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Blonde Jokes

How do you know when a blonde has used your computer?
There's white-out all over the screen.

 

Why did the blonde freeze to death at the drive in movie?
She went to see CLOSED FOR THE SEASON.

 

Why did the blonde write "TGIF" on her shoes?
To remind her that "toes go in first."

 

A brunette, redhead and blonde went to a fitness spa for some fun and relaxation. After a stimulating healthy lunch, all three decided to visit the ladies room and found a strange-looking woman sitting at the entrance who said, "Welcome to the ladies room. Be sure to check out our newest feature: a mirror which, if you look into it and say something truthful, you will be awarded with a wish. But, be warned, for if you say something false, you will be sucked into the mirror to live in a void of nothingness for all eternity!" The three women quickly entered and upon finding the mirror, the brunette said, "I think I'm the most beautiful of us three" and in an instant she was surrounded by a pile of money. The redhead stepped up and said "I think I'm the most talented of us three" and she suddenly found the keys to a brand new Lexus in her hands. Excited over the possibility of having a wish come true, the blonde looked into the mirror and said, "I think..." and was promptly sucked into the mirror.

What do you do is a blonde throws a pin at you? RUN!!! - she's got a grenade in her mouth!

 

What do you do when a blonde throws a hand grenade at you?
Pull the pin and throw it back.

 

What happened to the blonde ice hockey team?
They drowned in spring training.

 

Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence?
To see what was on the other side.

 

How do you make a blonde's eyes twinkle?
Shine a flashlight in their ear.

 

What does a blonde and a beer bottle have in common?
They're both empty from the neck up.

 

A Blonde and a brunette were walking outside when the brunette
said, "Oh, look at the dead bird." The Blonde looked up and said, "Where?"

 

Two blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some
tracks. The first blonde said, "These look like deer tracks."
The other one said, "No, they look like moose tracks!" They
argued for quite a while. In fact, they were still arguing when
the train hit them.

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