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Before It Hits Home
The Price To Pay
By Anastasia Paige


(Alright this is just a creepy monologue. BUT it's a great one. Thanks to lgorges@sktc.net for submitting this awesome monologue. The deal here is (from what I get) this girl is telling someone about how her best friend died for something she didn't do. Her best friend Laura, was attacked by her boyfriend Jimmy because he was under the impression that she cheated on him. He stabs her, and she survives, but kills herself because she felt guilt. Laura's best friend is reading the letter they found when Laura hanged herself.)



I sit and think, think about what I need to do. What I need to do before my head blows up. Think think think. I can't think logically. The most logical thing I have thought of since it happened was the fact that I need to think logically. I just can't...you wouldn't be able to either. Don't judge me, you don't even know me, you don't know inside you CAN'T know inside me, no one can. I don't even know inside me anymore. I couldn't help it, I just couldn't, I tried so hard to make it stop.....IT, such a funny word, used so much....IT....can be used for many different things. I didn't do anything wrong, and I have to pay. I have to pay for something that isn't my fault. But maybe it was. Don't judge me, don't look at me like that, I will talk if you will listen, and to listen you must hear me also, hear me, hear me, hear my voice, hear what I am saying PLEASE!

It was a dark and stormy night, a beautiful night, I LOVE storms. Starring out my window watching nature's beauty curl in around my house. I couldn't help myself.....I walk out of my house and stood in the rain, the wonderful, hard, drenching rain. A flash of lightening, a figure a few feet away from me.
"Hello, who are you?".....no answer. "Please say something, I saw you, I know you are there."
Another flash, the figure still stands there. I hear the figure walk toward me, a man.
"I am glad you decided to converse with me," I said, he didn't answer but grabbed me and threw me on the wet soggy ground, the smell of grass surrounded me. Finally I heard the voice, the voice of my ex-boyfriend.
Ragged and cold-hearted he spoke to me, "You are a slut, a skank, and tramp, no one wants you but me, you will learn you will learn, you will pay, you will pay!" he shouted.
"I did nothing wrong!" I said
"Nothing?"
This angered him deeply, "you will pay with something you can't have back, if I can't have you no one can, DIE, you whore, DIE!"
Ravishly he took out a knife and I tried to reason with him.

"No, Jimmy! No! Please, no! Please, I didn't mean to hurt you! Please, stop! Please!" I tried to get up off the ground, he kicked me back down, I couldn't see a thing with wet hair in my face, the rain getting harder, thunder boomed up above.

"You can't run away, you can't, you can leave but you can't run away."

I didn't understand his words and cried frantically, "No, please Jimmy stop! No!"

I felt the pain sharp and agnoizing my stomach, over and over again, I want to die, I want to die, I want to die. Please God, kill me. The pain in my stomach over and over, in my arms and once in my neck. Finally, I was freed of the pain. I blacked out. My debt was paid for something I didn't do. I didn't cheat on him-- I DIDN'T! I swear, why don't you believe me?!! Trust me, please, I didn't cheat on him, no I...I didn't, I would never!

I woke up in the hospital, blinded with the pain all over my body, but mostly in my head. I couldn't bear the thought of what happened to me, the memory was burning holes in my brain. I was stabbed 5 times in the stomache, 1 time in my right arm, 2 in my left, and 1 in the throat. My body lived... but my soul had died. I knew what I was going to do. I was going to give Jimmy what he wanted. I couldn't live with the memory, I just couldn't, it was the only thing I could do to make Jimmy happy, to put his mind at peace. I slit my wrists and it was going too slow, 10 minutes I waited and nothing happened, so I tied a rope to my window (two stories up) and tied the other end around my neck. Then jumped out the window.

This was the note that her parents found in her room after they found her hung by her neck in her window with her wrists slit. This was my best friend, Laura. I couldn't believe Jimmy could do somthing like this, I couldn't believe it. She paid for what she didn't do. He needed to pay, too. I shot him in the head when he was leaving a club at 1:00am. He deserved it and I don't feel guilty. I hope that Laura and Jimmy went to the same place, so that she can take care of what she needs to do with him. But I also hope he burns in Hell. He deserves it for what he did to her. He finally paid his price, and I sleep fine at night, I hope Laura does too.

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