Shazz n' Dazz
by Chris Quinlan 25.03.03


« z » shazz ‘n dazz by chris quinlan 25.03.03

You are talking to shazza@slopmail.com

dazza says: hey shazza

You are talking to dazza@slopmail.com

shazza says: wow you're up late

dazza says: oh this is my regular time :)

dazza says: do you still fell like a chat?

dazza says: feel i mean

shazza says: yes

dazza says: ok, would you like to call in a few minutes? i have to log off here ok?

dazza says: oh i mean i'll call you

shazza says: i'm chatting to a friend in broadie at the moment

dazza says: oh ok ....

shazza says: can i call you when i finish

dazza says: sure :) i'll stay online ... got some emails ... you give me a yell here on messenger when your done and i'll log off ... one phone line here is all

shazza says: although it's a pretty depressing conversation, so maybe we could just chat online

dazza says: ok, thats fine ... you chat with your friend when your done ... yell :)

dazza says: having a boibon .... slurp slurp

shazza says: hehe i'll try and wrap it up, make me one, ok?

dazza says: made a jug just in case :)

shazza says: good one, ok i'm all yours. god that was depressing, got a joke?

shazza says: what are you doing up so late?

dazza says: hmmmm lemme see .... thinking thinking .. ..

dazza says: i'm always up about now

shazza says: really? party animal?

dazza says: i work on the commodore until near 10 then cook beans .... then emails

dazza says: i keep similar hours to publicans

shazza says: so you get to sleep in then?

dazza says: yes, i sleep till about 10 but stay up to 2.30 so a normal nights sleep

dazza says: you wanna chat on the phone shazza?

shazza says: actually i'm a bit drained from that last conversation, can we do that another time? happy to keep sipping on my wine and typing though

dazza says: thats fine .... :) .... have you had a nap since your last 5 hours with your dramas last night?

shazza says: so you live where again?

shazza says: oh sorry, i did get a couple more hours sleep, then after work i veg'd out at a friends place for a few hours. so i'm ok, and i get to sleep in in the morning

dazza says: altona .... which is 15 min from town over the westgate

shazza says: that's right

shazza says: how far from st kilda

dazza says: about 20-30 min

shazza says: ooohhhhh

dazza says: i get to stkilda regularly .... espy etc ...

dazza says: is that a good ooohhhh?? hehe

shazza says: really? i drove past the espy on my way home tonight. they had chairs and tables out the front

shazza says: sun was shining down and i was dying to go sit down with someone for a drink or 6.

shazza says: had to get home though because my kid was coming back from the bastard ...

dazza says: sounds good

shazza says: and that was a "god that's a long time" oohh

shazza says: i don't venture very far from my little nest these days, so a half hour drive to me is blah

shazza says: unless it's to meet a handsome musician ;)

dazza says: about 4 songs on my tape to stkilda

dazza says: you sexy devil shazza .... im spilling my boibon

shazza says: what are you listening to in the car

dazza says: flattery gets you everywhere

shazza says: awwwwww shucks!!

dazza says: the latest ac/dc, marilyn manson and audioslave ... oh and i made an ozzy tape

shazza says: that's right, i read in your profile you were into ozzy.

shazza says: have a couple of black sabbath albums too, she's good mate

shazza says: i'm going to see moby tonight

dazza says: hey good stuff .... i haven't heard a lot, but what i hear i like

shazza says: i just got into it over summer really, got two albums and play them to death, they're great. the girl i'm going with saw him a couple of years ago in dublin and loved him.

dazza says: good stuff ... so shazza why are YOU up so late???

shazza says: i'm a bit of a night owl these days. i dont work tomorrow till 12 so i can sleep in .

shazza says: anyway, enough about me. what do you think of me:D

shazza says: joking

shazza says: is dazza short for daryl or damian?

dazza says: dazzatopher

dazza says: :)

shazza says: nice

shazza says: shazza is short for shazzatopher

shazza says: hehehe

shazza says: i think the wine's kicking in

dazza says: you stole my joke!! hehehe

shazza says: sorry i'm being a bit silly

shazza says: too quick!!

dazza says: thats alright so ami you sexy drunk devil :P

shazza says: i knew typing in year 11 would come in handy one day

shazza says: well drunk and devil yes, but don't know about the sexy bit!!

dazza says: i should go get the two cans of boibon in the fridge and join you

shazza says: go on be a devil

dazza says: you have to pronounce it boybon

dazza says: you want me to be a devil?

shazza says: is it already mixed with coke??

dazza says: its actually boybon and dry

shazza says: oh, i am impressed. thought you were a true bogan there for a minute

dazza says: sometimes coke gets a bit too sugary

shazza says: and only bogans drink it

shazza says: pre mixed anyway

dazza says: i should go get my moccos resoled

dazza says: hehehe

shazza says: why bother? half the fun is getting your feet wet when you wear them out shopping in the middle of winter!!

dazza says: thats right mate, plus my tight stretch jeans have a big hole in the arse

shazza says: sexy

dazza says: you bet :P

shazza says: bet you do alright with the chicky babes then?

