Note: Some of these are inside jokes...don't feel too bad.
You've been warned...
Dumb Lists
Things NOT to do While Driving
created with some help from Myself
1)Feed the cattle
2)Take off your pants
3)Lay an egg
4)Molest old ladies
5)Test hair care products
6)Slaughter chickens
7)Paint yourself and dance around a totem pole
8)Play scrabble
9)Plant a tree
10)Climb a tree
11)Throw pillows at passing bikers
12)Throw bricks at pedestrians
13)Get a root canal
14)Go to the bathroom
Fun Things to do When You're Bored
1)Go outside and test if those strange mushrooms in your back yard are poisonous.
2)Play with angry goats
3)Have a staring contest with a picture of yourself
4)Build a life size model of the Titanic out of bubble gum and toothpicks
5)Eat cheese
6)Make a slingshot
7)Hit things with your slingshot (some good targets=old ladies and children on carousels).
8)Eat more cheese
9)Write stupid lists that no one but yourself finds amusing.
10)Do my Chemistry homework
11)Play flashlight tag at night in a high security prison.
12)Talk to Jesus
13)Think of 100 new uses for rice.
14)Make clothes out of duct tape and bubble wrap.
15)Set grapes on fire
16)Tell dirty jokes to your cat.
17)See if your cat laughs.
18)Smoke Twizzlers
Goat Chunky= Can't live with it, can't live without it.
The clam is hiding in the sand
PULL THE STRING! PULL THE STRING!!!
New Childrens' Book Titles
You're A Mistake
What Mommy REALLY Thinks of You
It's Fun to Pet Foaming Dogs
Grandpa Bob takes Viagra
Fucky the Hamster (inside joke)
A.C.U.W.
Back to where you started
ME
LiNks