This isn’t that hard-

The razor sharp shard-

Of a broken heart-

Not feeling as smart-

As I usually-

Try to be-

Feel, suffocating-

Someone has stolen-

My ability-

To breathe-

Speaking, awkwardly-

Expressing a heart felt imagining-

Replacing, my courage blindly-

Binding my motives-

For fear of the truth-

Judging the sabotaged fruit-

Telling past transgressions mixed with white lies to boot-

Spelling out actual tries,

But mixing with cries, and shoot-

Quick solute-

The outcome not clear to even you-

Stirring the ingredients into, stew-

Recipe worn thoroughly-

Fading those specific things needed-

To make a successful relationship-

The only choice left is to wing it-

Like planning a trip-

Without knowing where you are going-

Ending by growing, a creation-

Of a false presentation-

And been changing-

The equation-

In relation-

To actual reiteration-

As an echo- attacks my head-

Acting in the ultimatum of stead-

And act as I read-

And how the time sped-

on by-

Wishing I had just one,

Person on my side-

All that time I just had to bide-

Could’ve cried-

Out anything, but I kept it all inside-

But u don’t even try-

But now left asking why-

Wonderin, just what really coulda been-

Caught in a disk skip- in my mind-

And the thoughts, those evil thoughts,

That I have to hide-

Think all the time-

Of how I’m appearin in your eyes-

Whether my hair is tied, and my shoes

Combed just right-

And the steaming light- this light

Of a bright white shine-

The shock trickling down my spine-

To think I been tryin-

To catch your attention’s eye-

Wishing I was the boy who could fly-

And take you away from all these-

Evil eyes that vie-

You in such a way-

That makes you die a little inside-

So much that the twinkle in your eye-

Would wearily diminish and dry-

Out until it curls up and makes your

Inner beauty die-

You can’t make up your mind-

To pathway find-

And jerk around my life, losing what

Is left in my mind-

To drown dropping me in the,

Ocean killing all of my emotion-

Corrosion of my heart-

The peelings of the skin causing the falling to start-

The calling of the floor-

Like im missing a part-

And now I chart-

My travels through this-

Unmarked territory-

Feeling the wrath-

Of human fear-

Afraid to shed a tear-

For the knowledge-

All decisions made the hand before-

And how I borne-

My own trespasses-

Feeling the whips less lashes-

Stripping my back fleshless-

Fidgety and restless-

Losing the bestness-

Of being benevolently-

Me-

Believing-

I’ve lost the thing-

I think-

Makes me king-

The draining of the organ of my-

Imagination, such a painless culmination-

The right way-

Losing your light’s ray-

Digging my grave-

But in my chest, im feeling the spade-

As they raid my mind-

As you see right-

Through my written lines-

Spies sent throughout my-

Mind’s eyes-

By those I now despise-

For notting of realize-

Why they vied-

With me-

Start to see-

What I hear-

But my heart’s piked on a spear-

With drear-

Slow-motion, falls a tear-

Now, its not just something missing-

Its more like a canyon-

Without my lost companion-

So much missing, irrelative-

To how im running on negative-

I’m baked and live-

Some how anyway-

As I stray-

From what I chose,

To stay-

Bayed in the shadows of mystery-

As it grows-

The molded curry-

The retchedly rank smell-

Of what I cannot tell-

Is it brimstone of hell?

Couldn’t be, could it?

Now that I see-

Oh well-

Its not like I fell-

Caught under it’s spell-

Or am I?

Try to finde-

Out, but I’m blind-

Folded across my face-

These lines I trace out

The picture- maybe if I

Flip the light switch around-

And the paper on-

And as I wish for her-

I found she was a belligerent body,

Tenaciously-

Who’s been graciously-

Chasing her dreams-

Which, un-sewn at the seams-

Of the undefined things-

Under these spot light beams-

Nine hundred watt things-

Just burning and not helping to find anything-

Lost in this dark room, which seems-

Full of fiends-

And other fiendish things-

As my plane, flailingly,-

Careens-

Searching the halls and streets-

Which will take off this band?

That covers my eye lids-

They lied, as-

He cried out-

Following the crowd-

Getting lost amidst-

These kids, running amok-

Lost luck-

Feeling struck-

Tucked in the back way-

The racket ray-

Ragez blood as it-

Flows through the veins-

These eyes strains the vision

from the ears-

steers the mind toward a crossroads-

mother earth takes a fork to eat itself-

a madman jumps from the near by woods-

asked for help, I said I would-

finding his hat-

keeping up was a chore at that-

over a fallen tree, which was not yet dead-

past to guys with red-

propeller heads-

made a wrong guess-

and was hit with a foot-

by a rabbit which stood-

at the edge of said woods-

brow raised as I tried to gauge-

the scene when he offered me some Chinese tea-

told him I preferred creamy coffee-

he went crazy-

like a carpenter who’s on fire-

prior to the exit feat-

as I may repeat, a Cheshire-

cat crept upon me-

it’s a two way street-

as he began to speak-

An empty smile left for a higher reach-

Which way I must beseech-

But this creep creature just laughed as a gaggle of geese-

Through his teeth-

And like I skipped a scene-

I awoke by a tree-

Running trying to break free-

Greeted by a beautiful face-

Surprised by what my eyes had seen-

In the end someone actually cared for me-

Being beat as I was-

We decided to go back to sleep-

And another sequence of dreams begins-

If you dont get it im sorry, but i will try to explain it. The beginning explains how im lost and am raging inside like a torn sea. And then it goes into how im lost and what is influencing right now how everything is just coming at me at once because im trying to help people, but wont change for any mans pleasure. It goes into how everyone doesnt actually care no matter what they try to fucking tell me. and the end goes into how there is one person who i can talk to, lets call her angel face. angel face knows what im going through and i can talk to her unlike any one else.

You know my name is Chris, and my friend evo who i believe is a close friend of mine has a site up here and I decided that I'd give it a whack. I dont want to lead you to believe that im doing this, to be like someone else although i may not dis-like this person half as much as they like half as many of the halfless people i half- a$$edly try to be. Regardless I will not be posting actual clear journal entries as you may traditionally see them on this site; However, I will post articles of poetry I have written that indicate as to what I am feeling.

6-1-04

My fifteen minutes of shame-

Pulling against the grain-

You’d think a sign of bright red paint-

Would make you refrain-

Brush slipped and lost a letter in vain-

Stroked right, lost meaning, through this stain-

Distortion of the truth-

Through this bloody coup-

And a few too many strewn-

Across the field of these forests-

Bought a ticket to the opera process-

And listened intently to the fallen angel’s chorus-

A single meadow left to grow-

Whatever it wants-

But they hear the taunts of the other trees-

And instead of growing how they please-

They turn a little tease-

Into stone written decrees-

When it’s over and done-

And time for the next generation-

The space is gone-

Taken by unwilling participants-

Bein bold through they fronts-

And as the mountain lion hunts-

Gliding through these apple patch growth stunts-

As I walk through the class wearin my cone, crown of dunce-

Felt as though I’m locked in a thousand trunks-

To be dropped off back here-

In the out, not so clear-

To make disappear-

For fear-

Of discoverance-

cdcdcdcdcdcd

As you can see what im going through if you cant im sorry but it wasnt written for you. It only matters that im satisfied with it.

for other poems that ive written please go to--- http://sikdragon.tk

"Dont be hatin, for reeeazy"