Mommy, Jesus Spanked Me Real Hard

Jesus: (In a comforting tone)O son, why have you come to the house of Jesus? The Boy: (Between sobs) Jesus, my Lord, I have been very bad. Very naughty. Jesus: That is okay, my child. I love everyone. Even naughty little boys. The Boy: I accidentally broke my mom's lamp and then I hid the pieces in the sugar bowl. My mommy was very angry at me. Jesus: That is very bad, my son. But I can forgive you. The Boy: I forgot to feed my kitty, yesterday. He was hungry and woke my parents up in the middle of the night. They were angry! Jesus: Yes, my son, that is very bad. You should never awake your parents during a peaceful slumber. The Boy: (More sobbing) That's not all, Jesus. I also pushed Sally in the playground today. She fell down and started crying. Jesus: That, my son, is very, very bad. You will have to do something extra special to make up for that. The Boy: Yes, (loud wailing) Father, I know. But that is not all. Jesus: Oh, Jesus. What more could you have done? The Boy: Don't take the name of Yourself in vain, Jesus. Jesus: Shut up, boy. What else did you do? The Boy: My sister took away my new GameBoy Advance. It made me very mad! Jesus: But being angry is not a sin, my child. The Boy: But then I killed her. Jesus: Oi. The Boy: What should I do, Jesus? What is my punishment? Jesus: Since you have been such a naughty little boy, I think you get the special punishment. A spanking from Jesus. The Boy: Thank you, Master.