Garage Sale

 

Ratty old clothes,

Of all horrid hue

Some haven't seen day

Since 1972,

But they're only a quarter

And they'll look fine on you.

 

So won't you please, won't you please,

Won't you please buy my things?

 

Tatty knick-knacks

From trips long ago.

Keychains from Spokane

And a spoon from Reno.

Why did I buy them?

I may never know.

 

But won't you please, won't you please,

Won't you please buy my stuff?

 

An ancient Nintendo

From an era that was.

The controllers are sticky

And it's growing some fuzz,

But what, does it work?

Well, uh-sure it does!

 

Won't you please, won't you please,

Won't you please buy my junk?

 

Now that object right there

Will put you back nine.

It's useful, it's helpful,

And it works very fine!

If I knew what it was,

It's not even mine...

 

But won't you please, won't you please,

Won't you please buy my trash?

 

I can't sell this garbage,

No matter how hard I try.

And to say that you need it,

That would be a lie.

But I hope, if I'm lucky,

You break it-you buy!

 

So won't you please, won't you please,

Won't you please take this crap?!