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Random Thoughts

Reminiscing

When I think about your thoughtlessness, your lack of remembering, it hurts. But why is it that when I see a small thing, like a picture or a song that reminds me of you, I forget all that anger. Well I guess you are just one of those people or those memories that I will carry to my grave. Anyway, this was a thought sent out to you. I wish success, happiness and peace for you.

Purification

I want to consume you, breathe you into my deepest core. Your every move, your every step, the inflation of your chest, as you breathe in this corrupted air, and purify it just the way my body needs it's air, it's life. I'm attracted to the subtle way your eyes scan everything. Who are you? Where did you come from? Why is it that your ways make you glow so bright among everyone else?

Protect me

Engulf your shell around me, protect me. Protect me from these feelings, emotions that creep in me. Sometimes I feel that I need your protection and your care but at times I feel so immortal. So baby, spread your wings like an angel around and over us. Let's remain here forever where it is safe. Where we can be ourselves, where there are no worries. Follow me!!!

Bleeding eyes

Why are you so fucking blind??? I can't believe I was a part of you once. Open your fucking eyes dammit. You are so insanely blind! There's more to life then you say. This isn't my way, I can feel it, there is too much friction on this road!!! It does not lead me to my destination, stop pulling me through it. Unleash me dammit!!!

Superman and an Inspiration to me

You are one of the few perfections of this life, of this world. Your response was settling, and one I am thankful for. It made me realise that I am not really loosing touch with you completely as I believe that our spirits will still be in contact. The goodness in you is definetly one that cannot be lost in this small world. Don't let my decision upset you as that was nowhere close to my intention. You are one of the few individuals who I truely respect. Someday in the future our paths may cross again, we may just find ourselves building that same island. I do believe what you said about similar people's paths crossing. One thing I know for sure, and that you should also know, is that I could NEVER forget you!!!

Where am I?

I looked around me to figure out where I was. What am I doing here? Where is this strange place, a place I visit everyday, but still I can't seem to figure out where I am , or where I am going. As the days pass I realise more and more that this world does not belong to just me, as I used to think as an infant. It just hit me, that I am infact only a number in this large population. Just yesterday, I believed that I had reached the epipheny of my life, but only now do I realise that I am infact nowhere near it. There are so many paths, which one do I take? Which one will lead me to where I belong? Fuck it!!! These are the joys of youth!!! What's a story when you know the end!

Reality?

So you say violence isn't the way? I agree. You say you're working on non-violence? You look down on violent people? You say you don't cross their lines? Well you crossed mine! I can be violent, but I express it through my writing and my silent ways which appear non-violent. I'll use this damn pen to express that violence, anger and frustration tonight. I'm sick of this bullshit! This damn monotony's getting to me! So much crap exists around me. Things have become so stale. Are you real? Or are you just another part of this delusion that has trapped me in a life I find myself living. I feel like a robot, running through everyday's new happenings. But these happenings are so belittled in the eyes of reality. REALITY! I want to live in that world. ZAP! it's a new day. What did I do yesterday? I don't remember. What am I doing next? I don't know, I guess whatever comes my way. What am I doing now? I'm not really sure. DAMN REALITY! so full of sweet juice! BULLSHIT!!! So corrupt.

A good what?

A silent spirit subtly escapes the radio and seeps into your body. It fills every space and part of your unaware body. It lifts you higher and higher, so high until you reach the core of bliss. Still so stagnant, you feel light headed..... suddenly a blast of energy as the spirit inside you moves your body in ways you have never moved before. You start to feel the vibe and the beat is so strong, that you feel it pounding in your head. At this point nothing but the communication between your body and the music matters. This is when you know you are listening to a good song!

Amazing!

Youíre a picture being revealed by the grace of the angels. At a pace too slow for us hasty humans, yet a pace thatís best for us. Days, months, years, seasons and the magic of heaven unravel you to me. Listen baby, ainít no mountain higher, ainít no valley lower, ainít no river wide enough baby! Just want you to know I see your light!

Nirvana

Where life is a massive chase. I own my own island, where icey jewels grow off of trees, et les plages on les blanches sands. And a ring of orange-red piercing sharp flames surround the silvery blue, silky, consuming water!!! A place of absolute bliss. NIRVANA. Where the palm trees dance to the music in the twilight. Music which blinds the moon and seduces daylight!

Crawling in the dark

It is when one awakes from the deception of colour, that we can see that black exists in everything. With the long years of sins we have managed to allow darkness to touch even the angels and the light bulb that stands above me as I write this. Let's just hope we get there in time to protect the light from heaven that shines above us!!

Why? Curiosity

When an image merely read, to create it in one's head, is finally painted on a background of reality, it stirs emotions. Suddenly it's real. Or is it surreal? It's one step closer to the image painted with pure realistic paints. Paints which were born at the event. Once one gets a hold of each and every pixel from that event, it is almost as though it is relived. The picture consumes one, with their eyes, so hungry. Suddenly your hands, your eyes, your ears, your nose and your tongue are alive as they have never been before. It is this step that may one day lead us to the enclosed world of true reality. The place where one can relive the past, and it has the significance of the presence. Maybe, just someday, this may be possible without having the world on your back, nagging you!

7/7/2002

I wish I knew how to tell you. But I'm afraid because I don't know what will happen. I wish I could see how you'd respond. My mind thinks it's stupid, and I can't understand why it's happening, but my heart's playing games on me. I wish I didn't feel this way, I wish you were here but I know it's not a good idea. I wish I could get rid of these feelings. How do I remain talking to you, and still get rid of these feelings. They seem to get stronger everyday. Someone please tell me how I can get rid of them. I wish I knew!!!

Phenomenon

Many times we tend to oversee the true complexity of human kind. We take for granted the beauty and uniqueness of every colour, every grain, every creature and every individual. Instead we critisize and get anal over the most minute details. It is simply the power of the mind, that every individual posesses that can alter a being. Control of this power lies within the individual's deepest core, unfortunately many of us don't reach it before our end. Mankind constantly seeks for power, for this is what has caused the corruption in society. Yet corruption itself has its beauty, you just need to look at it through the right eyes. The greatest power lies within each of us, yet so senselessly, instead of striving towards it, we steer away towards powers that are useless and eventually destroy us. The beauty of 70 minds in one room, starring at one screen, recieving the same rays, the same light that enters 140 eyes at the same time. The emotions that a screen can stir up in 70 minds at the same time. Each mind with its own perception. Yet again, we still manage to ignore this extraordinary phenomenon.

where's the love?

There's something I'm missing. There's a need I haven't full-filled. I need some love, why won't you show me any love? Did I do you wrong? I promise my intentions were purely for the good. I know I was a mistake, but mistakes don't always have to be bad. I'm only human, I need some love, I need to be shown love. Or is your way of showing love different from what I think it should be? When you take your anger out on me.... is that love? When you curse at me... is that love? I live in a world different from yours, maybe our languages of love are different. It doesn't matter, I just need you to find out the translation and show me love... unconditional love.

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