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Why Cyber Lesbians Suck

5/18/01 * cyberlesbian: a self-identified gay woman whose ego is attached to her keyboard. Found inhabiting chatrooms, BBS's, mailing lists and various other assorted cyber media.

Once upon a time and long ago in a land far away, lesbians met at bars or at social gatherings sponsored by lesbian/gay organizations. Courtship, romance, love, and marriage' had a basis in reality.

The keyword is REALITY. There was flesh and blood attached to the persons involved, there were telephone numbers exchanged, 'dates' arranged, and periods of getting to know one another in REAL TIME and in REAL situations.

We are NOT so foolish as to believe that mistakes are not made, that out and out weirdoes don't exist in the world at large, but generally we learn how to avoid such persons and live our lives in relative calm.


When we came online in the latter part of the last century, we immediately started looking for gay/lesbian chat spaces or rooms.

We wanted,first and foremost, to have some friends and/or 'penpals' and to connect to the lesbian community that we couldn't find locally while in the meantime enjoying chatting on diverse topics with women who wear sensible shoes.

Anything else, we told ourselves, could develop in the ways we were used to them developing--over time, with ups and downs, ins and outs, give and take.

But Gentle Reader, a strange thing happened on the way through the cyber forums.

Whenever we have gone into chat we have had to work VERY hard at fending off the types of 'cyberlesbian ravings' described below:

. sorting through the 'terminal illnesses of the month

. whinings, pinings and certifiably insane rants

. racist, sexist and totally ignorant postings,

. private requests from one handed typists,

. promises,exaggerations and outright lies,

. numerous marriage proposals based on love at first byte,

. flamers, gamers and playas

. cyber body parts (@)(@) and (_|_) guaranteed to ensure some buffoon will see the hilarity in this and type, *lol*

. assorted acronyms (speaking of buffoons) such as *lol*, *lmao*

So, read on, you may recognize yourself or someone you know. Love it or hate it but we assure you, you will NEVER look at chat and cyber lesbians in the same light again.

Disclaimer: Yes, we have found friends online..the kind of friends that we are NOT ashamed to be ourselves with, the kind of friends who 'go the distance' and more.

We are two women who met through this medium, and have survived a "real life" meeting and we continue to enjoy a wonderful friendship that spans two countries, countless bottles of soda, late night snacks and several all night cyber pajama party gossipfests.

Not for the Cyber Sensitive or the Faint of Heart

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