The Dragonz started three years ago, comprising of a team of young hungry
go-getters ready to make a splash in domestic competition at Jordanville.
The original members consisted of:
A scrawny Dave concentrating on VCE
A chunkier, fatter and peroxided Cam
Same ol Melv
An overgrown Jon on steroids
A guy bearing a strong resemblence to Psyduck called Chuan
A half man half nut crazy lookin dude called Psycho Melv
A small guy like a rabbit called Thomas
The first game pitted the young and inexperienced Dragonz against a bunch
of vikings named Olaf, Olga and Oleg, all being twice the size of our "centre".
The nerves showed as the Dragonz endeavoured to a big 4 point first half,
averaging 2 points every 10 minutes. Although they battled heroically, they
ended up scoring 17 points for the game. Disheartened, the whole season
turned out pretty similar, only gaining a few wins, with one thanks to a
buzzer beating 3 from Dave.
With the sudden disappearance of Psycho Melv due to unexplained reasons,
literally, and he his occasional reappearance for no apparent reason, coupled
with the acquisitions of Albie Sin and the multi-racial South African Rachaad
Mohammed Nazeer Omar Wasim Akhtar Ahmed Akram Mushtaq Abdulla, the new-look
Dragonz were ready to compete. The new members fit well and although the
team took to gel, Albert's outside shooting and Rachaad's constant cherry
picking layups propelled the Dragonz into the playoffs, squaring off against
long-time nemesis Air Quantum. Led by the big 3 of Dave, Cam and Roach Ass
(Rachaad) who were inspired by the asian women on the bench, the Dragonz
held off the little fat guy called Tony's brother (I think that's his name)
who drained multiple 3's and Cam n Roach proved to be the better white boys
than the white guy on Air Quantum. Next up were the guys from the local
pub, sporting their matching drinking attire with tight blue singlets often
seen in those advertisements on TV were a construction worker is drinking
VB. A tight contest, but with the Dragonz at a huge height disadvantage,
David slayed Goliath and comfortable won with a myriad of teamwork and cherrypicking
by Rachaad. Now, the only thing that stood between the Dragonz and their
first title was another big team. With a huge crowd of 10 supporting them
on the sidelines, they started off on fire, nailing multiple open jumpshots
and converting many fast break layups, racing away to a double digit lead.
However, the inevitable came when the opposing centre realised that we would
headbutt him in the balls if we walked into him, and started to assert himself
down low. Clawing their way back into the game, it went down to the wire.
Crucial turnovers and poor referees resulting in a heartbreaking 2 point
Fast forward a couple seasons and the Dragonz underwent a new facelift.
With Jon committing to slavery at Accenture, the team was in need of a new
approach. Recruiting the #1 wannabe n*ggah in Melbourne, Mayur and the 6
foot Australian version of Shaq in Wally, the Dragon now competed at a much
higher level. However, now the team tended to defer to Wally 99% of the
time unless Roach Ass decided he felt like going on a shooting spree. Having
a strong season, we were outplayed in the finals by a crappier Brentwood
team and again did not play to our potential. The next season was even worse,
with the Walsta not turning up to half the games and the Dragonz failed to
make the playoffs. With the Dragonz disbanding, we realised a change of
scenery was needed and we entered the Nunawading Basketball Competition sans
Roach, Mayur and Wally, adding a new recruit in Hung Long, or David Chen.
With Dave and Cam in particular ready to step in the spotlight, the team
was re-energised with a renewed vigour to step into the lowest form of competition,