertaining to Donkey Porn
;)
FEATURES
Sudden Strike Forever Multiplayer
Strategy Guide
Are you
SHITE at SSF? Do you keep getting TRASHED when you play online? Are
you a NOOBS who needs all the Goddam Help he can Get? Look no
further my son - RGD's SSF Multiplayer Survival Guide is all you
need....
Sudden Strike
Forever Maps Archive
For all the SSF Multiplayer maps you will ever need - reviewed and
rated by the RGD experts!
Railwayman's Good Beer Guide 2003
There really is NOTHING like a delicious cool beer to drink as you
annihilate your opponents - Our resident expert RGD Railwayman
pints (sic) you in the right direction for your vittles....
BULLETIN SECTION
Posted by Sick Puppy
2nd June 2003
The new material continues to be spewed forth from the RGD HQ
Bunker! Check out our latest page from the indominatable
Octogenarian RGD Railwayman! His
Good Beer Guide is now available for your viewing pleasure. Rail
has over 300 years of experience in the subject and is our resident
expert on all things alcoholic - unlike RGD Major Clanger who just
is alcoholic :)
On a sadder note RGD Failed to beat BEST clan in the league last
night - Unlucky lads - and well played BEST.
29th May 2003
Another page added today - check out the
RGD Sudden Strike Forever Maps
Page for some of the finest multiplayer maps currently
available. Download em to avoid that crappy map download wait
in-game and try them out against some piggies. More coming soon!
Look out in the near future for the RGD HALL OF HORRORS - disgusting
pictures of the stinking RGD clan in all their not very
gloriousness!
27th May 2003
Just a quickie - our first feature page is up and running - take a
look at our Sudden Strike
Forever Strategy Guide - a must for all NOOBS and
those of you out there who REALLY SUCK AT SSF!
Have a look at the tippety-topermost tips from RGD's finest SSF
players - it could change your game and make you a winner - or we
could just be spouting BOLLOCKS - you decide...
24th May 2003
Whoah - a MASSIVE 12 HITS so far and we aint even been up a week
yet!!! The last few days have seen RGD players practising like F**K
on the Clan League Map to hone their skills for this Sunday's match
against DD Clan (our favourite Bra Size too!). Aside from this
BLITZKRIEG is at last released in the UK! It's a marvellous 3D
RTS which is obviously derived from Sudden Strike Forever and Sudden
Strike 2 - although thankfully the gameplay is geared more towards
Forever. At 1027 X 768 Resolution it looks BLOODY GORGEOUS - even
better at 1600 X 1200 - the tanks are finely detailed and the
scenery and battlefield are stunning. Your Shermans leave tank
tracks on the ground as they charge into battle and you can even see
the smoke billowing from the cannon barrels as they fire. First
impressions of gameplay are good - the single player game is
excellent with an impressive array of units to be upgraded in bonus
missions and experience being gained as your units advance through
the scenarios. Just as in Sudden Strike 2 certain units like the
JagdPanther and Ferdinand are insanely hard to kill with anything
other than a shot to the rear bouncing off their armour. We like a
bit of realism though - bear in mind General Omar Bradley's words:
"If your up against a Tiger send 10 Shermans to beat it - and expect
9 of them to never come back..."
Haven't had much chance to try out the Multiplayer side of the game
yet but if it's as good as SSF we'll be MORE THAN HAPPY! Look out
for definitive reviews, tips and downloads for all RGD's favourite
games COMING SOON!
On a slightly more downbeat note PAINMASTER has been crying
into his TENNANTS this week as Celtic crashed out of the UEFA
Cup Final beaten 3-2 by FC Porto. Our resident CULTURE VULTURE
and all-round NICE-GUY was gutted bless im - If you come
across him in game DON'T MENTION THE PORTUGUESE!!!! Your likely to
get a virtual Fat Lip.
Peace.
19th May 2003
RGD Website now online - Many
areas under construction due to pilfering of pages from GD and
subsequent Decontamination procedures. Keep your eyes peeled for the
updated features of our site - COMING SOON!
RGD MEMBERS
These dudes are the most ornery, low down, highly
skilled Spammers you will ever meet - APPROACH WITH
CAUTION!
Name
Position
Speciality
RGD Major
Clanger
Recruitment
Drinking Vodka
RGD
VonEselSchwanz
SS2
Manager
Pain's Mama
RGD Sick
Puppy
Tactical
Officer
Sheep
RGD
RAILWAYMAN
Propaganda
Beer
RGD
Toe
Morale
Officer
Star Trek
RGD Mr
Cheese
"69"
SSF Wizard
RGD
Painmaster
Culture
Secretary
Esel's Mama
RGD
Haggisman
Doggy
Style
Conversation
RGD Haunted
Mind
Foreign
Relations
SSF Genius
CLAN NAME UP IN AIR?!
At the time of
writing a FURIOUS DEBATE is being raged at RGD HQ - The High Command
has deemed it necessary to change the name of the clan (as we feel
ANY ASSOCIATION with the spuriously unattractive GD Clan is HIGHLY
INAPPROPRIATE). The twisted mind of a certain VonEselSchwanz is
mulling over possibilities as you read this - OMG! Odds on the new
name will be WITTY, with more that a little PIZZAZZ, and also HIGHLY
OFFENSIVE! Cool.
UKSTRIKE
CLAN LEAGUE
As of Sunday 18th May RGD have gloriously won 4 out of
12 League games - most notably a STUNNING victory over the PUNY GD
CLAN Muahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! You can find us
practising FURIOUSLY on the League Map most nights (Even though
there is F**K All Chance of us getting in to the top half of the
table!) Point Your Browser at WWW.UKSTRIKE.CO.UK/ for
details of the SSF Clan League (And P**S Yourself Laughing because
GD haven't won a game yet!).
BEER AND FIGHTING - The only two things worth bothering
with!
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