You Can Never Go Back

Author: Sunnycouger (foolofatook_@hotmail.com)

Rating: PG-13

Disclaimer: You all don't honestly think that I own any of this do you? Roswell and all its characters are property of Melinda Metz and Jason Katims..I just take them out to play sometimes...

Category: CC

Summary: This is a future fic when the aliens get a chance to go “home” and the story follows each of their reactions to the news and their final decision.

Authors Notes: Follow up to When It's Time To Leave Home and The War.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Bridges Chapter 9

The sound of children's inane chatter echoed around the walls of the Crashdown cafe. The fact that there was only 6 people inside seemed amazing to Max Evans considering the amount of noise there was. But everyone seemed to be having a good time. The children were having a blast talking to their grandparents and Liz was smiling broadly as she and her mother bonded over the experience of parenthood. Things were going well and for the first time since he had arrived here tonight he was feeling totally relaxed.

“Max? Max, can you hear me?”

Max snapped out of his reverie and turned to see Jeff Parker talking to him.

“Jeff, sorry...I was just...”

“A million miles away? I know the feeling. C’mon, I want to talk to you about something in private. Lizzie? Don’t waste a great night by getting all stroppy, Max is a big boy and I’m pretty sure by now he knows that I don’t bite. So relax ok? Ok, good.”

Max got out of his seat and smiled at his wife reassuringly. Liz was terrified of anything going wrong tonight so he wanted to reassure her.

“I’ll be back soon Liz. Watch the kids don’t fall asleep on the floor. It’ll be impossible to get them up.”

With that Jeff ushered Max upstairs to the apartment away from his daughter, wife and grandchildren.

Nancy looked at Liz who was staring at the door her husband and father had just disappeared through.

“C’mon Liz. He’s only away upstairs, your father loves Max, I wouldn’t worry. Do you want a coffee or something to wash the pie down? It was maybe a little dry, I should have called Amy and got her to make one...”

Liz smiled genuinely at her mother, she must have been so nervous tonight and she was trying so hard to make everything perfect. The least she could do was to try as hard.

“The pie was fine mom...but coffee would be great. But you...stay here with the kids. I’ll...I’ll go and make it.”

Nancy looked at her daughter gratefully.

“Are you sure?”

Seeing her daughters nod she embraced her in a hug.

“Thank you Liz.”

“No...no problem mom. I know they will be safe with their grandma.”

With that Liz walked through to the kitchen and once she was certain she was out of sight she leaned against the wall and took a deep breath. It could only get easier now. Hopefully. As the sound of her kids laughter drifted in towards her she involuntarily smiled before she walked on and made the coffee. Things were going well. Well, down here things were going well she thought. God only knows what her dad was doing to Max upstairs.

Upstairs in the flat Jeff and Max sat at the kitchen table.

“Can I get you a beer Max?”

Max shook his head no...he still had a hard time living down the high school incident when he and Kyle got a little the worse for ware after a drink.

“No...thanks, but I’m driving.”

“That’s good. That’s responsible behavior. That’s what I like when it involves the safety of my daughter and my grandchildren. I wouldn’t want anything to compromise that. I would do anything to ensue their safety...”

Max looked at Jeff as he spoke. Max gave him his full attention as he spoke, knowing that Jeff meant every word of it.

“So would I. I’d do anything to make sure they were safe. Anything. So you don’t have to worry...they are my life. And I’d protect them with mine or anyone else's life.”

Jeff looked at the young man who was speaking so earnestly at his father in law, desperately attempting to make sure he understood what he meant.

“Good. That's what a father should do. C’mere, I want to show you something before we go back down stairs to the ladies.”

With that Jeff rose and started walking towards Liz’s old room. Max looked on quizzically before following.

“Liz’s room? What do you want to show me in here?”

“That’s a good question, over here. See this telescope? We got Liz this on her 12th birthday. Its a little bit old now but it done the job back then. My daughter always had a love of the stars. Not so much the beauty of them...more the possibilities of what was out among them. Back then Alex and Maria joked that she would end up marrying an alien. Can you imagine that? Living in Roswell and then marrying an alien?”

