"It's so good to be home," Orli sighs.
"You've been saying that for three days," I say with a grin.
"That's because it's true. Fuck Vig, I haven't been home in *four* months. Do you know how crazy that's made me?"
"Hopefully no crazier than you already are," I tease.
"Wanker."
"Orli, that insult carries no weight whatsoever. Now that you're home, I never need to 'wank'."
He blushes all the way to his ears. "Um, yeah. Well, then just be quiet."
"Of course, dear," I snicker. "Whatever you say."
"You are such a cunt!" he laughs, picking up a piece of pineapple and lobbing it at me. It hits me square in the face and I manage to catch it before it falls to the ground. "At this rate, I'm going back to Mexico."
"I'll behave," I promise, putting my hands up to signal a truce. "Just stop throwing fruit at me."
We're standing out on the patio, setting up the food for the pool party we've decided to throw for no real reason. The Astin family will be coming, as will Lij, Dom, Liv, and Karl, who's now living in L.A. for a while. Henry's also here, and I told him he could invite his girlfriend if he wanted to -- which meant that he could explain to her about me and Orli. It was a decision that Orli and I had come to when I visited him in Mexico, since I had met Henry's girlfriend and thought she was a very nice girl who could be trusted; I also knew that my son wouldn't do anything that would put his family's privacy in jeopardy.
"That's everything," Orli declares as he puts down the last platter of salad that I picked up from the deli this morning. "Well, everything that *we're* supplying. You said that Sean and Christine are bringing the desserts?"
"Yeah, and Lij is bringing the drinks." I stand back to survey the area. "Okay, the pool is cleaned, the food is set up, the house is . . . reasonably presentable. I think we're about ready for people to start arriving."
"It's already after one, so people will start arriving soon whether we're ready for them or not," he tells me with a grin. "C'mon, let's go back into the house."
I'm lazing around on the couch a few minutes later, watching Orli get great enjoyment out of playing with Maude, when the first car pulls into our driveway. Henry immediately comes flying down the hall, no doubt hoping it's his girlfriend, but he doesn't look very disappointed when he opens the door to see Dom and Lij standing there holding two coolers. "Hobbits!" he cries in greeting.
"Henry!" Lij exclaims, putting his cooler down and hugging my son. And so it begins.
Two minutes after Dom and Lij arrive, the Astin family gets there. Sean and Christine usher Allie and little Elizabeth out to the pool; the girls are already decked out in bathing suits and high-powered sunscreen. Karl and Liv show up next, then Henry's girlfriend is finally dropped off by her mother (much to my son's relief).
"So Dad, you remember Jemila," Henry says.
I smile at her. "Of course. It's nice to see you again. Come on out back, everyone's already swimming and having lunch."
"Great," she says with a grin. "Thanks so much for inviting me."
"Oh, it's my pleasure."
We go out to the backyard/patio area, where it's already a zoo of activity. Orli immediately spies us and walks over. Time for my son's girlfriend to meet my boyfriend. Yes, it's the modern family at its best. "Jemila, this is Orli," Henry tells her. "He's my dad's boyfriend."
"Nice to meet you," she chirps. "I know I probably sound like an idiot, but you really *were* cool as Legolas."
"It's nice to meet you, too," Orli laughs. "And thank you; you don't sound like an idiot. Henry's told me a lot about you, and he's never given any indication that you could be an idiot."
Jemila blushes at the realization that Henry has talked about her to Orlando Bloom, and I have to stifle a grin. "You wanna go swimming?" Henry asks his girlfriend. His girlfriend. My son has a girlfriend. It's been months and I'm still getting used to that concept. Ugh, I have to get with the program. The two of them go off to the pool, and I'm left with Orli, who looks like he's fighting back laughter.
"What?" I ask.
"I think Henry has his first love. How cute is that?"
"It makes me feel old," I grumble.
"Oh, stop it," he laughs. "You aren't old."
"Orli! Viggo!" We look over towards the pool as we hear our names called by Allie Astin. "Come swim!"
"Yeah, get your butts over here!" Lij calls.
"You're being lousy hosts, huddling by yourselves," Karl adds.
"Lousy hosts?!" Orli cries, pretending to be insulted. He's already down to just his swimsuit, so he runs across the patio and does a cannonball into the middle of the pool, creating a gigantic splash. Allie laughs and screams, swimming over to him and trying to get a piggy-back ride. I opt to sit on the edge of the pool, dangling my feet in the water and talking with Liv while we watch everyone else enjoy themselves.
