This is the way it works. You can read the fight in it's entirety and also you have my own "colored comments" there with the original text. Colored comments are added explanations or justifications of what was said but were not part of the original text itself. They are just used to make a point. In this section, my colored comments will be marked in green.

The first item up for public display is an E-mail war between a fellow RPer and I that happened not too long ago. The names have been changed.

The first E-mail, she sent me info on a new chara for a new story:

[ Name Edit ] And if the girl who is responsible for this nice little entry is in fact reading this, you know who you are, there is no "TH" in the Japanese language. I know. I speak quite a bit of it myself. So you may want to rethink your character's surname seeing as it is going to be horribly translated. Also, the surname comes before the first name in Japanese. Then again, this is assuming that the character is Japanese based - which I am going to guess is. No offense, truly, just helpful hints from one RPer to another.

Physical Age: 22
Height: 5’7
Race: Sajin Demon. An ancient race of demons, said to be extinct, except for very few of those who survived through the centuries. They were different than the usual species of demon; able to summon demon’s and monster’s spirits and merge them into their bodies, able to access their power, abilities, as well as their own in the realm of battle. Their blood has a healing attribute, but cannot be used to help themselves, only others. Because their blood had such in descript energies in it, many other creatures hunted them down to either take their blood or destroy them from hatred. Most Sajin demon are beautiful in appearance. The Sajin’s were mostly destroyed when an off-race of powerful human, the Hienne, attacked them from anger and spite, and continued to hunt them down until eventually, their race died down as well.

Attributes: [Name edit] is stronger than she looks, and very agile. She excels at speed, thievery, and combat strategies, and has mastered her strangely-designed weapon, the double-bladed Blood Moon, as well as taken on the spanning asininities of the Reaper Techniques, taught to her by her elven sensei. (An elven ninja…get that!) She has been practicing her summoning techniques, but has not mastered what is called the “Summoner’s wall” which prevents the demonic and monstrous spirits from overtaking her body and keeping her soul shut away, so summoning is still a dangerous thing for her to do. The one demonic spirit she gained access to but will not use is the most powerful, but also the most treacherous; [Name Edit], a demonic sorcerer and a berserk murderer.
*Note* In order to call demon and monsters, [Name edit] somehow had to gain access to them, either through a dream or communication with the dead.

Quirks: [Name Edit] cannot swim. Nightmares of drowning plagued her since childhood, causing a phobia of being in water above her neck. She will seriously sink like a dead weight if thrown in the middle of deep water. She values her honor more than she does her own life, and will do just about anything to withhold her honor and any promises she made. Most have attempted to take that to their advantage.

Personality: [Name Edit] can seem cheerful more than half the time, and is very sarcastic and perverted. She rarely talks about her childhood, because truth be told, she never really had one. Her memories were wiped completely away, and she can only remember waking up in the darkness at a younger age, around eleven, and somehow managing to break out of a stone tomb she was in. The moment she got out, two crimson blades burst from her shoulder blades as if they were wings, and upon clattering to the floor, merged with each other into one weapon, which is now the Blood Moon. She is very curious, which is one of her weaknesses in some occasions.

She is usually accompanied by a small demon orb creature, about the size of a softball, with large, soulless white eyes, two little demon horns, and a demon’s tail, and a stitched on smile. The creature is named Pyro, and is a very useful little thing, able to turn itself into things, steal things, and generally just annoy people.

Another thing about [Name Edit] is: She never fell in love. There was a ‘family’ love with her clan, and though there had been several occasions where her fellow clansmen would emotionally attempt to advance on her, she’d turn them all away. She doesn’t expect love from anything, and being a Konuichi, she doesn’t believe she needs it, either. One thing that she searches for, however, is “That one precious thing to protect.” Which remains a mystery as to what she means by that.

My reply:

Hey there,