Tossing her curls over her shoulder in frustration, Grizabella ran after Old Deuteronomy as gracefully as she could. Smoothing her coat down, she stepped in front of him, spreading her paws on his chest.
"Why?"
"You know the reasons, Grizabella." His voice neutral, he gazed calmly at the Glamour Queen, who was pouting provocatively at him. "You belong to this tribe and by departing from it, you are rejecting it."
"But why is it wrong to want to see the world? Can't I just..."
"We have spoken about this before, Grizabella. You do not get special treatment because you have all the toms wrapped around your little claw." The older tom exhaled a slow breath. "If you go, then more will and what will become of our tribe? Of our people?"
Grizabella stomped her hind paw huffily. "But there's so much to see! I won't be gone for long. I just wanna have a little fun before I lose my looks and I can't get any toms who want to keep me company."
"It's not just about the looks."
"Tell it to the toms." Her delicate grey features wrinkled in clear annoyance, her tail flicked from side-to-side in aggravation. "I heard you say once that to be a Jellicle you have to be cock of the walk when you're walking alone. How can ya do that when you're not even allowed to leave the tribe?"
Old Deuteronomy wished he could find a brick wall to smack his head off. "Look, Grizabella, give me a good reason to leave the tribe. A reason that doesn't revolve around you having fun – one that'll be for the benefit of the tribe and you might be permitted to leave."
Narrowing her black eyes, Grizabella hissed under her breath. "Why does everything have to be for the tribe? I wanna have fun for me. I wanna play and dance and sing for me. Not for the Moon, not for the Ball, not for the tribe. For me. Me! You hear me?"
"Yes, Grizabella." Deuteronomy nodded slowly, sighing in defeat. "I hear you. I hear you denying all things Jellicle. You want to leave, when our people depend entirely on the Ball and the Moon and the unity of the tribe..."
"Don't try emotional blackmail." Scarlet lips were pursed pettily. "I never like the balls. I never could do the dancing. Why should I bother? I dance when I wanna dance, not because some moon tells me to. It's just a moon."
Old Deuteronomy's spirits sank. He'd had the duty of teaching all the kittens the beliefs of the tribe. Grizabella was one of the few who had refused point blank to listen, always more interested in her looks and flirting with older toms.
"If you ever wish to be a Jellicle, you have to dance at least one ball, Grizabella." He said.
"Like I wanna be a Jellicle." Her words cut him to the quick. "We don't get to have any fun. All we do is mope around and dance and sing. I wanna go somewhere where everyone pays attention to me, like they should."
A silence fell between the two grey cats, one old beyond reason and one marred by the youth and impetuousness. Finally Deuteronomy spread his paws in defeat. "I have warned you many times of the folly of leaving the tribe, Grizabella." He said sadly. "If you leave, you will never be accepted into the tribe again..."
"Like I care about that." She interrupted, examining her claws boredly.
"You have to know the consequences, dear one." Shaking his head hopelessly, Old Deuteronomy gestured around the yard. "This place...it's part of who you are. Think about that before you attempt to leave again."
Grizabella wrinkled her nose in distaste. "Like I wanna stay around here forever. Look at it! It's a dump!" Reluctantly, she let her eyes fall on the playing kittens, the older cats. True, they looked happy, but she didn't belong here.
She belonged in a world where people looked at her, loved her, worshipped her beauty and her glamour. The toms in the yard were so...limited. A world that was anywhere, but this rotten, boring, happy junkyard.
"It's home, Grizabella."
"Maybe to you." Her voice was cold, emotionless once again. "I want somewhere better, something better than this."
Old Deuteronomy understood that. But, then, he'd seen 'something better' and he had hated it, missing his extended and loving family. Fortunately for him, leaving the yard had happened because of his owners, which meant he had been allowed to return as soon as he fled them.
For Grizabella, though, it was a different matter. She wanted to leave. It was her choice and she would listen to no reason for staying. She didn't even listen when he had explained about his brief departure from the yard.
"If you leave, of your own volition, you'll be alone, Grizabella." No longer time for soft words and soothing promises, he gazed at her calmly. "No Jellicle will want you back. No Jellicle will accept you. You really will be walking alone."
She nodded. "I know. I'll find others. Better people than these." Tossing her mane again, she gave him a smug smirk. "Don't you think that I can't. I don't need you, your acceptance or your 'happy' tribe."
Bowing his head, Deuteronomy hid the desolate expression in his eyes. He hated losing a member of the tribe, but he couldn't make her stay by force, couldn't force her to live unhappily in their family.
"If you wish to go, I can't stop you." He stated sadly. "But remember what I have told you, Grizabella. When you grow old and frail, don't expect the tribe to welcome you back. You rejected us, so they will do the same."
She shrugged expressively. "Like I ever want to come back here." Reaching up, she gave him a light kiss on the cheek. "Bye, Deuteronomy. Wish I could say I'll miss ya, but I'd be lying through my teeth..."
Watching as the dark queen turned and stalked towards the edge of the yard, ignoring all the calls from the other felines, he shook his head mournfully. She scrambled over the high fence and disappeared.
Turning back to the tyre, Deuteronomy sank down on his haunches slowly. He had commited the most grievous of sins in letting her leave, but even more in telling her that she would always be walking alone.
She would never be walking alone.
She would have him there, when she needed him, when she wanted him. When the time came, he would be waiting.
No Jellicle ever truly walked alone.