Boldly seeking my inner kender.
~Jess

Broadsword of Bad Comedy Slaying +2
What one would smite James with.
~James

Colon of Holding
Question being, what does it contain? Best not to ask.
~James (only James)

"Conceptually this is the most incestuous relationship I've ever had."
Bear, on his character's tendancy to shack up with Kate's characters.
~Bear

"Did you just shoot at me?"
Sayeth the uber Dark Jedi, shortly after our scoundrel shot at him.
~Greg

Dire Bumblebee of Doom
What I will summon if you anger me.
~Becky

Dragon Dander
A spell causes you to sneeze so hard your head explodes.
~Kate

Exude Pheremone
A feat for succubi.
~Kate

Fenryr
"Warriors... crunchy on the outside, chewy on the inside. Mages: Not so much."
~Bryan

Fellating the Giant Nerd Cock
What one does when encouraging nerd-dom.
~Bear

Ghost-Touch Condoms
When you absolutely, positively need to stick your dick in a ghost, you sick necropheliac.
~Jamie

"Go feed my man-eating slug!"
Menial tasks for a slave of an evil wizard.
~Bear

Gummed to Death by Zombie Cows
The fate of certain attacking ravagers.
~I'm pretty sure this was a collabrative effort

"Here you go, Simba, give my regards to Aslan."
In reference to Fenryr's triumph over the king of the lions.
~Jeff

Holy Perm
For that just-washed Holy Aura.
~Kate

Holy Sperm
Use for Immaculate Conceptions only.
~Bear

How to make a pirate bark
After riding a Nightmare and thoroughly singing the family jewels, hit your pirate comrade with a lit torch and kick him down a dark hallway. WOOF!
~Bear

"I am so good at putting things in my pocket!"
~Jane

"I cast 'move-over-slightly-so-I-can-see-into-the-room!'"
Oh yeah? Well I cast "fuck-you-it's-my-turn-to-see!"
~Steve

Kentucky Fried Eagle
Mmm, freedom.
~Steve

Lith is a lich with a speech impediment.
~Bear

Lord of the Rings IV
Sauron Gets Even!
~Bear

Lucas Wipe
The method of scene change used by George Lucas in the Star Wars films, also used when a particular RPG "scene" divebombs into the perverse.
~This was a collaborative effort.

Nature's Missile
Monkey feces.
~Bear and Rachel

"The only person who isn't creepy here is me."
~Findright the Gnome
When Thrace Mortivar, the dark scary warlock and his friend the awakened dire wolf ranger, were arguling about who was creepier.
~Matt B.

Plater Grain Shift
Where you turn wheat into hops.
~Bear and Steve

Rapid Reload
A feat for third level lovers...
~Steve

Star Wars Duct Tape
Sticks to everything but itself. Great for patching holes in the hull.
~Bear

Star Wars Morphine
Causes a delerium induced, partial paralyzation of random portions of the body if not properly applied.
~Bear

Summon Dire Cookie
A new spell for when you need to give someone a big cookie.
~Kevin

The fastest way to Melina's heart? Trien's fist.
Spoken shortly after Trien put his fist through Melina (his wife)'s chest.
~Rachel

Kate: So there's a tugging at my heartstrings?
Bear: Tugging? There's a fucking hunchback yanking on them yelling "SANCTUARY! SANCTUARY!"
Bear's GMing style is always a literary experience.
~Bear

"This doesn't belong to him!"
Matt, referring to the darkside lightsaber that he did not find on the corpse at Dace's feet.
~Matt

Tome of Make Myself More UBER!
50 million gold pieces.
~Kate

Transdosian Whiskey
Strongest spirits in the 'Verse. It's a great flame accellerant, rocket fuel substitute, and it's great for combat ready claymores. Strong Force-users beware: Imbibing too much of this potent whiskey may result in getting the Force drunk.
~Bear and James

"Two out of three nerds agree, odd is good!"
Stated shortly after both Bear and Steve rolled odd numbers when asked "odd or even" by the GM.
~Bear

Undead Anal Dwelling Butt Monkey Pirate of the Caribbean
Just go with it.
~Yes

Vagina Fangs
4th level alteration spell.
~Bryan

Vibro-Duck
A frozen duck with a vibration pack from a vibro-weapon shoved into it's anus.
~JP

Wetness Within
In preparation to take the massive member of the giant man, she cast Wetness Within upon herself.
~Kate

"Who's your mallard?"
What to say after you exclaim "Fuck a duck!" and find suddenly that you are.
~AJ

Women like full beards. It tickles the thighs as you go in for the kill.
If you're a dwarf you can tickle the toes too!
~Bear and Kate

You want elven catbreath!
You figure it out.
~Dan

Kai: You always think black is a fun color.
Corthian: Sometimes dark gray tickles my fancy.
~Steve and Bear

"You love evil more than you love me!"
"I love you, but I've chosen darkness."
~Couple arguing outside, and Rachel's reply...

"You're not bad guys! You lied on your application!"
~The Dark Powers of the Mists
~James on Corthian, Kai, and Maven's expulsion from Ravenloft.