THIRTY: DRINKING BUDDIES

| Love and other moments are just chemical reactions in your brain| And feelings of aggression are the absence of the love drug in your veins| Love come quickly| Because I feel my self esteem is caving in| It’s on the brink | Love come quickly | Because I don’t think I can keep the monster in | it’s in my skin…

[Gunning Down Romance] Savage Garden

  I didn’t follow her; I couldn’t- she had already destroyed that luxury for me. I’m starting to think all the women I sleep with will end up leaving. It’s a bit unnerving.

But dammit, I don’t regret telling her. She had to face it some time, there wasn’t any way about it.

So I just made my way back silently to my seat, knowing that physically we were meters apart, yet emotionally; we were further apart than we had ever been.

“Something wrong, J?”

“Nah man, just got something out of my system”

We landed at the airport just after midnight; the place was pitch black, and I could just make out the lights on the tarmac. A cab had already been arranged so we headed straight to the Wilchester Hotel.

There wasn’t anything to distract me the ride over; my thoughts were my only friends but at that moment, they seemed more like foes. The anger in her eyes, the pain, the slap. Walking out- it all ran through my head like a movie, and I felt everything- even the sting of the slap.

I knew there was no way I could stay by myself; so I went to D’s room to chill as soon as I dropped my bags 

“Man, where have you been?”


”Missed my flight. Got any beer? I’m all out”

I made myself comfortable on the couch, and grabbed a beer out of the fridge.

“We’ve got to go to the studio tomorrow”

“What time?”

“Eight”

“Shit” I cursed as I took another swig. D took the seat opposite me, and just watched.

“Jet lag?”

“I wish”

“Bad flight? Fans waiting at the airport? Foul looking air hostesses? Dela- ”

“Look D, I just want to have someone to drink with, ‘k?” I finished off the rest of the beer and hurled the empty bottle to the bin, but of course, it thudded on the floor instead.

“Trashing hotel rooms already, must be big” D remarked, eyebrows raised as he picked up the bottle and threw it in the bin. I went over to the fridge and grabbed two beers.

“Drink” I commanded gruffly, shoving D the bottle.

He just gave me this really irritating look of sympathy. I hate that.

“Drink” I commanded again.

I just need a drinking buddy tonight. Yep, one drinking buddy tonight and all my sorrows will be gone in the morning.

I don’t dwell on the past; well, not anymore anyway.


  ORLANDO HERALD

 APOLOGY: On the 25th October the Orlando Herald published ‘Behind the Censors: The ‘R’ Rated McLean’.

  The Orlando Herald apologises to Transcontinental Records, the Backstreet Boys management team, the Backstreet Boys and Mr Alexander James McLean for causing any inconvenience for sensitive issues raised in the article.

  The Orlando Herald staff have taken every precaution for similar incidences not to happen again.

 

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