So I was walking home from albertsons, where I had bought breath mints, and hair gel, because I was going to go out in 2 days, and I was singing along with Metallica's Enter Sandman, when a woman runs past me to get to a bus that was already leaving. After I laughed at her misery, she went up to me and said "why are you laughing at me?" And I said that I wasn't laughing. And she rattles off a string of incompreshensible sentences that had something to do with her job and being late. I began to slowly walk toward my house, 4 blocks down, and I indicated that there would be another bus in 30 minutes. She began to walk next to me down the street. Then she asked me again why I was laughing, and I told "probably because I'm stupid," and she started laughing, and then asked me "do you theenk... that eef a woman was sad... that she should spend time with A MAN, A STRANGER?" At that time, I was thinking to myself "what the hell is this crap?" And so I told her sure, it was fine to spend time with a stranger. And she said soemthing that I couldn't understand, and then she asked me "where do you live?" Right then I was thinking "I need to dislocate her hip and run for my life." So I told her I lived far away, and then I walked slower, and let her go ahead of me,I crossed the street, eyes on her the whole time, and watched her go away, thinking "Goddamn, what was that?"
My good looks have ugly-nosed women stalk me.