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by Kate H Live from an aluminum trash can, it's. . . The Sharpie Show! I have a sheep! Sheep! Sheep! His name is Joe! Joe! Joe! He cuts my lawn! Lawn! Lawn! That much I know! Know! Know! He eats my grass! Grass! Grass! And grows his hair! Hair! Hair! And when he's done! Done! Done! My lawn is bare! Bare! Bare! I have a cow! Cow! Cow! His name is Sue! Sue! Sue! His coat is pink! Pink! Pink! With spots of blue! Blue! Blue! He wants to be! Be! Be! An opera star! Star! Star! But with his voice! Voice! Voice! He won't go far! Far! Far! Girl: Hi howdy hey everyone! Boy: Yo. Both: Welcome to another blatant knock-off of the Pencil Show. . . the Sharpie Show! Girl: We're your hosts! I'm Kate! Boy: And I'm Max. Kate: Now if you've read the Pencil Show, you know what this is all about. Max: If not, GO READ IT FOR RUTA'S SAKE! WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?! Kate: Here we'll kidnap random His Dark Materials characters and force them to. . .. Both: REVEAL THEIR MOST HIDEOUS SECRETS! BWAHAHAHA! Kate: Our first guest is. . . Max: Wait a minute. I still don't get why we're calling this the Sharpie Show. Why can't we call it something cool . . . like the Spatula show? *pulls out Chester, the Spatula of Doom* Kate: Or the Microphone show! *pulls out Gwenivere, the Uber-Spiffy Microphone* Max: Exactly. A Sharpie is a stupid pen. What made you name our show after one? Kate: Because I just used one to outline this pretty picture of you hitting on Ruta Skadi! *holds up a picture of an elegant and detailed Ruta Skadi glaring at a stick figure surrounded by cartoon hearts containing garish color* Max: WHAT?! Kate: So this is the Sharpie Show! *grin* Max: Damn you. Kate: ^_^ Max: Since we don't have time for a show today, we *looks at theme song* . . . hey, wait a minute. . . how can a cow named Sue be a guy? Kate: Dontcha remember the song about a boy named Sue? Max: Kindly never mention that in my presence. Kate: BOY NAMED SUE! BOY NAMED SUE! Max: *Whacks Kate with Chester, the Spatula of Doom* Kate: Ow! Max: As I was saying. . . Kate: Before you went off on a tangent. Max: *glare* AS I WAS SAYING. . . our first guest ever is that liar extraordinaire, Lyra Silvertongue/Belacqua! Kate: YAAAAY! So send in your questions for Lyra, and remember not to feed the purple cheese llamas! Max: That made absolutely no sense. Kate: I know ^_^ Max: Right. Kate: So ask Lyra your questions, and don't forget to review! Max: See ya. Kate: Bye! ================== A.N. Hey, there's Pencil Show spin-offs for Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings in abundance. Why not His Dark Materials? ^_^ Kate is real, because she's meeeh *grin*. Max is my imaginary friend, consisting of elements taken from all of my male friends. He's named after the guy who introduced me to His Dark Materials. He's fun to annoy! The Pencil Show is copyright Hikaness (*waves* HIYA HIKA!), and I don't own anything His Dark Materials. Nor do I own Sharpie Pens. Well, I own one but not in the sense that I own the company or whatever ^^;;; That should be obvious. So send in your questions for Lyra! Return to Fanfic/Fanart Home Return Home |
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