So let me come to you, close as I wanted to be
Close enough for me, to feel your heart beating fast
And stay there as I whisper, how I loved your peaceful eyes on me
Did you ever know, that I had mine on you
-Faye Wong

The first day I met him, it was raining outside and I was going to the Merry Sunshine café with my sister to meet one of her friends, Mandee Nemeth. Don't ask me why she dragged me along with her. I sure as hell didn't want to go sit with her and her headache-inducing little friends. The only reason I went was because she said Mandee was bringing her little brother along as well. God, why do I always get sucked into Umi's endless stream of, "You are such a social outcast Ern, you need some friends"? I know I'm a fucking social outcast. I don't need her reminding me every 5 minutes. I mean, it's not that I don't want new friends, and it's not that I don't like people...I just...don't want my big sister setting me up on "playdates" with her obnoxious friend's brother's cousin's sister twice removed. Jesus, is that really too fucking much to ask?

I sighed as I was relentlessly dragged into Mister Blue Merrick's lifework, which he cheerfully named the Merry Sunshine. Blue's a card, lemme tell ya. He and I got acquainted one day when I had to run into the café to escape the rain. (It's always raining in this fucking town.) It was around 2 am and I was just heading home from a night class that I had been going to. As you can imagine, 2 am is awfully late and my parent's wouldn't exactly approve, so suffice it to say -- I was sneaking out to go to it. But anyway, when I stumbled into Blue's café it was all empty and it was just him sitting at a back table, eating some sort of cake that he had made and drinking a cappucino. I said hi, you know, all non-chalant like, dripping puddles on the floor and such. He looked at me, laughed and came to help. The next thing I knew, my clothes were off and he was carrying them to the dryer that he has in the back (like this sort of thing happens all the time). We talked for a little while, of course, exchanging stories of late-night instances like the one that was taking place. And then for some reason, I mentioned off handedly that he was a really good looking guy. Then, one thing led to another and we ended up having sex right there on the café floor. I know I know, I'm a fucking slut. Bite me.
But the strangest part is that Blue and I have never spoken of that night.
It's almost as if it never happened.
Weird, I know.

