WIT, WISDOM, and STUPIDITY
(because everything in this world is one or the other.)
Back
Man, haven't updated in so long. Well, here's a new one for you guys, and it's not too bad.
Have you ever heard of Kid's Bop? It's these really crappy CD's where they take popular songs of the day and record some kids and these about 50 year old guys resinging them. Basically, no idea how they got started, but for some reason (sorry for that delay, my brother likes to lower the chair at this computer and I had to adjust it.) for some reason, people are still buying them. Don't get it. Private note, feeling work-ethicized at the moment. High self esteem.
Crappy Kid's Bop! They have 5 now. The 5th one just came out. Argh, how it ticks me off. I mean, what they do is they take popular songs of the day... Wait, told you that. Okay. Imagine a song where all the musical quality and passion has been stripped away, and you have a garage band made of 7 years olds performing them, with their dad singing along. Yeah, that's it. They are seriously horrible. And then, I dunno why some parents would even let their 7 year olds listen to some of the songs. Can't think of any off the top of my head, but they're not all very clean songs for 8 year olds, man.
Beside the point. Well, that kinda is the point. But they are so bad, I got chills listening to "When I'm Gone" when the "Kid's Bop Kids" sang it. I mean, they're just that bad. And then, often times they have some stupid little dance routine to go along with it, but the dance routines are pure crap. In the latest commercial, the kids run around singing, "I love Kids Bop!" and in earlier ones, the parents were all like, "Kids Bop is great for the road, and the kids love to dance to it!" Please. The people who came up with that seriously need some help.
This is really jumping topic, which is why I had the hr tag in there. I mean, I added a horizontal line to separate this from the comments above, but we had an assembly today. If I were Mr. Peeling, I probably would have no self-esteem left after it, and I'm gonna talk about another thing like that later, but the assembly was so bad. First of all, it's some 20 minute assembly on "The State of The School Address". Kinda original name, eh? And it gave forboding to how boring the speech would be. However, the entire thing was very embarassing to the school. Here's my experience, as told in subjectless predicatitive first semi-omniscient person. Or something like that.
Announcement. Call Kimmett's class to Audi. We go. Talk in hall. Hard to get in Audi, lots of people. Finally get in. Aisle seat, somehow sensing problems occuring in future. After 5 minutes realize problems are behind me in the form of two or more nameless people in my class. Won't shut up. Yelling in ear. Pushing back of seat. Leaning on my physical body in effort to talk to friend 10 rows up. Didn't realize what a difference 6 inches could make in the scheme of 50 yards. Oh well. Continuing. Assembly starts. Mitch (principal, sorry non WHS readers. If there are any of you, maybe Kenneth's friends.) Mitch, yeah, he gets up on stage. Join in pledge of allegience. Get up, take hood off (not a psycho wearing a hood, just a freezing person in a broken-heater audi. hooded person. Parents always getting them confused.) stand up, pledge goes, dumb people in back left start yelling the pledge as loud and obnoxiously as they can, either in an effort to be heard or in an effort to try and rejoin the large amount of people all saying the pledge at different speeds across the room. Probably the former, but who knows. Anyways, pledge done. Yaaay. Mitch welcomes many people, students, teachers, parents, etc. Starts talking about how awesome WHS is now. Bleh Bleh Bleh. No problems yet, excluding the idiots behind me who wont shut the crap up. Eric Mowen and I not appearing phazed by their evil screeching tones. Okay, no major problems yet. Some school photos come on, and instantly some people start talking about the lack of black people in any of the photos. Well, maybe if the black people had done Powderpuff cheerleading there may have been a bit more. Sorry to be so insensitive on the issue, but it now seems that racism can be committed unintentionally. Life is funny in these politically correct times. So. Pictures gone, Mitch makes huge error in trying to boost self esteem of students. Multiple times interrupted while telling the students that they should be proud to go to WHS. Too many people laughing to speak, then a dork yells haha at the top of his lungs. Close to the end, multiple people, including the people who had the problems with the large amount of racism in our school, just walked out of the audi. Then Mitch finishes, Mel (athletic director, and speaker of Words of Wisdom. If it were up to me, he'd read WWS everyday instead of WoW. Anyways.) Mel gets up and thanks Mitch for speaking, utters his trademark (make it a great day, or not, the choice is yours! Where have I heard this? When your powers combine, I am Captain Planet! The power is yours!) says that stuff, and then dismisses us. All at once. Mad rush out of audi. To get back to class, believe it or not. Or at least to hang in the hallways once the students realize that they now are going back to class. Mrs. Kimmett quite ticked at our class's lack of listening and social skills. Well, I think we have awesome social skills, just crappy listening skills. Woohoo.
Another morbid split. Anyways, Hilary had this weird book on suicide that a friend had given her to look at (no, she's not suicidal!! Not at all, don't worry.) So. I was looking at the cover of the book, and I was like, "Woah, this title page sucks." I mean, the front was black with a snuffed out candle, and I made a cool beat trying to type snuffed with cold wet fingers from cutting and cleaning cauliflower. It was an awesome beat. Anyways, I thought that the cover of the book could have said, "Suicide: You're Dead!" it was that morbid. Then I started to read the book, and it had some comics in it. But they weren't funny comics. They were really sad and depressing comics. Like, this one, all these old people are lined up in a waiting room, and everything has been changed so that it's an assisted suicide office. And all the magazines that people are reading are like, "Readers Die-gest" and "101 uses for a Dead Grandma" and really disturbing stuff like that. I mean, the book is really just sad, and I wouldn't recommend it to suicidal people because one, you can't understand the titles to its chapters anyways, and two, it's so darn sad.
Well, that's Ben signing off for now. Look for more of these soon! Well, that's what I said a month ago too, and this is the first. Oh well, I updated, so there. Adios!
Back
