My LiFE
25th May 2003
Today is a new chapter in life for me. I have just broken up with my boyfriend of 4 long years yesterday. I am really heartbroken, becuz it happened totally unexpectedly. I'll start at the beginning of our relationship to tell u guys what happened..
I went steady with him (let's just use his initials, E) on 19th April 1999. My close friend introduced me to E. At that time he worked part time at a cyber cafe, and we were there to just use the computer to chat on IRC.
The first time I saw him, i straightaway asked him,"Were u one of my mom's ex-student?" My mom used to be a primary school teacher. E looked so familiar that it's scary. It's like I've known him before. Like in the past life or sumthing. He answered,"No. U look familiar. Have I seen u before?".. So we talked that nite. We realised that we are on the same class together in college! He then realised that he had seen me before in class. So since that day, we got even more close. He'd always seem to be with me. It's a bit weird, since I had found out that he's got a gf in another state, studying.
Time passed by. Day by day, I could see that he began to like me. And then suddenly, he asked me out one day! I was esctatic! But on that day, I wondered cuz he seem to not be like himself. Then I found out, his gf left him for another guy. No wonder. But at the same time, he told me he likes me.
On my friends bday, 19th April 1999, we went to the cybercafe where he worked. while my friend surfed the net, I was talking to E. He then suddenly pulled me to the restroom. Guess what he asked me there. To be his gf!! Right in the restroom! He said,"I like you. Would u be my gf?". Before I had the chance to answer, he then changed his mind, saying,"Forget it. I know u'll never accept me anyway". So I stopped him, and accepted him. He was sooo happy, he hugged me there! I admit I felt like I was in heaven too! Pure bliss! At last he asked me to be his gf!
So day by day we got even more closer. I even lost my virginity to him eventually. But not so soon. Maybe like in a few months. We were inseperable! Everybody says that we look good together.
Ok, I'll fast forward to the problem part. So time passed by. He would control my freedom. I mean in a sense of not to even look at another guy. And not to have any form of relationship with any other guy. Not even friends. So basically, I had no friends in college, except for the ones in his group. But at the same time, he can talk to any girl he wants and not feel guilty about it, even though he knows that I would feel jealous bout it, just as he would if I talk to other guys. He has always been this, carefree guy, not caring bout other girls' feelings, and would flirt with them without even realising it. But I know he worships the ground I walk on.
But the first time we had an argument, it ended up with us breaking up.. or rather just cooling off. He went to Brunei to see his family. He accused me of being over possesive of him. I dunno if tell him not to flirt with other girls possesive. I was heartbroken. I begged him to take me back. Eventually he did. I told him I'd try to change. But if only he'd change. So then we got back together.
Then his best friend from Brunei came here and stayed with him and his family. At this time, his family had all moved to here now, and no longer in Brunei. E doesn't want me to be close to his best friend, fearing that he'd make a move on me. Which I think is stupid. He'd always bring out his close friend Y, who likes him, and E along. Now E here is with them just for the transport sake. Y is so in love with E's best friend, V, that E suggested that he would pretend to be Y's bf, to make V jealous. But at the same time, E didn't tell me of this plan. So 1 day I found Y's pic on E's wallet. We had a huge argument on why he's got her pic and kept on removing mine. He told me the reason, and so being the weak hearted that I am, I forgave him. But still I didn't have a chance to talk to Y, cuz E never did introduced me to her, which leaves me very dissatisfied. But oh well.
