Hostel Review

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Plot:Three backpackers head to a Slovakian city that promises to meet their hedonistic expectations, with no idea of the hell that awaits them.

Cast: Jay Hernandez, Derek Richardson, Eythor Gudjonsson, Barbara Nedeljakova, Jana Kaderabkova, Jan Vlasák, Jennifer Lim, Lubomir Silhavecky, Paula Wild, Lubomir Bukovy, Petr Janis, Jana Havlickova, Vanessa Jungova.

My Thoughts:Eh.

Review:If you're going into "Hostel" expecting one hell of a ride,then you shouldn't get your expectations so far up.As much as this film tries to be something different from the norm,it sticks in too many things we've seen already before we get to the real good stuff.In "Hostel", 3 guys Paxton (Jay Hernandez), Josh (Derek Richardson), and Oli (Eythor Gudjonsson) hit Eastern Europe looking for a "good time" (sex and booze in other words). While there,they get a tip to head to a "Hostel" for american tourists which the tipster promises will meet all of their "expectations". Which it does at first,but then things take a turn for the strange when Paxtons buddies Josh and Oli disappear mysteriously. You have to appreciate the effort from Eli Roth with "Hostel",but the film falls way short of what it could've been. If there was anything I found extremely annoying in this film, it was the "American Pie" clone teenagers played by Hernandez and Richardson. You know the types,the ones who are constantly talking about sex, and how they can meet some hot girls to score with. Granted thats what most guys think about,but these dudes seemed to mention it every 3 seconds. The "clones" do get laid once they hit the Hostel they were tipped off about,and hook up with two mysterious euro beauties named Natalya,and Svetlana.But the next morning Oli turns up missing and ironically enough,an asian girls friend also has mysteriously vanished. It doesn't take long before you can sense that there's some sinister stuff going on in this part of town. But the problem with "Hostel" is that it takes way too long to ever get to the sinister stuff. If a horror movie is going to take it's sweet time getting to the nastiness, it has to present an alternative,whether it be the characters,or an underlying subplot. "Hostel" can't do this because it's characters lack depth and there is no alternative seeing as how it won't be hard for most people to have the film figured out by the time the first vanishing takes place. So what were left with is Hernandezes character of Paxton straggling around with his buddy when one of the 3 disappears and then straggling around alone when 2 of the group ends up vanishing. Another thing to hate in this movie is the stupidity of the american characters. Think about it,if one of your friends vanished mysteriously after a night of drinking and sex with a two hot eurogirls,would you then repeat the same actions the next night,with the same two girls, despite now being one man short? I certainly wouldn't. Even if the women do rank an alarming 9.9 on the hottie scale."Hostel" does eventually get to what us horror fans have all been waiting for, when the torture for fun loons finally rear their ugly heads.But even in those scenes the movie falls flat due to poor execution, and most of all poor lighting during most of the scenes. We do get some good blood,loss of limbs, and gore, but not enough of it to make up for the boredom and annoyance of the first 50 or 60 minutes."Hostel" tries to pull off a few twists to shock the audience as the film nears it's climax, but only two manage to fully succeed. One comes near the very end and it's a doosey believe me. Because this movie cashed in with 20 million dollars last weekend during that rough January period,it's already having a sequel fast tracked...but I have to ask the question,whats the point? Things wrapped up pretty nicely and I really don't see how a sequel could work due to most of the "Elite Hunting" guys pushing up daisies. "Hostel" is about as tame and run of the mill as they come despite it's deceptive trailers. You'll more than likely enjoy the last half hour as much as I did,but when you look back on "Hostel", that will probably be all you remember, or atleast,care to remember.Well,that and those utterly hilarious moments where the bubble gum gang shows up.

Pros:The last 30 minutes are awesome,Jay Hernandez gives a good performance,and the bubble gum gang provided some much needed laughs when they were shown on screen.A moderately good amount of blood,and gore.The two main women of the film were easy on the eyes,and a great ending. There's also a very nasty "eye" scene that promises to make you cringe.

Cons:Very thin on plot and character development,annoying characters,although Hernandez got less annoying once things got serious. I can't stress enough how I hate horror movies that bore you to tears and then take off in the last half hour. Kind of makes you wonder where was all of this fun and excitement one hour ago?

Overall:Worth a watch just to say you had the experience. But don't go in expecting something alarmingly sadistic or shocking. I honestly found the acts perpetrated in "The Devils Rejects" much more disturbing.

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