Hey hey hey! OK, so if you're lookin' for good times with good friends you've come to the right place! I have all kinds of good stuff in store for you: quotes, bets, most embarassing moments, quizzes, and lists!
Last updated on: August 9, 2002
What's Updated: The Newest Quotes, the rant of the week, and the "Guess the Speaker of the Quote" game, the Great Boyfriend Bet, the More Mortifying Moments page (see: The American Civil War = Good Times), and the new quizzes.
A very special shout-out for my good friend Catherine, who is not only going to Ireland on Monday, but who also hooked me up with a very important name (JANET Darling was the mom on Clarissa Explains It All), told me she enjoyed my rant, and tried to participate in the "Guess the Speaker of the Quote Game." Catherine, you are officially the Kerri's Krib Hero of the week. What do you win? A trip to Ireland! Woo-hoo! Congratualtions!
Here's the deal...guess who said the quote below! First person to get five right wins! What do you win? A trip to Hollywood with a chance to star as an extra in a movie with positive moral values! Either that, or a chance to become a 'Kerri's Krib' Correspondent with your very own column! I know, the excitement is overwhelming. Get the answer by whatever means you need!
OK, so only one person bothered to guess this week's speaker. It was Miss Nicole Belisle, and she guessed correctly when she said Uma Thurman.
The scoreboard so far: Bad Lisa 1, Little N 1
We here at Kerri's Krib are very proud of Lisa & Nicole, but if other people don't start playing the game will be pulled, much like the Kerri's book recommendation page of yesteryear.
Here's the third quote, and it's from Saturday Night Live. I'll give you the cast member, but you have to tell me which character they're doing. (Catherine, this one is for you!)
Guesses to this vexing puzzle can be sent to me via e-mail: KerRIC526@aol.com
This car is invincible. It can't be stopped. It can't be reasoned with. I think I will Skip work today and drive halfway across the country to see some bands. Now I just need to tint the windows, get a box for the trunk, and crank up my favorite Mineral or Sunny Day Real Estate album, but goddamnit I better get those pizzas there on time or they are coming out of my pay!
Take the Dependable Transportation Test!click here
quiz made bystranz
"Whatever happened to predictability?" is the first line of the theme song of the classic family sitcom 'Full House.' Just when you think you know everything about a show or a character on a show they go and change it. Why? Just to make it convenient for the lazy ass writers who didn't have the foresight to know the twists the show will take. This all came about this evening as I sat in my room watching 'Full House.' Now, for those of you who don't know, the show revolves around Danny Tanner (a man who becomes a widower just before the show begins) and his 3 daughters DJ, Stephanie, and Michelle. They are joined by crazy family friend Joey, hair-obsessed Uncle Jesse (who later marries and brings his wife and twin sons to the show), and DJ's best friend, next door neighbor Kimmy. The pilot episode consists of Joey and Uncle Jesse moving in to help Danny raise his 3 young daughters in the aftermath of their mother's death. The cause of this tragedy? Cancer. Fast foward seven years. Eighteen-year-old DJ and wacky friend Kimmy go to a frat party and Kimmy gets drunk off her ass, leaving good-girl DJ to cover for her. When Kimmy sobers up the two have a fight over what Kimmy feels is DJs overprotectiveness (DJ took Kimmy's car keys and wouldn't let her drive home in her inebriated state). In her defense, DJ says, "My mother died because of a drunk driver. I don't want to lose my best friend the same way." A very touching moment acted superbly by both Candace Cameron-Burh and Andrea Barber, however irritating because we know that Pam Tanner was NOT killed by a drunk driver but by cancer. Damn you, lazy 'Full House' writers.
However, friends, 'Full House' is not the only show guilty of this crime (the crime being changing facts about characters just to get a laugh or make a storyline more compelling). It pains me to say this, and as any of you who actually know me know, 'Friends,' in my opinion, is the GREATEST show ever. I mean, I can see like, 3 seconds of any episode and tell you what it is. Sad, I know, but I like to think of it as a special skill. But, alas, 'Friends' too is guilty of this annoying crime. Let us turn to season 1, the episode entitled "The One with The Thumb." Chandler becomes re-addicted to cigarettes (the original addiction occured before the series began), and his friends (the rest of the gang) give him crap for his disgusting habit. Eventually, to take some of the heat off of himself, he brings up annoying quirks of the rest of his friends: Joey's knuckle cracking, Phoebe's hair-chewing, Monica's laugh (she snorts), Ross's over-pronunciation of every word he utters, and Rachel's failure to get everyone their correct beverage orders. Mr. Bing's plan works: his friends attack each other and leave him and his Newports alone. The only problem? None of his friends--with the exception of Ross--had ever exhibited these traits. Being only the third episode of the series, this is understandable. However, in the 189 episodes that have followed 'TOW The Thumb,' none of these habits have ever appeared. I have yet to see Joey crack a knuckle, Phoebe chew on her hair, or Monica snort when she laughs. I've said it before and I'll say it again: I LOVE 'FRIENDS!' But don't make up character flaws just to get a laugh. It makes the loyal viewers doubt just how well know their beloved 'friends;' it also makes them wonder, "whatever happened to predicability?"
