Aerosmith Use Cyberspace Tour To Tell Dirty Jokes And Discuss AUTO- FELLATIO!
Aerosmith's Steven Tyler: "The road to self- fellacio begins with your hand!"
On december 4-7, 1994, Aerosmith embarked on their 'Cyberspace Tour,' a
four-day event that allowed fans all over the world to speak 'directly' to the
band on the leading information service providers: Compuserve, Prodigy, America
Online and the Internet.
This was a first for a band to utilize all four online services in such a way,
which broght together so many people at one time, for an interactive gathering.
Proceeds from the connect time charges and sales of the limited edition 'Aerosmith
Cyberspace Tour' T-shirts (which were specially designed for the event by the
graphic artists at Wired Magazine) went to benefit the Eletronic Frontier
Foundation (EFF)-- a civil liberties oraganization dedicated to advancing free
speech on the net- works. In addition, the band secured substancial cash
donations for the Foundation from Geffen Records, EMI Music Publishing and
Columbia Records.
For two of the online events, Aerosmith were set- up backstage at two of their
shows with Macintosh Powerbooks. For the other two nights, the band linked up
with their fans while enroute to the concert using the same computer set- up.
And for those of you who missed this historical event, here's segments of
Aerosmith's conversations with fans:
TELL US THE DIRTIEST JOKE YOU KNOW.
STEVEN TYLER: There was a young man from Kent, who had one so long that it
bent. To save him some trouble, he stuck it in double and instead of coming he
went!!! Hmmm Hhmmmhmmm…
TOM HAMILTON: What do you call a dog with 2 inch legs and steel balls?
JOE PERRY: I dunno, what?
TOM: Sparky.
WHAT ADVICE CAN YOU GIVE STRUGGLING CATS LIKE MYSELF WHO FEEL THEY HAVE WHAT
IT TAKES TO GET SIGNED, BUT THE INDUSTRY GIVES US THE SHORT END OF THE STICK?
STEVEN: A road of a thousand miles starts with the first step. Do the clubs,
and whatever it takes. Set up in a mall. Fake it till you make it, if you have
to.
TOM: Endeavor to persist.
TO ANY MEMBER OF AEROSMITH: HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE REEMERGENCE OF PUNK
ROCK? EXAMPLE: GREEN DAY AND D GENERATION.
STEVEN: It's new, it's free, it rocks, it speaks for a generation.
JOE: A good song is a good song. It doesn't matter what you call it.
BRAD: The more guitars the better!
TOM Great! Tear down the walls!
STEVEN: Thanks God, it's suffocating all the corporate bullshit.
WHAT IS ONE SKILL YOU DON'T HAVE THAT YOU WISH YOU COULD MASTER?
JOE: Typing!
STEVEN: Self- felatio.
TOM: The friggin' bass guitar!
JOE: Steven, that's not a skill. That's a gift!
WHAT IS THE WORST THING YOU HAVE EVER DONE IN TERMS OF BREAKING THE LAW?
STEVEN: I support the 1st, 4th and 5th Amendments!
JOE: I break the laws of nature all the time.
BRAD: We don't need no stinkin' badges!
TOM: I once committed an unnatural act in the state of Euphoria.
JOE: The law of gravity. - J, R.