At that point Jeff turned his full attention to Max who was feeling decidedly uneasy as the conversation progressed. He forced out a gentle laugh as Jeff forcefully laughed.

“Marrying an alien? She...never told me that. That’s pretty funny...”

“Yeah, it is isn’t it? I’m pretty sure we would have noticed if that happened don’t you?. Anyway, that doesn’t apply to you right? I mean if you were an alien you would be off fighting interstellar battles for years on end or something right?”

“There’s no such thing as aliens...so I’m pretty certain that I’m not...”

“I didn’t think so. It doesn’t matter either way, my point is...you disappeared with my daughter and grandchildren for 4 years. I don’t care if you give me documentation or eye witness accounts. You and me both know that you were not doing aid work during that time. I don’t care where you were as long as you understand that the next time you disappear with my daughter I will make sure you suffer. No matter what kind of calls I have to put in to whoever I need to. Is that clear?”

“Where exactly do you think we were Jeff? And, for the record. They are my family as well and as long as Liz and myself are in agreement I’ll take them where to hell I like. I don’t appreciate thinly veiled threats disguised as fatherly pride.”

Max glared at Jeff as he spoke almost daring him to challenge him. Jeff glared right back.

“That's your mistake then...I didn’t want them to be thinly veiled threats. They’re guarantee's.”

“I’m sorry you feel that way Jeff. I love Liz...I always have. I’m sorry that we disappeared without telling you. But, we were doing aid-work. And any other ideas you have are coming from your own imagination...but I don’t want there to be tension between us.”

Max looked intently at Jeff. Neithers voice had been raised in the course of the increasingly heated conversation. This was stand of that no-one could win both with their own ideas about who was in the right. Was it Max looking out for his children's life or was it Jeff...wanting to protect his daughter?

“I like you Max. I always have ever since you came into my daughters life that September. I know that you are different. I know that you are both lying to me. But most importantly, I know you love Liz. I don’t care who or what you are...as long as she’s happy. Ok?”

Max sighed, deep down he wished he could clear the air by divulging the truth to Jeff. He couldn’t blame Jeff for being distrustful with all the half-truths that he had heard over the years. Deep down he must have twigged at one point that something was wrong, but not knowing the facts had sowed doubt in his mind.

“That's fair. And for the record Jeff, I like you to. No matter how our opinions differ, we both want the best for our families.”

“That’s right. That’s all I want. Now, c’mere...lets check out the hockey results before we go down to the ladies...you’ve missed some great games when you were away...”

“I don’t suppose we actually won anything did we? That would be typical...”

The older man put his arm around the younger mans shoulders and guided him over towards the tv. No matter what Jeff Parker thought about the young man sitting beside him, he loved him like a son; even though he drove him crazy sometimes.

Nancy Parker looked on at the two children playing happilly in front of her as her daughter called in from the kitchen. This was the 4th time she had made coffee tonight and each time she left Nancy with the children. Nancy knew that this was her daughters effort to make her mother know that she trusted her and she appreciated it. She looked at the two 4 year olds; Alex and Mari were clearly getting drowsy now, they were yawning constantly and Liz had given up the thought of getting back to the Whitmans tonight. Mostly due to the fact that Max and her father were now apparently totally engrossed in a hockey match. Nancy sighed as the children found one final energy burst and began to run about. As she tried to persuade them to calm down quietly without alerting Liz, Mari ran into the stool at the counter and it wobbled and began to fall on top of her. Nancy jumped from the seat and was about to catch the falling stool but before she could reach it she saw a green light surround the child. She stood, momentarily dazed as the falling stool seemed to hang in mid-air until the child had moved from harms way and the green light dissipated instantaneously. She looked on in wonder at the two children who were now standing side by side with the boy looking at his sister. What had just happened? What was special about these two children?

“Mom? Mom? What's wrong? I heard a crash...are you ok?”

“L...Liz? Liz, sorry no...Mari just knocked the stool over...that’s all. Everything is ok...”

Liz looked at her mother who looked visibly paler than she had ever seen her and then she looked at the children who were standing a few steps away. They both looked guilty...

“Mari? What happened?”

