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Monday, November 29, 2004
All About Ambiance
Topic: .: story _ tiime :.
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: Nothing
OK, I'm gonna post a story of mine on here (it's not the one inspired by Vanessa Carlton, but I think it's decent). Do me a favor and tell me what you think.

am?bi-ance (am?be-ens) n. 1, mood; atmosphere. 2,
environment. Also, am?bi-ence.

Ambiance Jane was no one special. She was the girl standing against the wall, backpack on the floor beside her while she waited for the classroom door to open. She was the girl no one looked twice at. She was the wallpaper on the bricks. Ambiance didn?t talk to any of us so-called normal kids. We carried on with our little teenage dramas and tragedies (?Oh my god! Jeff cheated on Trish? Does she know? Oh my god!?).

Her family was crazy. No one knew that by looking at her -- she was always well-dressed and never showed signs of stress. Her father was a religious nut and her mom just wanted to do everything the right way. They fought on a nightly basis (?Why can?t you ever have dinner on the table by the time I get home??
?You?re always late!? ?This house is a wreck. Can?t you do a bit of cleaning now and then, Ms. Lazyass??). Ambiance and her two brothers used to hide in the closet under the stairs when the yelling started.

Ambiance and her family showed up in Frodlaw Township in eighth grade. She was always alone that year. None of us looked at her, or said anything to her other than the occasional ?Hi.? Her tiny frame was always near the wall, even sitting in class.
She took seats near the door, near the wall, trying to be invisible. It pretty much worked. That year, we couldn?t even have told you what color her hair was. We never noticed.

It was ninth grade when things started to change. We saw Ambiance Jane show up at the front doors of Yekcal High with James Macarello, one of the gothic guys. To our surprise, Ambiance was wearing a long trench coat and had dyed her hair blue. She still looked tiny next to James, who was something like
6?2?. Small, pale and barely visible.

After that, we kept our eye on Ambiance. She went from boy to boy, every few weeks or so. The rumor spread that she was turning into the freshman slut. If she heard the rumor, she didn?t show it. Ambiance never showed much emotion. She continued guy-hopping.

In January, Ambiance Jane was absent for a week. Hillary Price, whose mother was on the PTA, said that Ambiance was in the hospital. Suicide attempt, overdose on drugs. She almost didn?t make it to the ER We snickered and went on with our lives (?Oh my
god! Trish is going out with Peter!? ?Wasn?t Peter her best friend?s ex?? ?Yeah!? ?Oh my god!?). Ambiance left our minds.

She came back the first week of February, pale as always. She said nothing about her absence. No one asked her.

In April, someone found her in the girls? bathroom with a razor, holding her arm. It was streaming with blood (?Ambiance! What happened? Are you OK??). She was sent to the nurse. Some of us kept snickering. Some of us felt a little bit bad for Ambiance
Jane.

Then it was summer and we all went our separate ways. In September, there was nothing remarkable about Ambiance. We had gotten used to her changing boyfriends every few weeks. She faded into the background again. She was invisible -- exactly what she was fighting against becoming.

By November of sophomore year at Yekcal High, we had noticed Ambiance Jane again. Bruises were showing up on her face, her arms, her sides. She was seen under the bleachers, just crying, crying, crying. They tried to get a counselor to talk to her. She just sat there, not saying a word. They gave up eventually. Ambiance remained silent. We noticed that she had the same boyfriend from September.

One of us put it together: someone was abusing Ambiance. Some thought it was the boyfriend. Some said it was her father. Others said it was her mom. By December, she had a new bruise every two or three days. They tried to arrange for a parent-teacher conference, but Hillary said neither parent answered the note or showed up.

New Year?s rolled around. Ambiance was absent again. Her parents were temporarily split up. Her mom took Ambiance and her brothers to Boston, to her grandmother?s apartment. Her grandmother didn?t want to deal with all four of them (?Judith! You are a grown woman! Take care of your marriage and kids!?), so her mom left Ambiance Jane there and disappeared with her two brothers.

Ambiance took to wandering the apartment building hallways and corridors. She made some friends, all male. They were nice to her, let her hang out with them and stuff. Then Ben invited her into his apartment. It was empty. He locked the door and told her exactly what he wanted. She went out the window and stayed the night somewhere else.

After that, it was Jack. Then Mark. Then Bryan. Ambiance Jane stopped hanging out with them. She started cutting again. She spent long hours in her tiny room, listening to Nickelback and wishing there was an escape. She started choking herself and eating less.

Her mom came back. Ambiance was in the shower, rinsing her hair. She heard her mother?s voice (?Where?s Ambiance? Where is she??) and passed out. The water poured into her nose and mouth. Her mom opened the door and found her (?What kind of care have you been giving my daughter?! What?s wrong with her?!?). Ambiance Jane?s arms were crisscrossed with scars and scabs. Her neck was bruised and sore. She was sent home and shipped to therapy.

We didn?t know any of this until later. We didn?t care enough to ask. Ambiance was just wallpaper, after all.

Ambiance was gone in our junior year. We heard she went off to the community college. Hillary says she?s mentally messed up and that she?s really in some retard hospital somewhere.

Ambiance, wherever, whoever you are, someone noticed.

I know it needs work, definitely needs work, but what do you think?


Love and Kisses, Ducki at 7:43 PM EST | Permalink | Share This Post | Post Comment |
Updated: Monday, November 29, 2004 7:46 PM EST

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