dazza says: hahahaha ..... especially ones called shazza ....

dazza says: but can i call you shazza so i don't get confused

shazza says: god yeah, i'm about to jump in me torana and hoon on over that bridge and hunt ya down, ya big sexy bastard!!

dazza says: i'll be waiting on the bonnet on my commodore wearing only my wet sexy moccos

dazza says: i'll get yooos so horny you'll be slipping off the vinyl bench seat on the ride home!!!

dazza says: :P:P:P

shazza says: can't write, sorry, on the floor laughing

dazza says: i wish i was on the floor with ya babe, that's where i do my best work!

dazza says: will you be getting carpet burns or will i be getting splinters

dazza says: hehehehe

shazza says: i'm sorry you stole the show . i can't possibly compete with that.

shazza says: applause, whistles and screams

dazza says: its not a competion babe .... i wanted to cum a draw and save the screams for your 10th orgasm!!

shazza says: stop!!!!!!

dazza says: hehehehe .... shazza .... what are we doin?

shazza says: well i don't know but fuck it was funny!!!!!!! i haven't laughed like that in ages

dazza says: i aim to please

dazza says: in and out of bed and the commodore

shazza says: and please you have done.

shazza says: hehehe

shazza says: i hear drummers have got big sticks

dazza says: shazza , i mean shazza ... you gettin me horny ... i'm gettin in da commodore with my boybon and moccos and drivin to stkilda!

shazza says: only if ya bring ya big stick

dazza says: i'll show you my big stick if you dig your nails into my sexy hairy back! (L)

shazza says: oooooohhhhhhhhhh

shazza says: BABY

shazza says: ok stop you're starting to scare me now!

dazza says: you know how they make water?

shazza says: how

dazza says: theres the H

dazza says: there's the 2

dazza says: and .......

shazza says: hehehe

shazza says: you're on fire tonight

dazza says: well you wanted to be cheered up and i aim to please

shazza says: yes and thank you sooooo much, i feel like a new person.......... named shazza who's turned into a bogan, but hey

shazza says: so did you check me out or did i check you out?

dazza says: can't you remember shazz?

shazza says: na sorry dazzz

dazza says: hehehe keep away from me boibon shazz, you're pissed

shazza says: fuck off else i'll knock ya block off!!

dazza says: shazz, i'm smashed, you gotta drive, last time i gave the keys to macca he ran over me chooks!

shazza says: no worries i'll get ferret and michelle to steal a taxi and pick me up

dazza says: tell ferret to knock over a 7-11 i need some winnie blues and pick up a playboy and a donut, i got tha magic munchies from that last fukn buket bong

dazza says: shazz r u fukn larfin or fukn typing i havent got all fukn night

shazza says: fuck off i'm pakin another cone man

dazza says: well thank fuk its a cone, everytime you roll a joint ... you fukn bogart it and thhere's nuthin left for me

shazza says: floor again, sorry

dazza says: now seriously shazza .... first messaging proper and i've set the bar too high, you're going to want me to top this effort live!

shazza says: true, and you me, and i know i just won't be able to perform. but how about we make a deal to meet when we can both have a big night, get completely pissed and hang shit on every bogan in sight!!!!!

dazza says: ok that means we're going to the westside up the road here on a saturday night ....

dazza says: can you sprint?

shazza says: why?

dazza says: you'll probably need to if we hang shit on moccos at the westside

dazza says: hehehe

shazza says: so handsome, back to normal conversation now, who checked who out?

dazza says: i checked you out ...

dazza says: why? who have you checked out?

shazza says: :$

dazza says: i'm gettin jealous now

dazza says: hehehe

shazza says: i've checked out a few. even been on a date.....disaster though. good for a story sometime.

dazza says: i love stories

dazza says: go on tell me the tale

shazza says: all in good time, my friend...all in good time!

dazza says: i have one or two tales also

shazza says: i don't know about the chicks, but god there's some tossers out there on the male side.

dazza says: :P:P:P hehehe

shazza says: i've had two guys trying to shag me online so far.

dazza says: wow you mean dirty sex talk online?

shazza says: one told me he wanted to kiss me on the three n's........neck, nipples and nees!!!!

shazza says: he lives in dandenong

shazza says: obviously no good literacy teachers out that way

dazza says: the poet from mocco east! the three N's hahahaa now i'm on the floor!!!

dazza says: what was the other romeos big line ......?

shazza says: and some boring old bastard tonight who only spoke in monosyllables, and thought he could win me over by being too cool for school.

shazza says: finally he spoke in sentences, and wanted to "CUM" over

dazza says: ooo i think i spelt it that way once tonight!!!

shazza says: no i would have blocked you if you did

dazza says: didn't anyone say ..... darlin' if they say you are what you eat ..... i'd like to be you tomorrow .... ?

