Confessions-Chapter 1

"Wow, this is amazing," she thought to herself, "I wish I could stay here forever....." And she would have, that is, if the alarm clock didn't go off. It was then Jane O'Brian realized she had that dream again. You know, the one where you're all snuggled up with the one you love. She reached over and shut the alarm off. As she laid back down and stretched she tried to remember the details of the dream. "Oh well," she thought, "It was just a dream and I'll see him in about an hour." Jane was lucky. Unlike most girls her age, fifteen and a sophomore in high school, the guy in here dream was actually her boyfriend. She met Zach Spencer the year before and had been dating him for nearly a year. She finally pulled herself out of bed and walked to the bathroom to take a shower. "Yay, Monday again." she muttered to herself as the warm water streamed down her body. As she picked up her razor to shave her legs she spaced out, as she often did while thinking. She pushed back memories of herself and razors. This was not of her fondest memories. Although she hadn't cut herself for almost a year and a half and nobody besides one person knew she was still ashamed of it. "Thank God those scars faded." she thought to herself. When she finished showering and dressing she looked at herself in the mirror. She never thought of herself as pretty, although she knew she wasn't ugly. Jane was more or less a plain looking girl with dark eyes and dark hair that just came down to her shoulders. She hardly ever wore makeup of any kind, and only wore anything besides jeans and a t-shirt when she had to. At about 7:00 she said good-bye to her mom and walked to her bus stop. It took about a half hour to get to school, but it went by fast because Zach always sat next to her. "So, how are you?" he asked when she sat down. "Okay I guess....I had that dream again."~~ "Oh, really?"~~ "Yeah." She smiled as he took her hand in his, one of the many things he did that she loved. When the bus pulled in front of the school she put her back-pack on and stood up. "You going to meet me by my locker?"~~ "Zach, I don't know why you bother asking, you know I'm going to."~~ "I know, I just like hearing you say it I guess." After she had met him and kissed him goodbye she walked into her first class of the day, geometry. "What did I do to deserve anything that involves numbers this early in the morning." she thought to herself. After geometry was band. It was her favorite time of the day until the new director came along. On her way to the band room she met up with her best friend Carrie. "Oh boy, time to deal with the world's most unqualified band director on the planet!" she said to Carrie as they walked toward the band room. "Hooray!!!" Carrie said, "I really hope this woman is gone soon."~~"Yeah, me too." Jane and Carrie had been best friends since the beginning of eighth grade. "So did you break up with Joe yesterday or what?"~~"No, I just don't have the heart to do it."~~"Carrie!"~~"What?"~~"You really have to stop being so nice."~~"Eh, what can I say?"~~"How about, 'Joe, it's over'"~~"Shut up." Carrie was the type that just can't seem to let go. I guess you could say she had a big heart, or that she was too nice when it came to breaking it off with people. After sitting through a poorly conducted Sousa march for and hour and a half it was time for biology, then lunch. When lunch finally rolled around she walked to the cafeteria with Kassy and Mary, also members of the band. She sat with them along with Patty, Bobby, and Katie. There was also a kid that sat with them that was a total mystery to the group. All they knew about him was that his name was Claude, he was a freshman, in special ed, and that for some reason the cafeteria monitors sometimes gave him free food. Discussion amongst the group was mostly about band, seeing how everyone at the table, with the exception of Claude, was a member of the band. Her last class of the day was English, which was he favorite because Zach and Carrie were in her class. She also like the teacher, whom everybody else didn't like much. Mrs. Clark was very smart. Smart to the point where it was scary, and she liked to prove people wrong and torture her students. But Jane didn't mind, she always seemed to like the crazy teachers that everybody else hated. Before she knew it, the 2:30 bell rang and dismissed school for the day. She walked out of the class room following Zach, and being followed by Carrie. "Are you riding the bus home?" Zach asked. "Yeah."~~"Okay, I'll see you in a few minutes." She walked back to the instrument room (a part of that band room where things are stored and also where most of the band members kept their books and such) with Carrie. They usually met up with Joe on the way there, but he didn't appear to be at school that day. After getting all of her stuff together and saying good-bye to her friends, Jane walked to the bus and sat down by Zach. "Hey there." he said as she sat down. "Hi."~~"So, how was your day?" ~~"Okay I guess, your's?"~~"Pretty good. Are you babysitting today?"~~"I'm not sure, it all depends on when my mom gets home."~~"Okay, call me when you get home?"~~"Alrighty."~~"Okay, talk to ya in a few." With that Zach got off the bus. Jane's ride home was about fifteen minutes longer, which didn't bother her much, it gave her time to think to herself. After a while the bus stopped at the corner on her street. She got off and started walking home. When she got to her house she walked up the path leading to her front door, placed her key into the lock, turned it, and walked in. After slipping her flip-flops off her feet she walked upstairs to her room and set her back-pack on the floor. "I'm glad I have the house to myself for a while." she thought to herself. She walked down the stairs to get the phone and called Zach. "Hey you", he said when he answered, "what's up?"~~"Not a whole lot, I just got home."~~"Cool."~~"Yeah, I've got the house to myself."~~"Ohh, too bad we're good kids, other wise I'd come over."~~"Yeah", she responded laughing. She spent about a half hour talking to him, and afterwards she made some Mac-N-Cheese for herself. She usually didn't eat the school food, so she ate when she got home. When the Mac-N-Cheese was done, she sat down at the kitchen table and thought to herself, "Sometimes I think it actually is too bad Zach and I are good kids, it gets kind of lonely here...Oh great, forty-five minutes until boogers number one and two get home...I hope Mom gets home so I can sleep...Why don't I sleep well anymore? I wish I could figure it out...I wonder if Dad is coming over today...I wonder where he slept last night...Is he even awake yet? Why do I miss Zach already, I just saw him at school...this love thing is very strange..." The whole "love" thing was very strange to her. Zach was her first real boyfriend, and caring about someone as much as she cared for him scared her sometimes. Before she knew it her forty five minutes of peace and quiet were over. Jamie, who was ten, and Lexi, who was nine, walked in and already gave Jane a headache. Almost everybody had annoying younger siblings, but they were somehow worse, and ever since their dad moved out, a total of six times, they seemed to make a point to make life harder for Jane than it already was. They argued with her about everything. They never listened. As soon as her mom got home, Jane retreated to her room and fell asleep for a few hours. After she woke up she went downstairs and ate dinner with her mom and sisters. Her mom gave the usual "How was your day?","Is your homework done?" and she and Jane cleared the table and did the dishes. After all the dishes were clean and dried, Jane put on her pajamas, brushed her teeth, and laid down in her bed. "Another end to another day." she thought to herself. As she laid for hours trying to fall asleep she thought of Zach and eventually feel asleep.