The Growth and Development of a Submissive

A submissive does not enter the lifestyle "fully formed". Instead she enters with some idea of her wants and needs and, as her experience grows, her appreciation of what the lifestyle offers matures (possibly sparking new ideas) as does her own awareness of her wants and needs.

She will try various things, possibly with a range of partners. The different techniques, both physical and emotional, will have their effects and she will select what she likes and what she finds pleasing or necessary for her.

Things that were possibly new and exciting at the beginning will maybe lose their gloss and things that were once considered beyond her limits will become desirable.

Variety will likely be the most important for the purely recreational submissive, but for psychological submissives and slaves certain specific acts of submission will be discovered that "do the trick" better than others.

It is likely that a submissive will enter the scene as an immediate submissive. It is unlikely that she would be aware that there is the possibility of any deep satisfaction being found in PDR alone unless she recognizes masochism in herself.

So, she will explore sensation and pain play, bondage and fantasy role-playing. This may be enough for her and she may remain an immediate submissive.

She might find that control and PDR itself stir something inside her. She will the explore different types of PDR and play with different intensities, maybe pushing her own limits. With experience she will both be able to identify the acts of submission that she best responds to, and will also learn the ability to let herself respond deeply to the control and to the PDR and find satisfaction in it. The ablilty to respond is both a psychological and emotional skill that will take her considerable time to develop. It consists partly of a journey of self-discovery and self-recognition. She will become, as a consequence of this journey, a psychological submissive.

The "something" that stirs inside her may be the coalescing of miscellaeneous small, different feelings, cravings, wants or needs into a single focussed one. What she finds from satisfying this may be enough to trigger a type of dependency, thus making her, instead of a psychological submissive, a slave to the resultant need.

In any case, along the way she will undoubtedly experience new feelings and find new desires and possibly needs within her.