NINETEEN: VIBRATOR


WARNING: This chapter contains VERY explicit language and extreme sexual references. It is not meant to degrade AJ McLean or the character of Minerva Prescott into cheap sensless people with no morals. They are merely the reactions of these characters to the proceeding issue.

YOU'VE BEEN WARNED!


My hotel room was littered with sodden towels, newspapers and bottles of hair chemicals, where in the midst of it all, AJ was sitting by the sink as Joe was telling the world how he wanted to get crunk tonight while I applied a thick glob of 'Country Wheat Blonde #609 to his head.

"Could you stop fidgeting and hold still for a moment?" I reprimanded as my hand slipped and some of the blonde crème got on the carpet.

"Hey, it's not my fault you haven't got a musical bone in your body" he shot hotly. "My body just responds to music" he sang arrogantly.

"Well don't blame me when the color doesn't come out right" I warned as I got a glob of blonde on my shirt.

"Shoot, this is new as well" I muttered as he fidgeted again. "Look, stop moving! I'm gonna get it all over my face"

"I need to go to the toilet" he announced as he continued to dance in his seat.

"You can't go yet, I haven't finished"

"Fine, I'll go here" he gritted.

"Okay, okay, go!" I sighed as I watched him hold onto the fly of his pants and shoot off to the peach coloured bathroom.

Honestly, unless there's a baywatch-esqe model in front of them, men can't stay glued to their seats. Perhaps women should resort to buying staple guns to keep them in place, it'd be a lot less emotionally rendering and more economical than court cases.

The tattooed one emerged moments later, with a stupid grin on his already ridiculous goateed face, zipping his fly up with one hand.

"Geezuz, you could have done that before you walked out of the bathroom!" Here was the prime example of men not only being inconsiderate, but sloppy. Boy, i wasn't wrong.

It irked me that he was grinning when he walked over. Something wasn’t right- I sensed an evil persona lurking behind that already sinister façade. He did something. Bad.

So he leaned over to my ear and whispered "I have one word for you-" he paused, pulling out something from behind his back, dangling it in front of me. "Vibrator"

How dare he search through my things! My first thought was to sock him where it hurt (believe me, not only would he be on the floor with pain, he'd be reliving WWF) but instead, I found myself blushing red with embarrassment.

"So? You're not the only one with needs. At least I don't hire hookers"

He narrowed his eyes, and I could feel the tension in the air building "Well, at least I use the real thing, not a stupid substitute" he laughed snidely.

I threw the blonde dye sodden towel in his face and pushed him with one swift arm. The chair gave way as he fell into it, startled. "At least I don't fuck everything that moves"

"I fucked you"

We stood, gaping, as the reality of the words finally sunk in. "I fucked you, hard" his brown eyes danced, divulging his evil intentions. "And you liked it"

My bottom lip had begun to quiver, and my senses were delayed. "How would you ever know, all you care about is making yourself feel good" I snapped bitterly.

"Hey, if I had a good time, I’d let the woman know- at least I'd have the decency to thank someone for a fuck"

“Thanking someone for a fuck doesn’t compensate for being an over glorified sex fiend with no morals…dick!”

“I have morals, alright, but they flew out the window when you got here!”

“Yeah right” I scoffed as my eyes narrowed. “Did I just see your nose grow a couple of inches? Oh wait, it’s just your ego soaking up the whole room!” I sneered, noting his angry eyes. I watched his fist clench closed and his lips tighten. “Why don’t you stop living behind a mask and just face the public, Alexander?”

“Oh, like you’re one to talk, Germaine Greer!” he screamed at me. God, I wanted to be out of that room. “Stop pretending you don’t feel anything and face it!”

“Face what? What do you want me to face? The truth? That after spending two months with you, you stink and oh, yeah, it’s confirmed, men really are penises with legs?!”

“Dammit Minna, if you don’t fucking face it now, I’ll slam you up against the wall and make you face it!”

“Oh yeah, I’m scared now” I jeer. I was fuming, angry… how dare he question my integrity!

“I mean it, you bitch”

My mouth dropped open in shock. I have called him a dick, a bastard, a friggin’ idiot, a chauvinistic pig, but he has never once called me anything; and man, it hurt.

"You.." I boiled, and he had pushed his limits. "Get out of here" I seethed angrily, as he got up and dusted his shirt off.

"Go, on, get out of here" I cried. He just stood there like a log, unmoving, unblinking.

“I’m goin, I’m goin’!”

"Go! get out of here, you fuckin' bastard!" Hot tears had begun to form behind my eyes, but i blinked them away. I couldn't let him see i was weak. Never.

Fury got the best of me, and boy, he was gonna be sorry he said that. I loathe him, I really do- figures though, Danner had to put me with this dick, he being such a brown noser himself. Men were bad news on top of being crass and the conclusion to my article had just jumped in front of my eyes.

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