The website formerly known as 'Magical Brendans intricate and superfluous workshop of delightful treats'
New, improved and greatly simplified. Why? Because we care.
and because you're a dumbass
Below you will find what we in the industry call "internet hyperlinks". Simply place your cursor above the writing that interests you and click the button on your mouse. Further information will then be displayed in big words, surrounded by colourful images. This website has been built to the highest standards and is now accessible by people like you. Yipee!
News, etc
Yipee! Pictures of the 2005 Gaeltacht have finally been added after Brendan got out of his bed to do something that actually resembles work! Woohoo! They'll be down there on this page for now. Hoorah and other such exclaimations of delight!
Being bored and resentful toward my need to study queens and kings and things I've decided to clean the 'ol site up. Those ever so ghastly green links have all been told to piss off and the cream of the internet crop is all that is left. You can find it all down there divided into sections and whatnot.
Time to step off this gravy train, read the update: Parting Words of Wisdom
Tales of Laddishness
The Johnston Tracts
Ten Step Guides
Miscellenouslessnessosity
Holy Shit! Totally Awesome! External Links!
The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny!
Drop everything you are doing and check this shit out!
Terms and Conditions
'Lo to everybody, all the gaeltachtees, Cian, Cormac, Rachelle, CoolMaeve, Keva (gaeltachtwee), Hannah, Catherine, Shauna agus Brendan 1, Cat & Ruth, Large Rory 1, Frances, Conor, James, Big J(hows university?), Joanne(who was on T.V!),all the "Chris"s i know, spikyChris, Johnston (who is in part responsible for quite a number of things in this site), HERChris,etc, Leah, Sarah, Sabrina(i shouldn't actually put all their names so close to eachother), Chantelle, Holi, guys from my class/school, Roy G, Quinner, Baxter, Matthew, Clenny, Lavery, JAQ, Matthew le cousine and Desy as he is so adament to be on the site...the fuckhole. This website is copyrite of "Caldwell Corp." © and all catchphrases or advertising sayings are registered trademarks ®, they are not, as some would suggest, stolen from various books, TV programmes, movies, games, rival corporations etc. Batteries not included. May have maddening effect on person(s) May cause discharge from eyes. Some readers may be offended. Some readers may not. Some readers may become suicidal due to this website. Some readers may become suicidal all by themselves. Some readers may become homocidal. This is a no smoking area. One Way website. No shoes allowed. Fire exit located at the back of the website. This website may cause invoulentary vomiting. This website may cause momentary stress. This website may result in death in rare cases. This site and all related sites are protected under the human rights act, article 19:"Everyone has the right to freedom of thought, conscience and religion";and article 20:"Everyone has the right to freedom of expression". You must be UNDER 37 to view this website. All proceeds go towards "The Caldwell Charity Fund". By entering this site you agree to the terms: "I enter at my own risk", "I enter at my friends and familys risk", "I enter at my mental healths risk" No small childrens idols allowed(eg. Barney, The Tweenies) Anarchism sold seperatley. This website contains explict violence and gore. Website may result in itchy fingers. Website may cause lack of common sense. Resale under any other scheme is strictly prohibited. No refunds given. Please examine change when you get it as it cannot be corrected later. Compatible with stupid people and smart people(Recommended). Do not recharge. Do not dispose of in fire. This notice may cause combustion of head and/or other body parts. Available in Democratic Republic of Congo only. This website contains sectarian violence. Toenails must be clean cut before entering this website. Dance/Trance/France music not permitted. Trespassers will be shot on sight. Under certain circumstances "Caldwell Corp." may gain the rights to all your possesions. Members must be badly disciplined. Designed for people with sense of humour only. After 10 day training period, members will go on to invade small countries. Long vehicles. Normal behavior will not be tolerated. All harm must be self-inflicted, failure to keep this regulation results in severe physical punishment. Website not compatible with AAA batteries. Contains small salt crystals. If website comes into contact with eyes rinse with warm, soapy water. If ingested orally do not induce vommiting, keep patient warm, seek medical attention immediately. This website does not contain tiny stickmen killing eachother with an array of weaponry like it does here. Large Italian verbs will be prosecuted if found tampering with website. Small, off-duty, Czechoslavakian traffic wardens are acceptable. Website may result in maniacal laughter. Website may cause loss of pride/dignity. This website is monitored by a large, psycopathic bear. Warning: Website is charged with 10,000 volts of electricity. No small, blue herrings named Alfred. Website may render reader unconscious. Elvis impersinators will not be tolerated. Blue hair is acceptable. Green hair is not acceptable. The website is aware of the rodent problem and is taking every possible method to take care of this situation. May contain traces of nuts. Website cannot take responsibility for food poisoning. Addiction may occur if website is in contact with readers eyes for over a long period of time. No rights reserved. We are aware of the idea shortage and are taking every nessicary measure to combat this problem. Prior to anything you may have heard this website does not cure constipation. All complaints must be sent to the following address: nobodycares@idontgiveafuck.com. Only suncream up to factor 20 allowed. No pets allowed, including Polish penguins. Please use the air-sickness bags provided. This website is sponsered by the Bolivian navy, currently on maneuveres in the south pacific. No Parental Guidance required, the children will hear the lyrics anyway. Excessive inhalation may have hallucenigenic effect. Bread fetish's not allowed. Dairy products will not be tolerated. All hatemail and death threats should be sent to ireallyreallydontlikeyou@iwant2seeyoudead.com. NOTE: This website does not accept responsibility if person(s) reading it becomes mad Russian dictator.Thank you. Share and Enjoy.
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