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The Beautiful People

stick guy

Stick-guy profile

In real life stick-guy is actually 30 stone (I have no idea what that is in Lbs or Kg) and has been unable to leave his house for the past ten years, not that he wants to. If not asleep he spends his time downloading fake porn images of well-known celebrities (like they’re going to be genuine) has been known to do some work on this website occasionally. (Stick-guy appears through the courtesy of his mum)

goat boy

Goat-boy profile

Born half man half goat (please don’t ask) he naturally excelled at being a goat-boy. This has come in handy for nothing so far as the whole fighting crime thing didn’t work out (again for the love of god don’t ask) Often mistaken for “the beast” from the book of revelation he has been known to sign fake autographs for fans of heavy metal bands who believe Satan speaks to them through their music (tell me exactly how do you play a CD backwards? – don’t answer that we know already)


Apollo Satori profile

Now this guy was smart…refused to let us show his picture on here…wish I’d thought of that.

Anyway our resident Art critic (like he’s got the right to judge…ever sold any of your work? No? Didn’t think so…) He’s only a part timer here at The Halo Homepages and probably wont see this so I’m not going to bother filling it out. Once had a drawing he did shown on kids TV….he was six.


Prudence Halo profile

Prudence used to be a follower of Newcastle united until they took out that injunction to stop her. She now spends her time poking her nose into other people’s problems to gain gossip by posing as an agony aunt. Despite rumours to the contrary prudence will not be appearing nude on this site any time…ever, so stop asking, Dad. Oh and before we forget don’t believe what you read on AG Sam This is NOT who you think it is.


Paul1574 profile

Site owner and main administrator to hear him talk you would think he did ALL the damn work around here…well what about us eh? We work here too and you’d be lost without us, like to see YOU offer to make a coffee one day or even just speak to us once in a while instead of chatting up Prudence (like you have even a ghost of a chance anyway ) Once nominated for worst employer of the year we still have no idea how he didn’t win it (we think it was fixed)

We have been asked to point out that the people being described here did not write their own profiles.

And that if P15 finds out who did this to his picture he’s gonna kick their asses so badly