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Wednesday, November 3, 2004
I Think I'm More Coherent Now
Topic: ~ * today * ~
Mood:  not sure
Now Playing: Anything But Ordinary -- Avril Lavigne
I think I'll switch songs. *changes song to* Over and Over -- Nelly feat. Tim McGraw. Much better. I think I may be feeling a teensy bit depressed. Or perhaps that's me, still tired (I haven't slept yet).
I dunno, I feel the need to declare the fact that I am totally independant (even though we ALL know this is completely not the case). I have the need to be independant. I hate parents. I want to go live at my best friend's place. I want to live anywhere but with my dad.
I don't remember if I've ever told my "horror stories" about my dad on here before. Well, I may as well begin now.
First off, he's a religious redneck with no consideration for others. OK, he has some consideration, but not often. I think his record is something like four times in a year or so. Anyway. Where was I? Oh yes. Religious redneck, some consideration, he has no communication skills at all and he's convinced that he's always right (hence the consideration thing).
I hate the fact that he's so goddamn religious because I think he could actually be semi-cool if he wasn't all Christian and so on. He's the only person I know of who doesn't know I'm bisexual. (Well, I don't know, he may have figured it out by now. He cost me a relationship with his bullheaded ignorance.) At least, I never actually came out to him.
He thinks I'm still 12. So I may look like I am, but I'm not!! I'm fucking 16!! I'll be 17 in a few months!! He tries to control the teensy bit of my life he knows about. It drives me crazy.
OK. That's the normal stuff. A creepy little anecdote: He stands in my doorway while I'm brushing my hair and just looks at me. I know he's there, I can see him in the goddamn mirror. He leans against the dorrframe and just ... watches, stares, silently. You'd think I was naked or something. Then when I'm done brushing my hair, he'll come over to me and ... I don't know, pet me I guess is the right way to say it. He pets my hair. It creeps the hell out of me.
That's enough family weirdness. But I want out of this house.
Although maybe I should get some sleep before running off again, huh?


Love and Kisses, Ducki at 5:19 PM EST | Permalink | Share This Post | Post Comment |

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