"So how long has Orli been back?" she asks as she pulls her hair into a bun.
"Three blissful days."
She smiles. "And now you guys have nothing planned for the rest of the year? Just time with each other?"
"Exactly."
"Well, you deserve that. The two of you have been separated so much over these last few years that it's really about time for you to sit back and relax." She looks at Orli playing some demented water game with Henry and Jemila. "And it certainly seems like he's built a solid career so far. His movie did incredibly well this summer."
"I know," I chuckle. "He wasn't quite prepared for the whole 'fame' trip."
"Nobody can really be prepared for it," Liv says sympathetically. "Least of all Orli, who's just *so* sweet."
"He's pretty sweet," I agree. "But he got incredibly stressed over everything this summer -- the tabloids, the rumors, the fans, the publicity. It's way too much sometimes. I'm amazed that he's stayed the same nice, funny, down-to-earth guy that he's always been. It says a lot about him."
"He also has a bunch of people who'd kick his butt if he started getting all high and mighty," Liv giggles.
"Yes, there's also that."
"And how are you doing?"
"Me? I'm great. Orli's home, school's going to start for Henry in a few weeks, and not much else is happening."
"So it's nice and quiet?"
"Yeah." I smile, looking back at Orli enjoying himself with everyone. "Just the way we like it."
*****
"Daddy, I need another cookie!"
"Allie, I just gave you two cookies," Sean tells his daughter tiredly.
"Maude took them," Allie says, pointing at our dog. Uh oh.
"She stole *more* food?" Henry laughs. "That's, like, the twelfth thing she's taken today!"
"And she took the cookies right off of my plate!" Allie exclaims indignantly.
"Bad dog," Orli scolds. "Very bad Maude! You know better than that, sweetie."
"Doesn't calling her 'sweetie' contradict the scolding?" Dom asks.
"You try being harsh with this girl," Orli says. It's true -- when Maude looks at you with those big brown eyes, it's very difficult to stay angry with her. She must have learned that trick from Orli.
"Come on Maude, let's go *inside*," I tell the dog, urging her through the screen door. "No more stolen cookies for you. That's very bad behavior for a doggie." She just whimpers and gives me her best I'm-such-an-adorable-dog look. "Nice try. Stay in here."
"The dog is a bit of a kleptomaniac," Orli explains to Christine as Sean hands Allie another cookie. "But only when it comes to food."
"And the cat likes to destroy things," Henry adds. "We have very mischievous pets. There's never a dull moment here. Like once, Pokey got into a fight with the remote control and the TV ended up stuck on the weather channel. It took us an hour to figure out how to fix it."
"It's good to know that your pets' insanity rivals your own," Karl tells us with a grin.
"I'll have you know that we are perfectly sane," Orli huffs.
"No, we're really not," I laugh.
"Hey, Orli," Dom says suddenly with a grin. "I think it's time."
"Yeah?" he asks, looking very devious. "Okay, now!"
The two of them start running and then grab Liv, literally picking her up despite her shrieks of protest. As the rest of us stare in disbelief, Dom and Orli carry her over to the pool and drop her into the water. "There," Dom says satisfactorily. "Now everyone's been in the pool today."
"You jerks!" Liv yells when she surfaces again. "You're gonna pay for this, you crazy freaks!" She hoists herself out of the pool, kicks off her shoes, and starts chasing after Dom and Orli, assisted by Allie, who thinks it was viciously unfair for poor Liv to have been ambushed like that.
"Hobbit solidarity!" Lij hollers as he tackles Liv, pinning her to the grass. The two of them start laughing as they play-wrestle, and the conflict is apparently over.
Orli makes his way back to my side, now free from the danger of an angry Liv Tyler, and wraps an arm around my waist. "And they call *us* insane?"
"You were the one who threw her in the pool," I remind him.
"It was Dom's idea," he tells me with a grin.
"That doesn't mean you had to go along with it."
"Come on, Viggo -- tell me it wasn't funny."
I can't help but chuckle. "You're crazy, elf boy."
"But it was funny," he persists.
"Yes, it was pretty funny," I admit. "And amazingly enough, it didn't scare away Henry's girlfriend."
"Well, she's been dating your mad boy for seven months, so I doubt that an afternoon with us would freak her out," Orli says.
"Very good point," I laugh.
As we watch our friends having fun, he kisses me on the cheek and smiles. "I know I've said it before, but I have to say it again, Vig."
"You're glad to be home?"
"Yeah."
I grin. "I'm glad you're home, too."
