~|*|~You Are The Only One~|*|~
It's times like these, where i sit and wonder; do you think of me? do you ever ponder? About the times we could of had, or is it just me? how did all this go so wrong? so bad? I miss you, and i think about u a lot; sometimes i think where i'd be if i had u back or still, in what position i'd be or in what spot. Do you miss me? or is that just in my dreams? i need to know for sure how u feel, not just what it seems. There's times when i think about old times and i really want u back, then there's times when i'm scared and don't want to get hurt again from the love i lack. Not a day goes by, when i don't think of you or you're not on my mind, I think about how u feel about me and who u say u love now; the truth i'm determined to find. Some way, some how, i need u to see...how much u really mean to me. Somedays i wonder, "does he sit and think about me like this? does he wonder how i am? am i the one he has to miss?" You could be feeling the same way i do now, most likely not though; i wonder what would happen if we were still together...i wish i knew this somehow. but you're the one who has to decide how you feel now days, sometimes you say you love me and we're close again; other times you go and ignore me, how do you feel out of all these ways? 2/9/03
-`-`As Days Go By, Things Change`-`-
The days pass by, they go on and on; i sit here and think about how i felt back then so long. How i truly loved you, and i'd never let u go; isn't it funny how things have changed so much since then? -funny how things work out and which way they seem to go? Yeah and it's funny how so long ago u promised, that you'd never hurt me or make me cry; well, that promise is OVER WITH now from the time u said good bye, you are greatly missed. Well, 'things change' like the common saying claims, yes they do for that is true; so many things in the past few months have changed. Things are so complicated when they don't work out, but if it's meant to be...it'd be happening right? although i say that in a state of doubt. But yet the days go by, people learn to get over things; i just haven't gotten to that part of the road yet, and it's very tough yet i do not know why. Maybe because i fell so hard and so fast, i loved you so, so much! i just don't know if u felt that way too, though your words said so and also said that it would last. There's times in my mind where i don't care if i get hurt again or end up heartbroken; but then i realize that it hurt way too much, a heart's not to be played with, it's a symbol...a token. But as the days go by, things have their ways of changing, everyone will realize that sooner or later; sometimes it may hurt, but other times it's for the best; everything will work out after all the rearranging. 2/9/03
I love his cute laugh, and his sexy, comforting tone; I love the way he makes me smile, just online or even on the phone. But I hate the way I cry, After I talk to him every single time; I miss him so much more than he'll ever know, how can I stop this endless crying? I can't get over him, no matter what I possibly do; Nothing can stop me from thinking about him, if only he knew... How much he truly means to a girl like me, and how much I think about him and cry; I wonder if he feels the same about me, I ask myself why I still love him... why? The complication is starting to get to me, I need to be with him and feel that safety again; The feeling I get like nothing can bother me when I'm with him, I want that feeling, that comfort, once more to begin. I don't think he knows how much he actually means to me, I think about him non-stop; everyday the memories we once had are on my mind; so I think about them and cry about how much I wish, that was still happening and into the past I could hop. He's like a comfort pill for my body, when I'm with him I feel safe and secure; nothing is able to get me, he'll keep me safe, no pain will I have to endure. I love the way he makes me smile, and I love the way we talk so personally; I have to be with him, can't u see this? I can't take it much longer, physically or mentally. I love the memories I have to think back on, I miss them so much it makes me happy but yet so sad; happy to know I spent them with that one special guy, but sad to know he's gone and the fact I GoT iT bAd. I love everything about him, there is possibly no flaw; he's so funny, so caring, so kinda and cute, there was nothing wrong or bad about him that I ever saw. But he's gone now and I have no idea waht to do... I'm so lost and confused now days, I find myself thinking about him on and on, over and over again; he gives me that flutter in my heart... how does he feel? the way I feel? or some other ways? I wish I knew the answer to this question, I wish I could see right through to the transparent answer of it; I miss him so much, I wish he felt the same but maybe he does... maybe all these pieces to the puzzle of love do fit. But love is blind like they say, But he has something that no other person features; It's that certain something that makes me happy and cozy inside, there's a special feeling I get from him.. different that other creatures. In my heart though, for him there will always be a warm spot; never will I forget him or the way he makes me feel, everything he has ever told me, i have never forgot. 3/9/03
You know time and time again, I've tried to forget u; but I jus keep coming back to da memories we had, thinkin aboutcha now days is da only thing I can do. I love how u make my smile stretch from ear to ear everytime I talk to u, u have dat sumthin else no one else does; the think I want... the thing upon which I am glued to. See, there is no one like u in this world, no one else I want; only u, nobody eles can take that place u fill, the memories of u still live within my mind, they still lurk... and haunt. Can't cha see, I can't letcha go, there's been others who have tried to fill that spot u left behind; no one can, I need u, I can't getcha off my mind. And yeah, it's been a while since we was together, but when we talk, it's like old times; we laugh, joke, takl personally... is loving u a crime? If I can't have ya, though... I think I'll just be single forever; nobody makes me feel as happy and secure as u do, I'll forget cha, never. I hope u feel the same about me, I think there's a part of u that duz; but ya never know witchu nowdayz; ;) if not yet now, is there gonna be a time again that we'll share love? Just remember this, I love you for all eternity. I'll neva forget cha for all time, u mean anything and everything to me. 5/4/03
It's not fair, why do we have to be so far apart? it'll get better soon, don't let the distance get to us, what keeps us close is the love from the heart. I really wish i could be with u, i just wish we could be together; i would give anything just to spend a very few short minutes with you, i would go to wherever you are, any distance, even through rainy and cold weather. You're like the only person i've gotten hooked onto so fast, it's because u have that something no one else does; u're sweet, caring, funny, and just everything and more, before u showed up... so sad and lonely i was. U already mean a lot to me, and i hope i mean the same to u; so hopefully what we got goin on lasts a long time, cuz.. without that, I dunno what i'd do! 4/22/03
Crying, crying... never ending tears, when will they seem to come to an end? They just keep flowing, no more fears. Once more in time, my <3heart<3 bends. Help me please, or let me be here all alone crying my heart out. Sadness, hurt... confusion... going no where without a doubt. Tears are the way my pain seems to come to a close. No longer should you worry... or until the pain builds up again. Here come the tears... once more, my vision becomes blurry... Crying