shazza says: love that blocker

shazza says: no but i might use that down the pub at lunchtime tomorrow

dazza says: hey which pub ..... i'll MEAT you there!!! :P:P:P

dazza says: hahahaha

shazza says: might go to the greyhound for the drag show

shazza says: ;)

dazza says: oooooo i'll drag you into my commodore hehehe .... i used an old drummers joke for a story about playing at the annual cross dressers picnic ...... "i felt a bit out of whack, while i was flamming while they were dragging ....

dazza says: flams and drags are drum exercises ... you have to be a drummer for that one

shazza says: i am a drummer

dazza says: yowza now my stick IS getting bigger!

shazza says: sorry to disappoint you. i started learning african drumming last year. loved it. but haven't done much about it since. need to buy myself a good one. do you know anything about them

dazza says: a little but not my specialty, a kit player by trade

dazza says: we should jam

shazza says: my dad used to play drums, and one of my brothers is a drummer in a blues band

shazza says: and i can sing, if i'm pissed enough

dazza says: shazz you were sexy before but now you are my love goddess!

shazza says: yeah thought i'd hold out to tell you that, didn't want you to get too horny too soon

shazza says: should see me work that stick

dazza says: ooooo , now should i be using MY block button , shazza you are dedset horn bag

dazza says: my stick works best with a bit of lipstick around it

shazza says: that's what all the blokes say

shazza says: and it's true

dazza says: i was a few steps ahead there for awhile but now the pack have caught up with me ... :(

shazza says: yep

shazza says: hey so dazza, i love your pic, very handsome, do you look as good in color

dazza says: hahahahaha ... thank you ..... i hope so ... is blushing a nice tint?

dazza says: that's what i'm wearing now

shazza says: ah yes

shazza says: oh sweetie

dazza says: so shazza, where do we catch up?

shazza says: well i turn into a pumpkin if i venture too far from st kilda so......................

shazza says: why don't you let me know when you're over here next and we can go out.

shazza says: what's a good night for you

shazza says: of course, we could meet during the day if that suits better

dazza says: how about wednesday lunch?

shazza says: ok well you're easy

shazza says: this?

dazza says: a man with a big stick usually is ;)

dazza says: yeah

dazza says: i'm gonna take you out for lunch on wednesday

shazza says: really?

dazza says: we'll pull a cone then i'll take you to maccas across from luna park for a meal deal then back to your place!

shazza says: you're a smoothie

dazza says: i work hard at it darlin' ;)

shazza says: ok so i'll meet you at circa at the prince at 12 then?

shazza says: ;)just jokin

dazza says: now you got me, do i wear my crotchless panties?

shazza says: oooohhhhhh yes please

dazza says: did you know ..... my dad ran the prince for near ten years

shazza says: no way?

shazza says: when?

dazza says: yes way!

dazza says: 54 to 63

shazza says: that's my local

shazza says: cool

dazza says: that was my first home as a bubby

shazza says: awwwwwwww !!!!!!!

shazza says: to be living there in the glory days

shazza says: jesus how old are you

dazza says: i don't remember a thing ... then dad ran the dan o'connell in carlton and thats where i grew up

dazza says: just turned early 40's

dazza says: is that ok?

shazza says: just turned early 40's? come on 40 what?

dazza says: 42

shazza says: see ya

dazza says: shit i'm losing you

shazza says: :D jokin

shazza says: no dazza you won my heart tonight

shazza says: i'm looking forward to seeing you in your moccos. if you're lucky i'll take you for a spin in me torana

dazza says: and you won my big stick

dazza says: your torana has 4 on on the floor? if not it soon will have darlin'

shazza says: na mate it's got a sdick shift

dazza says: i can't stop .... this role playing is assimilating like the borg on star trek

shazza says: whatever the hell that is, i thought only nuffies watched star trek?

shazza says: oh sorry i forgot you're old

shazza says: hehehe

dazza says: well, can't wait to shift your sdick

shazza says: hey hang on i can't on wed, what about fri

dazza says: old startrek bastard seeks stkilda hornbag with torana

dazza says: yoiks! no, saturday?

shazza says: you're avoidin me aren't ya dazza

shazza says: wanna polish ya stick before we meet

dazza says: already polished fed the chooks just before macca ran over 'em

shazza says: hang on it's ok i'll swap my wed lunch for fri so i can meet you wed, how's that sound

dazza says: you horny bitch, i can't fukn wait

shazza says: what's your home number, i wanna call and make sure you're not really a bogan

dazza says: hahahaha 9972-48531 you wanna call now?

shazza says: yeah is that ok i'll have to get off the ‘puter first

dazza says: who were you seein on wednesday ... if its that prik robbo, i'll punch his lights out

dazza says: hehehe yeah sure, i have to go offline as well

shazza says: hey fuck off he's got a bigger stick than you

dazza says: yeah but its got fosters flop and kylie from broadie gave him crabs

shazza says: hehehe talk to you in 5. not gonna wake the mrs up am i?

dazza says: nah she stocked up on prozac buttered toast a few hours ago, i'm at the computer in me jocks ..and a hankie

shazza says: cool, see ya

dazza says: in 5?

shazza says: yep

dazza says: ok (K)



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