I grin as I sift through the photos Viggo's taken so far. The one of Lij with the snow on his hair is nice, but my favorite is the one of Beanie leaning back against me in the Khazad-Dum set, trying not to laugh as I hug him. "This is the best one," I tell him.
"Oh yeah? I like this one." He holds up another picture of Bean, resting on the ground with his eyes closed. "I really hate that he's leaving next week."
"Me, too." I kiss his neck. "Wanna go to bed?"
He chuckles, and I feel the vibrations against my lips. "I was going to do some painting."
"I have needs, Viggo," I tell him, kissing him more firmly.
"Young people today," he says with a sigh.
"Yeah, well this one's throwing himself at your sorry ass, so forget the painting."
"Give me an hour, Orli," he says, breaking away from my embrace and standing up. "I really feel a need to paint tonight."
"You don't pay attention to me," I pout. Of course, that's bullshit; he's the most loving, attentive man I know.
He rolls his eyes. "You *know* that's not true, love. I paid a lot of attention to you this morning, if you recall."
"Well, can I at least hang out while you paint?"
"Of course," he says with a smile, kissing me.
*****
As I watch him bring a brush to the canvas, I bite my lip impatiently. "It's been an hour and ten minutes," I inform him.
Viggo sighs and turns around. "I'm almost done. You can't time inspiration, Orli; when it comes to me, I need to get it out."
"Pretentious artist," I say, and he laughs.
"That's me, alright."
"Viggo," I whine. "C'mon. Bed."
"Orli," he says patiently, turning to look at me. "Please, just a few more minutes."
"Fine," I sulk. "I'll go see if the hobbits are busy tonight."
"Love, you knew I wanted to paint tonight; I told you that this afternoon."
"Seriously, Vig," I say, standing and walking over to him. "Finish it tomorrow." I take the paintbrush from his hand and place it on the table.
"Orlando." His voice is steely. "I'm finishing this tonight."
"What's the matter, old man? Can't get it up for me?"
"Jesus Christ, Orli, will you stop being such a fucking *child* for one minute? Grow up, okay? Not everything's about *you*."
The only sound in the small room is our breathing, and I feel rooted to the floor. "A child?" I finally say, my voice dangerously low.
Viggo shakes his head. "Orli, I didn't –"
"Fuck off," I say angrily, grabbing my jumper. "I'm going to stay at Elijah's tonight."
"Orlando, listen to me."
"No, I'm going to hang out with the other children." Slamming the door behind me, I get into the car, dropping the keys three times before I get them into the ignition.
*****
"Who the fuck is it?" Lij asks merrily after I pound on the door.
"Orli."
Opening the door, he frowns at me. "Christ, you look like shit, man."
"You really know how to cheer someone up, Lij," I say, pushing past him and dropping down on the couch.
"What's wrong, Orli?" Billy asks, his accent thickened from undoubtedly drinking a bit too much. Dom doesn't even look up as he reviews the script, but Sean A. looks at me with concern. "You and your boyfriend have a tiff?" Billy laughs.
"Is the honeymoon over?" Lij asks with a grin.
"You guys think this is funny?" I shout. The tears fall before I can stop them; I've managed to make it this far without crying, so maybe I should just let it happen.
"Guys, shut up," Sean says as he hands me a napkin to wipe my eyes. "Don't listen to these idiots, Orli. Just tell me what happened."
"Christ, it's my fault."
"What is?" he asks gently.
"Viggo wanted to paint tonight, and I wanted him to . . . well, go to bed." I blush.
"You can say you wanted to have sex, Orli, it doesn't bother us," Lij says, his smile now comforting rather than irritating. Dom has joined us, sitting on the table in front of the couch.
"And I was behaving like a tosser about it. I mean, I really was, you know? Just pushing him, and annoying him. Most of the time, we have fun with that, he enjoys the banter, but tonight, I was just getting on his nerves."
"Did you say something stupid?" Billy asks me with a sympathetic smile.
"Of course. Look at who you're talking to. But nothing really bad. I just teased him that he doesn't pay attention to me, which isn't true. I was whining, and pouting, and we both knew it was an act."
"So what happened?"
"I don't know. I took the brush from his hand, and he got pissed. Then I teased him, asking if he didn't want to come to bed because he couldn't get it up. You know, called him 'old man', which is usually a twisted term of endearment between us, but I guess it was just one taunt too many for one night."
Sean winces. "Yeah, that probably wasn't a good idea."
"But then he just snapped. I mean, you guys know that Viggo
doesn't get yell, it's just not who he is; but he yelled at me. Told
me to stop being a child and grow up. That everything's not about
me."
Dom sighs and takes my hand. "He didn't mean it, Orli. You know he wouldn't have you any other way."
"Thanks, Sblomie, but he meant it. I don't blame him for saying it, either. I mean, I *was* being immature, and it's not the first time I have been. Maybe the age thing really is a problem."
"Don't say that," Sean says firmly. "This was a stupid fight. Every couple fights about little shit, and things get said that people don't mean."
"Did he apologize?" Billy asks.
"He tried to. I just left. Which I'm sure didn't help my argument that I'm not immature."
"Orli, the fact that he wanted to apologize means he realized he was wrong," Sean tells me.
"But what if he's not? I mean, he said something yesterday offhand that I didn't even think about until I was driving over here."
"What'd he say?"
"We were talking about the fact that Beanie's leaving, and he was saying that now he'd have no one to hang out with when I go to the clubs with you guys. Not in an accusatory manner, just a statement of fact. And I didn't even say that maybe he should come along with me, or that I'd cut back on the clubs if he felt lonely. He doesn't like the clubs, he doesn't like bungee-jumping, and the one time we tried surfing, it was a disaster."
