THEREíS SOMETHINí ABOUT SHINJI...
It was a normal day. Just like every other day. Except for this day. Cosí it was an irregular day. Or so we thought. As a matter of fact, it was night time.
Once upon a--(Shinji- You swore youíd never start a story like that!)
...So I did... Once upon a..............
(Shinji- Weíre waaaiii~tiiing...)
(Shinji- ...lame) There was a girl. A smart girl, who belonged to a secret ĎPreventersí society (which will not be discussed, less I kill you all) and got good grades on her report cards.
No, dumbass. Anyway, she was a gentle soul who loved all the creatures of the world (except Relena) and took pity on all the weak (except Sora). Her name was...
Linc-- You bellowed, oh mother?
Mom-- What the hell are you doing!?!
Linc- - *looks around* ...Is this some kind of trick question?
Mom-- Youíre playing video games, while you should be studying...
Linc- - ....for...?
Mom-- FINAL EXAMS!!! DAMNIT, DO YOU WANT TO STAY IN 12TH GRADE FOREVER!?!
Linc-- ...uh, is that some kind of trick question?
And thus, the fair maiden was thrown in a dark, damp, filthy dungeon (Namely, her room) to study history, Algebra 1, and science for all eternity. That is until...
Duo- Damn it, Heero! We are so lost!
Heero- No weíre not.
Duo- There are not supposed to be cows and Amish people in Osaka...
Heero- ...Yes there are.
Trowa- Why donít we just pull over and ask for directions?
Wufei- It would be deemed un-masculine.
Trowa- Letís just get Quatre to do it.
Trowa- Wassamatter, little man? Panties in a twist?
Quatre- Damn it, if Rashid was here, I would so have him kick your ass!
Trowa- Uh huh...
Wufei- Damn it, Yuy! Youíre driving too slow!
Heero- What did I tell you about back seat driving!?
Duo- Um, hey I just figured something out, guys...
Quatre- Whatís that?
Trowa- Quatre really is a chick?
Quatre- DAMN IT!
Duo- ...If weíre all only 15, how can Heero be driving?
Heero- Fake license.
Wufei- ...You do actually know how to drive, right?
Linc-- Someoneís at the front door...
Linc-- Mom-, someone is at the door!
Linc-- DAMNIT, WOMAN!! SOMEONE IS AT THE FUCKING DOOR!!!
Linc-- Oh yeah, she went grocery shopping...
Linc-- ...Oh hell... *goes downstairs* With my luck, itís probably someone Iím related to...
Duo- Christ, Heero!
Heero- Guess I donít know my own strength...
Wufei- But can he open a jar of pickles? Nooo...
Linc-- *Enters* Uh, if you guys a selling doors, door-to-door, youíve made your point.
Quatre- Iíll pay for it...
Linc-- Uh, can I help you?
Trowa- Our car ran into a tree--
Trowa- *points at Heero* Ask Jeff Gordon.
Linc-- Sir, youíre stupid.
Trowa- So, we need a place to spend the night--
Linc-- Welcome to the Bates Hotel, boys.
Trowa- ...and weíre in the middle of nowhere.
Linc-- Amish Country USA.
Duo- Damn Heero, you need to brush up on your navigational skills.
Trowa- And, for good measure, itís starting to rain.
*Rains on cue*
Linc-- Hmm, well Iíd like to help you bu- ...Heero?
Heero- Uh, yeah?
Linc-- So that must mean youíre all the G-Pilots, right?
Wufei- How the fuck does everyone know that?
Linc- - Fansubs.
Linc- - Never mind. So... what will you give me if I let you stay in the spare bedroom?
H/W/T/D- *Looks at Quatre*
Trowa- Free, or best offer?
Quatre- Phuh! NO!
H/W/D- *Looks at Trowa*
Trowa- I have a key chain that opens beer bottles...
Linc- - *whips out key chain* Have one already.
Linc-- And a Tomogatchi.
W/D- *Look at Heero*
Heero- Um, I found a condom in the passenger seat.
Duo- Damn it! Thatís where I was sitting, Heero!
Linc- - Um. Ew.
Heero- Well, it isnít used.
Duo- Uh... Say, youíre single, right?
Linc- Ė How does everyone know that!?!
Duo- Howíd you like to go on a date with the God of Death? Eh? Eh?
Linc-- Sorry, I donít feel like getting killed by my fellow FanGirls today.
Quatre- Hurry up! Iím getting wet!
Linc-- Theyíd do it, too.
Wufei- I have nothing to give an onna!
Linc- - Hey! Coo! You have Pocky!
Duo- *Yanks it form Wufei* You like it, itís yours!
Linc- Ė Free food! *accepts and squeals like any fangirl would*
Wufei- I didnít agree to this!
Trowa- I didnít agree to being paired up with Quatre for every mission, and yet, here we are.
Linc- - ...whatever.
Duo- Iím hungry!
Linc- - What do I look like, a chef?
Heero- Your cat is annoying the crap out of me...
Linc- - With Relena and all, you should be used to it.
Heero- Sheís not fuzzy.
Wufei- I beg to differ.
Duo- Youíre out of cereal. *munch*munch*
Quatre- ....Thatís cat food.
Duo- Eww... *munch*munch*
Heero- AWWW! You such a cute widdle thing! Yes you are! Yseyouare! Ooís a cuwtey? Woo are!
Duo- ...thanks, I think...
Heero- I meant the cat.
Mom-- Iím hooo~ooome!
Linc- - How good are you guys at stealth?
Linc- - ....My faith is dwindling...
Mom-- *enters kitchen* shouldnít you be studying?
Linc- - Need brain food.
Mom-- *unpacks groceries* Sorry, but youíre going to be eating for a while.
Linc- - ...
Mom-- *Opens up fridge* ...Explain yourself, Linc-.
Linc- - Huh? Oh my...
Duo- *from the fridge* Make me a sandwich woman!
*We interrupt this program for this important announcement*
*We now continue.*