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All articles and commentaries
written by NotSoSnowWhite (aka Lori Roache)
Feature Article
Weight Loss and Family Sabotage

Have you ever felt as if your family doesn't support you.  Like they don't actually want you to succeed.  The support of those around you is often a deciding factor as to whether or not you will stick with your new lifestyle choices.  So lets step back and take a moment to examine family and sabotage.

First lets look at the different types of saboteurs.  They come in all shapes and sizes, and despite their seemingly well intentioned encouragement, your friends and family may actually be making it harder for you to achieve your weight loss goals.  Some of these are as follows:

The supportive spouse is behind your weight loss efforts one hundred percent, but doesn't think twice about gobbling down pizza or some other fattening food right in front of you while you are nibbling on a salad.  He/she isn't being as supportive as they could be.  It is a likely fate that by the end of the day, you have joined him/her and you have wandered off your weight loss plan.

The motherer's biggest weapon is the ability to coerce you into having just one more piece of cake.  The phrase, "Oh, come on, one little piece isn't going to hurt," often comes from the motherer's mouth.

Lastly, there is the watchdog. The watchdog is a friend or relative who keeps track of everything you eat and finds it mandatory to comment on your choices.  To some people this may sound like a good idea, but this kind of pressure can breed negative feelings about your health plans and can make it less
likely for you to stick with it.

There can be many reasons that your family and friends sabotage your new lifestyle choices.  Most sabotage is not malicious, and it is often unconscious, but the end remains the same -- your plan fails. Your significant other or your family may be nervous or scared.  They may feel that you will change if you get smaller, and may not be the same person that you used to be.  Jealously is definitely another reason for sabotage.  Envy makes a lot of people to do a lot of stupid things. Another person who is struggling to lose weight often unconsciously does not what you to succeed if they themselves are not.  It can often make that person feel badly about themselves. 

No matter what the actual reason for sabotage is, there are ways that you can aid your weight loss plan. Lets consider a few now.  You can recruit your spouse or family members to follow the plan with you.  You will both reap the health benefits. If you are unable to sway others, ask them to be thoughtful of your efforts.  For example, if there are foods that he/she wants to eat but you can not, get them to put the food away in a spot that you don't know about. Also, if there are special foods that you have purchased to assist you in weight loss, tell others about them and ask them to leave those foods alone.  If there is someone in your life who's meddling goes too far, for example the watchdog, tell them that you are going to succeed this time, and that you would like to see them support you an any way they can. Friends and family need to understand that everybody can fall off the wagon, and it
is often at precisely that time
that you will need the most support.

Having support in your weight loss journey is critical in achieving success. Your family and friends can be a big part of that.  So, discuss what lifestyle changes you will be making in order to reach your weight loss goals.  Ask your family and friends to be cheerleaders, and make sure you share your successes with them. Let them know that you are serious about this new healthy plan and that you need their support. You need their love and encouragement, and not their negative comments and ridicule. One of the coolest ways to get your family to see eye to eye with you  is to set aside a jar. Put a dollar in it for every pound that you lose, and inform your family that this money will be used for a celebration when you have reached your weight loss goal. They get to see right in front of their face the progress you are making.

It is unrealistic to face the challenges of weight loss without the support of loved ones. In our society we are faced with an onslaught of saboteurs. Everywhere that you look, there is a bombardment of things that can destroy your weight loss efforts.  From the friend who tells you that "You don't need to lose weight, you are fine the way you are," to the mom who says "just one more helping, it wouldn't hurt," you need to take control. Ask for the help that YOU want and need, making sure that you are specific in defining the role that you expect your family and friends to play. Most of all believe in yourself no matter what anybody else says or does. You are worth it.


HOW TO . . .

It's kind of like crashing into a brick wall. The feeling you get when you hit a plateau is unmistakable. The dieter feels that they have worked so hard, yet in spite of that, they have stopped losing weight.  Feelings of anger, disgust, and frustration usually follow. There are many reasons for hitting a plateau. Your body may now require fewer calories to function as you lose weight. You body many need time to adjust. You may need to change repetitive exercise routines, etc
The majority of those who try to lose weight have hit one of these plateaus, but now there are ways that you can kick start your body, and in the process leave that dreaded plateau behind.

1.    Do not overdo calorie restrictions:  If you restrict caloric intake too much then your body will actually fight back.  Your body's metabolism will compensate for this by slowing down and in turn you will halt your weight loss. The best way to lower your calories safety is to make sure you don't lower  your caloric intake to less than 1200 calories. For most people, any lower and it will start to go down hill.

2.    Water, water, water:   Drinking water is one of the principal components of continuous weight loss. Increasing water intake helps flush out harmful toxins and fat.  It can also help you feel full so that you are not eating unwanted calories.  In fact, drinking water itself burns calories.  So, raise your glass... here's to water.

