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brad pitt pics My website with brad pitt pics magazine. brad pitt pics Graveyard Shift Walking home after a late party one dark night, two young men decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery. Drawing close to the middle of the cemetery, they were startled by a sharp tapping noise coming from the shadows. As they approaching, trembling, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones. "Geez! You scared us half to death, mister!" the one guy said. "What are you doing working here so late at night?" "Oh, it's those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!" brad pitt pics Guard Dog A young couple lived in a town filled with crime. After three neighbors had been robbed, the couple decided to get a guard dog. Visiting the pet store, the young wife asked for a good guard dog. "Sorry, we're all sold out," the clerk replied. "All we have left is this little Scottie dog. But he does know karate!" The woman didn't believe the clerk, so he told the dog to karate a chair. The dog broke the chair into pieces. Then he told the dog to karate a table, and the dog quickly broke the table in half. So the woman bought the dog and took it home. Her husband was disappointed and skeptical about the Scottie dog's abilities as a guard dog. The wife told him about the dog's excellent karate skills. "Karate, my butt!" the husband yelled. To this very day, he is still in the hospital. brad pitt pics Halloween Prank Sandy's husband was regularly coming home drunk, so she hatched a plan to cure him of the habit. One Halloween night she dressed up as a devil and hid behind a tree to catch him on his way home. When her husband came staggering down the sidewalk, she jumped out in her red horns and forked tail and pointed her pitchfork at him. "Who are you?" her husband asked. "I'm the Devil," she responded. "Well, come on home with me then!" he said. "I married your sister!" brad pitt pics Happy New Year! A woman with 14 children,ages one through fourteen, decided to sue her husband for divorce on grounds of desertion. "When did he desert you,"the judge asked. "Thirteen years ago,"she replied. "If he left 13 years ago, where did all the children come from?" "Well,"said the woman,"he kept coming back to say he was sorry." brad pitt pics High I.Q. Joke A bartender asks Descartes, "Another round?" Descartes says "I think... not" and then he disappears. brad pitt pics In The Sauna Jeff, Tim, and Wally were sitting naked in a sauna one day, bragging about their wealth and success. Suddenly there was a beeping sound. Tim pressed his forearm and the beeping stopped. The other two men looked astonished. "I have a microchip under the skin on my arm and that's my pager." Tim explained. A few minutes later, a ringing noise interrupted their conversation. Wally lifted his wrist to his ear and started talking. When he was done, he turned to the others and bragged, "The microchip in my arm connects me to my mobile phone." Jeff, feeling left out, stepped out of the sauna. He returned a few minutes later with a piece of toilet paper sticking out from between his buttocks. The other two stare at him. "Oh," he explains, "I'm just getting a fax." brad pitt pics Interview Manager: "For a man with no experience, you are certainly asking for a high salary." Applicant: "Well, the work is much harder when you don't know what you're doing!" It's A Lie! A man is late getting home after having a fling with his secretary. When the man gets home he notices that his clothes are wrinkled and he has lipstick all over his face. At that precise moment, his wife surprises him. "Where have you been?" , she asks. The man breaks down and says, "I can't lie to you. I had an affair with my secretary in a motel room, and that's where I've been all day." The woman says, "You can't fool me! You've been out playing golf again!" |