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do not be afraid.

maybe you should go meditate. yeah, that's it; meditate. on these truths.

the first Truth: mutual acceptance of the innate foolishness of humankind, and the fact that friendship is the only way to get through life, is demonstrated by the ritual BUNNY EARS.

the acceptance of this Truth shall be rewarded by Hot Imperial Cinnamon and the Protection against Evil Bad Breath Spirits, in the form of the DRAGONFIRE.

the second Truth: See No Pringles, Eat No Pringles, Buy No Pringles. Woe betide him or her who buys this accursed product of human capitalism at a bus station because he or she is hungry and then stows the half-eaten can in his or her backpack, for when he or she is done sojourning, invariably the can will spill all over the contents of his or her backpack, soiling his or her drawing of tiger lilies. BEWARE! ::hiss:: BEWARRRRE!!

the third Truth: to reach true happiness, purity of soul, and enlightenment, one must pass through... COLD HAM! and once you transcend this earthly evil, you shall no longer fear it.

the fourth Truth: creationism is true. behold.

the fifth Truth: the story of the Green Ones.

back to the Path.