Self-Esteem

The submissive's participation in BDSM activities may change her perception of herself. Immediate submissives into the kinky-sex side of BDSM may not think of themselves as more than sexually adventurous.

As their involvement, and pleasure/satisfaction, from PDR grows they may begin to question their moral and social values. This will likely come from a realization that what they are doing "isn't normal". They may feel confused or guilty and their own self-image may be lowered if they think that they are doing something "bad".

Alternatively, as they realize that they do achieve a significant amount of satisfaction from their act of submission they may enter a phase of self-denial, denying how satisfying, pleasurable or even necessary it really is to them. Slave's, particularly, are prone to this, denying that they are truly experiencing a need as opposed to a simple desire.

A submissive, when experiencing any of these negative self-image reactions to her involvement with BDSM will recover best when she has the support of others with similar interests. This will help her accept her desires and activities. Left alone or isolated she will find no community support and her feelings may turn to guilt and lowered self-worth.

With the support of a caring dominant a submissive can also feel pride in her achievements as a submissive. The physical and emotional skills that she must learn, the discipline that she must master, all give her skills that she can recognize as making her "better" and making her grow as a person.