The little girl looked first at her brother and then at her mother and finally to her grandmother. She hadn’t technically done anything...Alex had made the stool not fall.

“I ran into the stool and knocked it over and...”

“And luckily she didn’t get in the way of it or else she would have been really hurt. God Liz, she was only playing. You knocked over a lot more than a stool when you were 4...”

Nancy turned to face Liz and smiled at her daughter who was still looking at the little girl and boy suspiciously. She couldn’t afford Liz to get a reason to shut her out again. She needed her. She needed her family.

“Well, since you guys are apparently staying tonight...”

“You know mom, I think I'll just see if Max feels like going tonight. This place is a bit small for 4 more people to stay...”

“Liz...Max is watching the game with your dad. Your dad missed him you know? And I...I missed you...the kids can sleep in your old bed and you and Max can sleep on the foldout. Its just one night...”

Liz sighed. She knew something had happened when she had left the room, she just didn’t know what. She really needed to talk to Max away from here...but seeing her mothers hopeful expression she couldn’t really say no. She walked towards the children and took their hands before walking towards the stairs.

“Ok...alright. But lets get these two to bed...I wish I had their energy sometimes...”

“I know...it’s amazing how much energy they have...”

Nancy quietly added as she looked on...they certainly had energy all right. But what should she do about it?

Michael and Maria sat in silence around the dinner table. Michael barely looked at her and she sat uncomfortably looking at him ignoring her. He hadn’t said anything about what had happened earlier and she hadn’t asked him about it. The silence was deafening to her and she realised she would rather have him shouting at her than have him sitting there in silence and in pain.

“Ok, Michael this has gone on far enough. Are you going to tell me what happened here or will I call Isabel and ask her to come over and explain?”

“Maria...leave it. I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Tough...I do. Now something clearly happened and it upset you so I deserve to know...”

Michael stood up from the table and walked to the counter. Why wouldn’t she leave this alone? He knew why...she cared about him and wanted him to tell her what he was feeling. The trouble with that was that he didn’t know what he was feeling himself so he had no idea what he should say to her to make her understand.

“Michael!”

“Maria will you please just leave it alone. I told you I don’t want to talk about this tonight so can we just leave it...”

“Why are you shutting me out of this? I only want to help you...”

She stood up and walked beside him and took his hand in her own...how could she make him understand?

“I know you do. But you can’t help with this Maria. I have to work this out for myself, and that doesn’t mean I’m shutting you out.”

He forced a smile at her and she nodded, letting him know that she understood before reaching up and kissing him tenderly before wrapping herself in his arms.

“I understand. I just don’t like to see you hurt like this...but we’ll deal with it another time.”

“Thanks.”

He reached down for another kiss and their lips had barely touched when there was a loud knock at the door. Maria groaned as she pulled back from Michael.

“I better get that...and no, I can’t leave it Spaceboy. It might be important...”

“Sure...i’m sure its important at 8.15...”

Maria smiled as she heard him continue to grumble as she went to the door. When she got there she opened it to see a very agitated looking Alex.

“Alex? What ar...”

“Where is he?”

Maria looked at Alex. Of course he would come but Michael couldn’t deal with this just now.

“You know Alex I don’t think this is a goo....”

“I Just want to talk to Michael, Maria. I am not leaving until I see him so you can either let me in to talk to him or I will camp out in the front lawn all night. But I will see him before I leave...”

“Maria? Who is...oh, Alex. Figures. Let him in Maria. I may as well get this over with...”
Maria looked at the two closest men in her life. Each one stared at the other as Alex stepped past her and stood in front of Michael.

“Maria, I want to speak to Michael in private is that ok with you?”

“Actually...I think I’ll stay.”

“No Maria, you go and see a movie or something. I think me and Alex better talk alone. Isn’t that right Alex?”

They continued their staring contest as Maria looked from one to the other. She realised that she would only get in the way here and maybe it would be a good idea to get someone over to calm the situation down a little. She reluctantly agreed with them and grabbed her bag and backed out the door.

“Bye then. I’ll be back soon so don’t...don’t do anything stupid ok? I’m going over to my moms to see Kyle and...and I’ll be...back soon.”

