Welcome to Page Two. What you are about to see will shock you, amaze you, and horrify you to the point of going home and crying to your mother. This message serves as a warning to any of you who may be weak of stomach or of heart. In all seriousness, consider this a precaution. I am not responsible for any nausea, pain, or nightmares inflicted upon you due to the contents of this page. Enter at your own risk. Have a lovely day! ;)
...My Personal Favorite...
"Children's Book Ideas That Never Made It"
"You Were an Accident"
"Strangers Have the Best Candy"
"The Little Sissy Who Snitched"
"Some Kittens Can Fly!"
"Getting More Chocolate on Your Face"
"Where Would You Like to Be Buried?"
"Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her"
"The Attention Deficit Disorder Association's Book of Wild Animals of North Amer- Hey! Let's Go Ride Our Bikes!"
"All Dogs Go to Hell"
"The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking"
"You Are Different and That's Bad"
"Pop! Goes the Hamster....and Other Great Microwave Games"
"Testing Homemade Parachutes Using Only Your Household Pets"
"Babar Meets the Taxidermist"
"Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence"
"The Boy Who Died from Eating All His Vegetables"
"Start a Real-Estate Empire with the Change from Your Mom's Purse"
"The Pop-up Book of Human Anatomy"
"Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will"
"The Care Bears Maul Some Campers and Are Shot Dead"
"How to Become the Dominant Military Power in Your Elementary School"
"Controlling the Playground: Respect through Fear"
"When Mommy and Daddy Don't Know the Answer, They Say God Did It"
"Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia"
"What Is That Dog Doing to That Other Dog?"
"Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?"
"Daddy Drinks Because You Cry"
"Mister Policeman Eats His Service Revolver"
CONFUCIUS SAYS....
"Man who run in front of car get tired"
"Man who run behind car get exhausted"
"Two wrongs not make a right - Three lefts do"
"Man who eat many prunes get good run for money."
"War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left."
"Man who tell one too many light bulb jokes soon burn out!"
"Man who sit on tack get point!"
"Man who stand on toilet is high on pot!"
"Man who lives in glass house should change in basement"
"If you want pretty nurse, you got to be patient."
Candy Bar Personality Test
Choose your favorite of the following:
BABY RUTH
3 MUSKETEERS
BUTTER FINGERS
SNICKERS
HERSHEY'S
ALMOND JOY with ALMONDS
CLARK BAR
GOOD'n'PLENTY
ENERGY BAR
CHOCOLATE COATED RAISINS
Okay - Now that we have your choice,
this is what "research" says about you...No cheating or changing answers! Scroll down for the answers...;)
BABY RUTH - Sweet, loving, cuddly. You love all warm fuzzy items. A little nutty. Sometimes you need a little treat like an ice cream cone at the end of the day.
3 MUSKETEERS - You are adventurous, love new ideas, are a champion of underdogs and a slayer of dragons. When tempers flare up, you whip out
your saber.
BUTTER FINGERS - Smooth articulate, you are an excellent after-dinner speaker and a good teacher.
But don't try to walk and chew gum at the same time.
SNICKERS - Fun-loving, sassy, humorous. Everyone enjoys being around you. But you are a practical joker -- others should be cautious in shaking hands!
HERSHEY'S - Romantic, warm, loving. You care about other people and can be counted on in a pinch. You tend
to melt and get gushy if held too close.
ALMOND JOY with ALMONDS--Sexy, always ready to give and receive, very energetic, and really like to get into life. The opposite sex is always attracted to you.
CLARK BAR--You like sports, whether baseball, football, basketball, or soccer. If you could, you would like to participate, but enjoy watching sports. You don't like to give up the remote control.
GOOD'N'PLENTY---You are a very fun loving person, who likes to laugh. You are fun to be with. People like to go to the movies with you. Children find you amusing. You are a very warm hearted person.
ENERGY BAR--You are very active. You are so active, life is passing you by. Get a life! Go eat a plum.
CHOCOLATE COATED RAISINS--You go to the bathroom often.