But anyway, back to my real story, before I go into more of my innane musings of the universe. As I was saying, Umi practically dragged my ass into the oh-so-familiar-café and immediately spotted the friend that she went there to meet. Now, I didn't really like Mandee all that much at first. There was just something about her that didn't sit well with me. I'm still not even quite sure what it was exactly.
"Hi Umi, how are you?" she squealed, embracing my sister like she needed her for life-support.
They chatted for a minute before Umi graciously introduced me,
"Mandee, this is my brother Ernest." she said, nudging my shoulder playfully. I could've smacked her right there and then, but I took the high road and shook Mandee's hand instead,
"Nice to meet you." I choked out, nearly gagging on the untrue words. Mandee smiled politely and uttered a 'likewise.'
"My brother Christopher should be around soon. He's down the street mailing off some things to our brother Serge." Oh joy. I just can't wait. //sigh//
"Cool." I muttered, pulling out a chair for Umi (what a gentleman, huh?) and then taking one for myself. I looked around the café and immediately spotted Blue at the counter. I waved slightly and he waved back, motioning me to come over. I smiled and sighed in relief. Saved!
"Hey Umi, I'll be right back, I'm gonna go over and chat with Blue for a bit." I said, careful not to interrupt her conversation completely. She nodded and shooed me off. Oh sister of mine, how I do adore thee. I walked over to the counter and familiarly propped my elbows on the glass,
"Hey Blue, how's it going?"
"Pretty good, Ernest, how are you?" he inquired cheerfully, nicking my chin with his knuckle.
I blushed and swatted his hand away, laughing a little nervously,
"Horrible. Thanks for asking." I replied in that snarky tone of voice that my sister hates.
"Horrible? Why horrible?"
"My sister dragged me here to hang out with on of her friend's brothers or whatever. He's not even here yet for Christ's sake. I have to listen to girl talk, as usual."
"Oh come on, Ern, it can't be that bad."
" Please, Blue, are you kidding? It's awful! I do not want to be set up on a playdate with some obnoxious-know-it-all geek boy, and I certainly don't want to sit around listening to my sister chat with her stupid friends." He laughed heartily and caressed my cheek with his thumb. I blushed and looked down at my feet.
"You'll be ok, Ern. Maybe you'll even like this girl's brother. You're too pretty not to be taken by now." Complemented Blue, tucking my hair behind my ear before withdrawing his hand. I gulped and looked up at him hopefully,
"What about you, Blue? Don't you like me?" I asked. He smiled at me and looked me in the eyes. There was a sadness hidden in the depths of them,
"Of course I like you Ernest. I've liked you since that one night stand we shared...but the fact is that...you're jailbait Ernest...I just can't risk it. I'm sorry...." he looked away from me, seemingly saddened. As much as it hurt to be rejected by Blue, I understood. After all, he was 23 and I was only 16. I certainly didn't want him to get arrested just because he and I would be having consensual sex. I slowly tore my eyes away from him and smiled sadly,
"Don't worry Blue, I understand. We can be friends though, right?" I inquired hopefully. "Of course." he replied.
It was then that I heard my name being called by my sister. I cast one more grin at Blue and he gave me one back.
"Hey Ernest, come meet Christopher!" Umi yelled, waving me back over into our little corner of the café. I turned away and started walking, waving at Blue randomly.
"I'm coming sissy, jeez." I muttered, dragging my feet over to the table, not looking up from the floor as I went.
"Ern, this is Christopher."
"Nice to meet you Ernest..." The boy said in a honey soaked voice that would catch even god's attention. I snapped my head up to get a clear look at him. Oh my god...he's gorgeous... I thought, barely able to tear my eyes away from his face. He shook my hand and I managed to choke out a, 'likewise.' We sat down in silence next to our sisters, who continued to chatter, paying no mind to either of us anymore. Neither of us looked at each other, but I kept stealing glances at him, trying to be coy. I wonder if he likes boys too... I thought, looking around the room trying to keep my mind off the dirty things I wanted to do to him.
But, it was more than that. I didn't just want to fuck him. I could see myself being with him. I'm a sap, I know. How could I have possibly thought that about a person I didn't even know? To tell you the truth...I have no idea. It was just a feeling I had as I continuously snuck glances at the boy called Christopher.
"So..." I started, nearly inaudible over the noise in the café. I let the silence stretch for a little while, before picking my sentence back up, "I'm sorry...I really don't know what to say." I chuckled, surpressing all the thoughts of him deep down in my pshyche. He smiled at me,
"It's ok Ernest, I really don't know what to say either." he replied, giving me a little comfort.
"So Christopher...do you like boys?" I blurted out, not even realizing what I was saying until I had said it. Nice Ern, real smooth. Now he's gonna know that you totally wanna jump his bones. I covered my mouth with my hands in shock and blushed. Christopher blinked at me for a minute, then started laughing. A moment later, the laughter subsided and he looked up at me,
"I'm sorry for laughing at you. It's just that...that question...was really sudden."
"Oh...yeah, I'm really sorry. Forget I asked..." I said, all the blood rushing to my cheeks.
"Oh no, no, it's a perfectly legitimate question. You just blurted it out so suddenly that it took me by surprise," Christopher explained, the friendly smile never leaving his face, "but anyway, in response to your question...yes I do like boys."
I blushed again and looked down at the table, smiling, "That's cool. Me too." I admitted, sending a hopeful glance across the table. We shared that gaze for a good 30 seconds before he blushed and looked away. What did he see in my eyes? Oh good lord, I hope it wasn't pornographic. Gah, I am so not suave...he'll never fall for me.
"So, Ernest...um...would you...like to go to dinner with me tonight? I mean, without our sisters?" Christopher inquired, playing with a napkin on the table in front of him nervously. I swear....at that moment....Satan himself could've walked up and slapped me on the ass and I would not have noticed. I was frozen. I couldn't move. I couldn't think. I couldn't speak (a personal first). All I could do was sit there and stare at him, wondering to myself...did my dreams just come true in a blink of an eye?
"Ernest?" said Christopher, cocking his head at me, "if...if you don't want to go that's fine..I just, thought since you asked...um......" he stammered, obviously mortified.
"No! No! Of course I want to go out to dinner with you! I'm sorry, I was speechless that's all." I assured him, snapping out of my daze. He smiled at me sweetly, nervously.
"Wow, you two just met and you're already going out on a date? I told you this day would be good for you Ernest." Umi said, nudging my arm with her elbow. Was she listening to us this whole time?! I turned towards her and scowled,
"Umi! Were you eavesdropping on us?" I yelled, giving her the most evil death glare I could muster. She winked at me and grabbed my hand under the table. I looked at her closely and upon thorough inspection I deduced that she was happy for me, so I let my mock-anger go.Christopher laughed and we shared glances across the table until it was time for us to go.