Neither of them acknowledged her as they continued looking at each other. But as soon as they heard the door close Michael began to speak.

“I take it Isabel sent you round? Her “knight in shining armour” to bash the “big bad Michael” for ignoring her.”

“No one sent me around here Michael. I came here on my own. You really hurt her this time Michael. She did not deserve what you said to her.”

Alex spoke slowly and Michael noticed him clench and unclench his fist repeatedly. A sure sign that he was trying to control his emotions. Alex was usually a really mellow guy but when ever someone he cared about was upset his personality changed dramatically.

“I disagree there...I was really restrained in what I said. I could have been a lot worse...”

Alex looked at Micheal...he wasn’t sorry?

“What happened to you up there Michael? You would never have hurt anyone deliberately before; especially not Isabel. I won’t let you rip her apart because you have a chip on your shoulder!”

Michael noted that Alex’s voice was becoming louder and deliberately walked towards the kitchen turning his back on him. As he walked he quietly spoke.

“You don’t want to know what happened there. But take heart in the fact that if your wife had came with us, millions of lives would have been saved. Think of that when you hold her tonight...between the two of you, you killed millions of innocent people because you were both selfish. You I can understand, I mean you’re only human but her? She just wanted an easy life.”

“An easy life? You think she had an “easy life” here? Don’t dare turn your back to me Michael. I’m not Isabel...I won’t take it!”

With that Alex rushed up to him and grabbed his arm to spin him around.

“You do take it all the time. No wonder Isabel stayed...she had her cozy life here with her very own lap-dog.”

Alex drew his fist back and punched the wall beside Michael. It would have been so easy to punch him. Alex looked hard at Michael...normally he wouldn’t care. He would have punched him already and felt a lot better but something was wrong this time. Something held him back...the provocation was there, but it wasn’t Michael speaking. The words were coming out from his mouth, and it was his voice and it was his eyes that were looking at him coolly. But something was wrong and as much as every instinct screamed at him to hurt him as much as he had hurt Isabel. But deep down he knew something had already got there.

“Michael. If Isabel had left here I would be dead and our children would be orphans. I nearly died and it was only because she kept me alive long enough to reach the hospital that I’m standing here. She didn’t make you leave here...”

Michael looked at Alex as his voice changed. Alex let go of his arm and spoke more calmly.

“She didn’t volunteer to go! We had always said we would all stay together...if she had went we would have got home two years ago!”

“And I would be dead and my family would be orphaned!”

“It might not have happened that way...”

“But we could have risked it just so you could get home a little quicker? Thanks a lot.”

“Don’t turn this around to make it about you! Everything is always about you and Isabel! Just go home Alex...go back to your happy life and leave me to mine.”

Alex almost turned towards the door. He almost decided to give up talking to him as he clearly wasn’t getting through. He almost did all of that but after he walked a couple of steps he turned back towards Michael.

“You know something Michael? I am not an alien and I didn’t fight in the war, and I cost you 2 years and I might even have the blood of a million people on my hands...but I will always care about what happens to you guys. I will always care about what happens to you. So will Isabel. No matter what happens we will always be linked. You can shut the door on me all you want but I will keep knocking it until you either let me in or fry me. So accept that...things clearly weren’t good up there...but you have to deal with that rather than looking for someone to blame.”

“You think I’m looking for someone to blame?”

“I think you don’t want to deal with the real issues...”

“And that would be?”

“That you went of to a planet and fought in a war and as a result you did things you maybe aren’t proud of? Or you might have seen things happen that makes you feel ill just thinking about them?”

Michael turned to Alex and looked at him. He tried to speak but found that he had to force the words out of his mouth.

“Maybe...”

The pair of them stood in silence before Alex spoke again.

“You can talk to me Michael. And you can talk to Isabel, but only if you get your head sorted out because if you EVER make her cry again I swear to God I will hurt you.”

With that Alex turned and began to walk towards the door. Michael watched him retreat and took a deep breath. He felt the hot burn of tears at the corner of his eyes and it was only then he heard the words escape his lips involuntarily and sounding pained.

“Alex? Do...you want a cup of coffee or something? And...you can tell me what I have missed in the past 4 years?”

TBC

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