Insane Brain

                                                            

                                                                                                                                                                                                                 

Sshh. Let me fade for

these few minutes with

an insane brain.

Thrashes and gashes,

physical pain.

It’s a way to touch outside,

when it’s trapped inside.

So I scream sometimes to think,

what families steal.

Oh God I don’t know what’s real,

or what’s mine all this time.

I swear a psycho-ano can mix logic lingo in a trough

to make believe you’ve pulled it off.

But I don’t think so.

I don’t care today, if I let it show.

I swear I’ll try not to fear,

or hear what they can see.

Just accept what it is about me.

 

Pretend you don’t notice, keep talking,

Insane Brain has a way of stalking.

It’ll come back when I least expect it.

I wait for it to be over and just let it.

 

But when my mind is back on center,

and the sands shift back to better.

And the shores are healed of the blemish,

so no one has to feel sick and squeamish

about an insane brain,

then ugly can disappear

like moisture, water and the fear.

The Evening heat can evaporate

 my suffering so I can tolerate,

you know what!

 I look forward to that.

But my mind won’t realize at,

what time my insane brain is calmly phenomenal

and simply blankly normal.

 

But in that bliss blank second I  seize

when I want to squeeze

the place that aches,

in that makes

the blinding fire on dark eyes.

And touches tingling thighs.

But after when I sit alone I can’t ever distinguish

between the nauseous or the feverish.

                                  

 

*Selves*

July 5, 2000