3.    Re evaluate:  Re evaluating where you are in your weight loss journey is often one of the biggest steps in beating the plateau.  It is
wise sometimes to take a couple of days and step back from your efforts to lose weight to see where you really are.  By doing this, you can see if, by making changes in your lifestyle, you can increase exercise or reaffirm your motivation to lose weight. You may realize that you are not following your program as closely as you did when you started and it was new.  It is something like recharging your batteries.

4.    Ignore the scales: It isn't always wise to believe what you see when you look at the scales.  Everyone's body is different.  Measuring your body is a better way to see if you are still making progress, even when the scale says that you are no longer losing pounds. You may not have hit a plateau at all. Put it this way, a fit 180 pounds looks and feels better than a not so fit 180 pounds. 

5.    Strength training: This is perhaps one of the best ways to get through a plateau.  It is a very effective method of weight loss assistance.  The added muscle helps offset the lowering of metabolism that comes with dieting and weight loss.  If you are afraid of weight training because you don't want to bulk up, then don't be. Smaller weight loads and more repetitions will give you the desired effect you are looking for.

Remember, above all, weight loss is a lifestyle change and it is not going to happen in a day and it is not going to be easy.  It is all of this hard work and dedication, though, that makes it all worthwhile at the end.  We have all found the wall called plateau, as well slammed into it, but it is up to us to take out our chisel and picks and destroy that obstacle.  We can do it.  It may take time, but we will prevail.



Believe You Can Do It

Never say, "I'm beaten,"
For better or for worse.
Never say, "I'm defeated,"
Or you'll never quench your thirst.

No one's ever perfect,
Losing is in style.
So accept your defeat acquiescently,
And take it with a smile.

Never give up, never look back,
Be always on your feet.
Just say, "I must, I can and I will,"
And success will be your treat.

In life there are many chances,
It's always on the run.
So keep on moving, hoping and trying,
Until one day, you know you've won.
        - author unknown
               Unknown by me                    anyway  :o)




In every months issue, "NotSo's News" will shine the spotlight on one individual who walks along with me in this weight loss journey. The article will tell about the persons background and maybe we will get a glance into their lives and see who they are on the other side of online. We will learn how they can inspire the rest of us to do our best as we all work together towards achieving our goals.

Darlene (a.k.a Mickey Mouse) is known by many as a sweet, generous and giving person. This twenty eight year old retailer from Canada loves country music, she enjoys camping and the outdoors. Darlene would like to become a mom someday but for now she lovingly takes care of her supportive fiancee, Mike. She is the youngest of four children and is a self proclaimed family gal.

Mickey Mouse is following a healthy eating plan that was suggested by her dietician. She has her goals set high and is a firm believer of the motto, "Forgive, Forget, Move on." She is a thoughtful and humorous person who's insight and tips offer us all encouragement. Her messages always make us smile.  When she needs a little time to herself, she says 
to sit back and relax and take time to look at the things that really matter. You need to see the positive no matter how small. You must find the positive through all the negative.

Here's to a strong woman, and wonderful member and great friend. Darlene is a gal like no other. So lets get up from your chairs and get ready -- do the Mickey dance. ("Oh Mickey, you're so fine, you're so fi..."  Tee hee, I couldn't help myself.)

EDITORIAL RANT  - The Bottom Line

Who said that the perfect woman looks like a super model.  NOT ME. Society and the media paints perfection as tiny and small but that is no reality. All the Jennifer Anniston's of the world do not add up to anything if you don't have heart and confidence in yourself. Whether you are a size two or twenty-two, you should stand up tall and be proud to be a woman, a fighter. The media is far too quick to tell us that the perfect woman should be just this height, just this size, and have just this color hair. Worse, we are far too quick to believe them. Every time a woman looks in the mirror, she does so with a mental checklist written by the world in which we live. We look straight into that mirror, and in our own minds we are weighed, measured and found wanting; but take a closer look at the real world.

Isn't much more of the population our size, and not
the so called perfect size? The ironic thing is that this same media falls all over itself to reassure us that real beauty is on the inside, and then shows us a commercial for meal replacement shakes being drank by a statuesque blonde wearing a size four bikini. And look, here's an average appearing young guy walking into a bar. Even though he's only Joe average, we accept him as he is, because it's his choice of beverage that will make him popular, not his appearance, right? But watch as he sits down at a table next to a bunch of girls -- all slender blondes, brunettes and redheads, with the cutest little tank tops and daisy duke shorts. Flashing smiles and batting eyelashes every one, but where are all the real girls? Where is the average looking girl wearing the size twenty sun dress. Mixed signals much?

Enough is enough, it's time to be proud of who we are, not what size we are. I once read a really good line that said, "Who you are is what you do when it counts." So let's all judge ourselves and each other on what we actually do when it counts, how we treat the people around us, and not on whether we eat another bag of potato chips or one more piece of chocolate cake. And that's the bottom line cause Not So said so.


So! What do you think. Please drop me a line and let me know.
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