Author's note: 'Friends' and 'Full House' are by NO MEANS the only two shows who do this. They were used simply because they were the most convenient to me at the time the rant was written. Many shows do it.
Do you agree with my rant? Disagree? Hate me or love me but just don't have the courage to tell me? Think I'm a genius? Think my web-page sucks more ass than a two-bit trollop? Let me know and I'll put any comments you have up on the page for good-time viewing. I know both people who visit my 'KRiB' on a regular basis-Lisa and myself-will have comments. But even if you're not a regular-hell, even if your a Kerri's Krib hater, a Kerri's Krib casual visitor, or a Kerri's Krib virgin-I want to know what you have to say. E-mail me!
To read some of my previous rants, visit Rants: Past and Present
![[ you are squidward ]](http://www.liquid2k.com/ethan_sucks/quiz7/ursquidward.jpg)
Which Spongebob Squarepants Character Are You?? Find out @ blackhole
You know how sometimes people are like, 'Ohmigod! You remind me soooo much of' this movie character or that movie character? I, myself, have been compared to a few of today's leading ladies, including Mary Katherine Gallagher (Superstar), Josie "Grossie" Gellar (Never Been Kissed), and Bridget Jones (Bridget Jones's Diary), to name a few. Don't get me wrong. I love all of these ladies, but Julie-my supportive best friend-has likened me to them not because of their uncanny ability to prevail through hard times. Oh, no. It is because of their clumsiness, "verbal incontenance," and general geekiness that Julie finds I remind her of them. Although I can't blame her. To read about me making an 'a' of myself in many public situations, go to:
In a direct ripoff of Lisa's webpage, I've added a 'newest quote' section to my webpage so that my faithful readers don't have to search through every quote page to find new ones...they're all laid out for you here...good times are ahead!
To read all the great quotes of the past, click on the following, cleverly-named link:
Have you been looking for love in all the wrong places?? Perhaps the Goodtimes crew (which is actually myself) has what you're looking for! Below, for your entertainment, is an explanation of 'The Great Boyfriend Bet.' Also, if you're looking for a quality girlfriend check out the 'Guy Requirement' lists to see if you're the ideal man!
What kind of soda are you?? Find out @ blackhole
10) How about a little Puck?9) Et tu, cutie?
8) If I whispered in thine ear that thou hadst a body of beauty unknown but to the heavens, wouldst thou hold it against me?
7) My heart, it pines, as my trousers tent.
6) Without thine companionship, dear lady, I fearest I spend the evening with pen in hand, if thou knows what I mean.
5) Hey, baby, can Ophelia up?
4) But soft, what light through yonder trousers breaks?
3) Wouldst thou away to Motel6 with me?
2) 'Romeo and Gertrude' is just a working title. I might be persuaded to change it for you, m'lady.
1) Do me, or not do me. THAT is the question.
If you enjoyed those, just wait until you read these! Laugh for hours, and let the good times roll!
More Famous People Pick Up Lines
Sadly, I don't think anyone ever visited my Book of the Week link, so I have killed myself. Not really. I just took it off the page.
![[you are kiss condoms]](http://www.liquid2k.com/ethan_sucks/quiz6//urkisscondoms.jpg)
Do you share a brain with someone? I do! Her name is Lisa, and we have compiled a pro-and-con list of the benefits--and detriments--to sharing a brain! Read up to find out if sharing a brain is all it's cracked up to be.
Bryan: Know who Kerri and Lisa remind me of? Jay and Silent Bob.Tamarind: Yeah...except neither one of them is EVER silent.
Other people Tam and Bryan have compared us to: Laverne and Shirley, Cheech and Chong.
![[you are ronald]](http://www.liquid2k.com/ethan_sucks/quiz5/urronald.jpg)
Click on these to laugh your you-know-what off!
More Fun Quotes (Lisa'a Homepage)
Nicole's HomePage
The World According to Lisa (Quiz)
Dave's Quiz
Is this web-page failing to satisfy you in any way?? Emotionally, intellectually, physically? I want to know about it. If this page is leaving you with a void, let me know what you'd like to see that's not here, and I'll do my best to fix it ASAP. Long story short? If you think this page is missing something, let me know what it is and I'll put it on!