"None of that really matters, you know," Lij says, handing me another napkin to blow my nose. "What matters is that when you guys *are* together, you're happy. If the two of you spent every waking minute together, and shared every interest, that would be kind of weird."
"Elijah's right," Dom says. "You guys both need time to yourselves as well as with each other. When you're together, does the age thing come up a lot?"
"No. It doesn't feel like an issue. I mean, he's never turned to me and said, 'hey Orli, let's reminisce about the Vietnam War.'"
Sean laughs. "And when Henry came, I know you didn't feel weird about the fact you're dating a forty-one-year-old dad."
"True."
"Look, why don't you just get some sleep and talk to him tomorrow. It's almost midnight, and the couch is comfy," Lij says.
I just nod and try to smile at them. After being covered in blankets by my friends, I run a hand through my mohawk and sigh. Sleep just isn't an option tonight.
*****
I walk into the Cuntebago and Bean grins at me as he hands me some coffee. "God, Orlando, you look as bad as Viggo this morning. Rough night?"
"Leave me alone," I say softly.
Sean turns to the makeup girl. "Can you give us a minute, Thea?" She nods and scurries out of the trailer. "Okay, what's going on?"
"I said to leave me alone."
"Look, you're both my friends, and if something's wrong –"
"Jesus fucking Christ, Sean! Leave me alone!"
"Sean." I look up as I see Viggo enter the trailer, his voice even quieter than usual. "Would you mind?"
He looks at us, almost assessing whether or not we should be left alone, but finally nods. "Yeah, alright. But don't take too long; we have to get ready."
After Sean leaves, Viggo sits down in the chair next to me, and I can see how miserable he looks. One of his hands reaches up and takes the finger I'm gnawing on nervously. "Don't do that," he says softly.
"Viggo, I'm sorry about last night."
"Orli –"
"No, just let me talk, okay?" At his nod, I take a deep breath. "Look, you're right I can be a real child a lot of the time. And last night, I just . . . well, I don't know why I behaved like such an arse, but I did, and I'm so sorry. There are times when I can't believe that you're with me, Vig. I mean, I'm nowhere near as intelligent and thoughtful as you are, and I *am* a kid, and I sometimes think you'd be happier with someone like Sean; someone your age."
"Love –"
"And if you want me to change, to grow up, I can. I'll stop teasing you, I won't call you old man, or any of that. I won't spend so much time with the hobbits, or bungee-jumping –"
"Orli, shut up," he says, but he's smiling.
"I'm sorry, Viggo. I was a wanker last night."
"Well, I was an asshole. I didn't mean what I said; I just lost it, and that's not like me."
"I know."
"Orlando, I don't want you to change. You're so enthusiastic about everything, but that doesn't make you a child. Yes, you were annoying the piss out of me last night, however that can't justify what I said. And don't you dare grow up any faster than you have to. Believe me, being jaded and cynical isn't as much fun as it looks."
"So you don't think I'm just an immature kid?"
He laughs. "You have a better head on your shoulders than I do half the time. Orli, what we have is special, and we wouldn't have gotten this far if either one of us was immature. And saying that you're not as intelligent and thoughtful as I am is pure bullshit. Yes, you're still a kid in some ways; you're only twenty-two, and I know your perspective on certain things is bound to be different than mine. But to tell you the truth, that's one thing I love about our relationship. And if you think you're insecure, half the time I'm terrified you're going to wake up and wonder what you're doing with a middle-aged guy like me."
"That will never happen," I tell him firmly.
"Promise?" The laughter of a moment ago is gone, and he looks at me with such openness that I feel my heart clench.
"I promise. Now, can we agree that the age thing shouldn't come between us?"
"There you go, being all mature again," he says with a small grin.
I find myself grinning back at him. "Filthy human."
"Mohawked freak."
"That's a new one," I say appreciatively. "I'm gonna have to find something to take the place of 'old man.'"
"Actually, I kind of like that," he admits. "Unless it makes you
uncomfortable."
I shake my head no. "So are we okay?"
"Yes." He kisses me soundly, and I wrap an arm around him. "And I have some good news for you," he says as he ruffles my mohawk affectionately.
"What's that?"
"The painting is finished. I was up all night doing it. So," he says with a sly grin, "do you have any plans for tonight?"
"Maybe a bottle of beer, a tube of lube, and thou," I laugh.
Viggo gives me that wonderful grin and cuffs me playfully on the shoulder. "I love you, you know."
"I love you, too," I say with a smile.
Putting a finger to his lips so I won't speak, he silently walks to the door. All that Ranger training has rubbed off, apparently. Swinging open the door, I hear someone cry "oof!" and a thud. "Elijah, get your hobbit ass up," Viggo says with a grin.
I walk over to the door, and laugh at the sight of Lij, Dom, and Sean red-faced with embarrassment. "Um, I guess you're made up?" Dom asks.
"You should know, filthy eavesdroppers," I growl playfully.
"Honest, we weren't dropping no eaves," Lij says earnestly, resulting in a kick in the shins from Dom.
"We were just concerned is all," Bean says.
"No need to be," I tell them. "Everything's settled."
"So, Orli, a bottle of beer, a tube of lube, and thou?" Lij giggles.
"Stupid hobbit," I snarl bounding out of the trailer to tackle him. Maybe that's immature behavior, but as I look at Viggo, he's just grinning at me.
Yeah, we're definitely alright.
