My friends and I are basically working on THE DEFINITIVE Bad Movie Collection!
This page is dedicated to the memory of Mike Kollar,one of my best friends,
who was taken from us without warning
after a heartbreaking battle with leukemia. Mike always loved his movies,
and I can't think of a better way to honor him!
!!WARNING!!
Only watch these cinematic flops with a large supply of: aspirin, hard liquor (which by the way
helped US a lot!), or insanity (of which we have copious amounts)!
Avenging Disco Godfather - The longest godawful insanely painful 93 minutes of my life! ouch.
Batman 2, 3, 4, 37, etc... - Take 7 of dese and call me in da mornink! (sound of blowing chunks)
Beowulf - If you like this Mortal Combat, future past piece of crap, I'll cut your arm off!
Blair Witch 2 - Watch this movie in reverse, and maybe you'll toss your cookies that way too!
Contact - I feel like I watched 19 hours worth of movie in 2 hours!
The Crow 2 - ANOTHER crow? I don't think so!
Cutthroat Island - Gina Davis is NOT a pirate! Bad dog!
Dark Star - A really bad space movie about an intelligent bomb. Watch for the beach ball/space monster!
Death Becomes Her - Death is too good for this movie!
Death Race 2000 - The movie that inspired the Carmageddon video game! A very young Sly Stallone!
Deep Blue Sea - Injecting sharks to affect brain cells, they get intelligence and then really mean! DOH!
Deep Impact - Imagine a giant wave coming towards you! You'd scream for daddy too!
Dumb and Dumber - It was. Then it got worse. Much worse.
Dungeon Master - Made by no less than seven different directors, and it shows! Excalibrate!
Dungeons and Dragons - A good Snails is a dead Snails! :-P
Eyes Wide Shut - A long, slow movie about........ what was it about again?
Face Off - Trading faces? ummmmm.....OK. Just shoot them both!
Falling Down - 0ops! It fell. Hard.
Fight Club - Rule #1: Don't talk about this cheesy movie. Rule #2: This sucks. Don't mention this movie. Rule #3:....
Final Destination - OH NO! I cheated death once! Now I have to watch my back, cause it's after me! Yeah right.
Fist of the North Star - A kung fu action flick highlighted by the phrase "Look out, he's got a knife!".
Fortress - Christopher Lambert? WHY GOD? WHY?
Ghost Dog - BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! "Do me a favor, read this book?" (Ya had to be there!)
Godzilla 1985 - Can't kill godzilla? Make sounds like a bird! (huh?)
Gremlins 2 - Was it just me, or was this an evil version of the Muppet Show?
Highlander 2 - Regular and Renegade versions - They come from another planet? Please! Leave
well enough alone!
I Spit on Your Grave - Basically a long rape scene with some revenge at the end.
I Spit on Your Grave,Too! - Not related to the previous title, this is the longest,drawn out horror film I've ever experienced.
Killer Clowns From Outer Space! - Cotton candy cocoons, blow up bloodhound balloons, and popcorn guns! Icky!
Knights - Oh no, am I on fire now?
Kull the Conqueror - Ok, I like it, but it's Kevin Sorbo for gosh sakes!
Lake Placid - A giant crocodile terrorizes a little town. Doh!
The Lost Boys - HA HA HA HA HA! Slurp!
Mardi Gras for the Devil - I think the name speaks for itself!
Mars Attacks! - At least it was enjoyably horrible. Does that make any sense?
Naked Space - C'mon, sing along! I wanna eat your face....
Night at the Roxbury - STOP with the SNL skit movies!!
Q the Winged Serpent - Flying monster, David Carradine,and Scat singing? No.
The Relic - It wants your hypothalamus! How many movies can say THAT?
Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves - NEW TITLE: Prince of crap! Sorry, it just that I feel Kevin Costner must DIE!!!
Robocop 3 - Sorry, shoulda stopped the series while you were ahead!
Seven - This was actually not too bad, 'til the end!
Slave Girls from Beyond Infinity - Cult flick with the line, "I think the laws of time and space no longer apply here!".
Sliver - Get a plot. (click)
Space Truckers - Space is taken over by people with southern accents! Dennis Hopper,too!
Species - It's looking for the perfect mate! (Guess I'm safe!)
Speed 2 - At least all sequels don't suck this badly!
Supernova - Well.........ummmmm....it has ninth dimensional matter? Oh, never mind!
Virtuosity - It was virtually unwatchable!
Waterworld - Three words: Kevin Costner Movie. 'Nuff said!
The X Files Movie - Wasn't this movie supposed to answer something?
"Let's watch the trilogy!" - Mike Kollar
Return to Main Page To The Movie Favorites Vault Find out about these movies and more: Go To Movie Listings and Ratings
www.angelfire.com/realm/hawkwolf
